Lighthouse | A Breath of the Wild ZeLink Modern AU

Chapter 37 : Zelda's despair

I was sitting on the ground under the pouring rain, shivering. Sometimes, a thunderlight illuminated the dark sky, followed by a loud growl. Some flashes of light through the darkness. Some terrific screams through the awful silence of the night.

I was cold, soaked and terrified all alone, only surronded by the ruins of the Garrison's Ruins. Here, only the souls of the courageous soldiers who defended Hyrule centuries ago remained. Their courageous souls while mine was torn, weak and sullied.

Sullied by his hands on me, his lips on mine and by his awful aura that contaminated mine. His awful aura, his awful sin that ruined my life. His awful sin everyone saw.

Everyone will think that I liked what he did to me. Everyone will think that I'm a whore. Because everyone believe what strangers say on Internet.

I bursted into tears, again. My tears were tangled with the many raindrops that were crashing on my face.

And maybe that was better that way. Because I could pretend I wasn't crying again. Because I could pretend it was only rain. Because I could pretend that nothing happened.

My painful throat brought me back to reality. Every sob, every cry, every breath was still a sharpen knife that was cutting down my airways. But the worst thing was my ankle. A violent pain every step, but I had to endure it, I had to escape, I had to run away. Because it was nothing compared to Father's words.

I have been assaulted, I have been choked, and he called me a whore. Because he misinterpreted a picture. Because he thought I was enjoying it while I was terrified. Because he thought I was hooking up with many boys while I was still a virgin. Because he chase me while I was hopeless.

I sheltered under one of the ruins, now sitting on the cold and wet stones that were stairs once. I held my legs in my arms and burried my head in my knees as I let out a desperate scream and I finally let go all of my pain, all of my sadness, all of my anger. All of my fears.

This is a nightmare.

My body was shaken by my unstoppable sobs and tears were running down my cheeks, untamable, flowing like a river. My life was crumbling in front of my eyes and I couldn't do anything to fix it. Because they all hated me, because they all assumed wrong things about me and I knew it will get worse as the days will pass.

What if he never showed up. What if he saw the picture and changed his mind ? And worse than this, what if he didn't see it yet and abandon me as soon as his eyes land on Toruma and I ?

What if I didn't only lose Father tonight ? What if I also lost the boy I was dating, the boy I trusted with my whole heart. The boy I couldn't live without.

I can't lose you ! I can't ! It will be too hard without you !

Because, even if we weren't together for a long time, I felt like I couldn't live without him. Because the world stopped spinning the second I looked at him. The second I met his ocean eyes. The second I dove in his immense, infinite and somehow terrific ocean.

But... I wasn't scared. I wasn't scared of his crashing waves. I wasn't scared of his abysses. I wasn't sacred of this unknown universe. Because it was him. It's always been him.

And it will always be you.

I had a look at the threatening sky, not able to see a single star tonight. No one was there for me. Not my ancestors, not even Mother.