The approaching night weighs heavily upon me, I am fighting to resist being overcome.
My senses are filled with aching, and my heart growing weak.
Lost in the labyrinth of forgetfulness, please do not let me fade into obscurity.
I implore you, save me. Confusion has left me disoriented and distant, and I continue to descend deeper.
I offer up my life as a dedication to you, you have the power to consume every part of me.
Take hold of my flesh and blood As this euphoria is sacrificed by the hand of destiny.
The never-ending anguish and longing.
A punishment that challenges destiny itself.
My self-absorbed unawareness and delusion swallow the depths of forgetfulness.
It is treacherous.
Filled with darkness akin to a criminal's hideout.
Yet, here you stand, radiating with brilliance and illumination.
You: Hope.
I started writing poems as I felt everything was going wrong with my life. Poems, diary, letters, all dedicated to you, Hope.
"I wish I was always happy and radiant as you Y/n" Lisa remarks after another "break-up" with a boy that felt like her 100th boyfriend so far.
I wish so too.
"Lisa, you have to appreciate life, look around, look at the people you have near and really love you, you're not alone and you don't have to find confidence and approval from boys that just want to fuck you. Stop talking to those boys, you know that they are just going to fuck you once and then block you from their life. Is it that necessary to have a boy?
You always say that you need a men or you are lonely, but what about us? Francis, Yoongi, Jisoo and Rosè.
And what about me? Have you realized how much I've done for you? And you still feel lonely? Do you even consider myself as your friend?" I start explaining her, somehow realization slowly hitting me.
"Look at our boss. Even tho the business is not going well he wants to keep us and still pays us a lot. Look our coworkers: we might not be friends outside of work, but we all get along and laugh all day long. Most of the times coworkers never get along and don't even talk to each others." I continue.
"Look at me and Rosè: even after all you complaints, which were always the same, your victimism, your selfishness, even after all of these we're still with you, helping each others. If me and Rosè were like other people, we would have stopped listening to your things and not be friend with you, but we love you.
Look at your family, they're on the other side of the world and still call you everyday, because they are interested in your life and want to support you no matter what.
We all love you Lisa. But do you love yourself?"
Once again I find myself in the void. Everything is black around me. Those painful yet beautiful words I spitted at Lisa keeps echoing in this dark room, just one figure in front of me.
Myself.
"What about you Y/n? Do you love yourself?"
Loving yourself might be harder, than loving someone else, let's admit it, the standards you make are more strict for yourself.
Now forgive yourself, you life is long, trust yourself when lost in a maze.
The me of yesterday,
The me of today,
The me of tomorrow,
With no exception, is all me.
Loving yourself doesn't require anyone else's permission.
You've shown me I have reasons I should love myself.
You: Y/n.
"Yes, I do love myself"
"Y/n? Are you listening?"
I shake my head, a bit confused of what just happened and see Lisa waving her hand in front of my face, her eyes all swallen, tinted by a strong red that looks even more intense though her diamond tears. Her nose, flushed pink and her lips trembling.
"I'm sorry Y/n...I didn't know my actions would make people around me think that way. The fact is that you are right. I know that...I just need to work on it" she gets closer to me, hinting me her search for physical affection that she's been missing lately.
I embrace her and lovingly stroke her back, soothing all her emotions and giving her some peace.
"Woah, did I interrupt something?"
I look up at the sudden low voice, that startles me and Lisa.
"Yoongiii!!! Helloooo!" I immediately shout, running to him and distracting him from Lisa, giving her time to dry up her tears.
I completely forgot how we were still at the restaurant and how is almost time for the service to start.
"Lisa, are you feeling ok?" the male growls.
"Actually no...I just need some rest, but I'll be fine" she gives us a weak smile before shrugging her shoulders.
"Why don't you go home? Yoongi can handle it alone in the kitchen and I'll be the waitress tonight! There should be no problem, right Yoongi?" I look at the boy, giving him a hint with my eyes to agree with my idea.
"Yeah, no worries. Go home and rest well" he coldly says, but we know that this is his way to show affection.
"Yoongi!! One appetizer, two pastas and one steak for table number 10! He's also going to order dessert later" I shout to the chef, going behind the counter and start preparing the drinks.
"Table 10?How many people are they?" Yoongi exits the kitchen, a perplexed expression displaing, trying to look at table 10.
"One guy. I told him that this might be too much for one person, but he told me that he's very hungry and that he loves food" I try to explain him as I start agitating the shaker to prepare his drink.
"Wow, he's not even chubby and he eats all of that?" Yoongi complains as he goes back to his work, making me giggle at his jealousy.
But that really got me thinking, this guy must be so lucky to eat all of that and not gain any weight. He's tall, kind of fit, with long dark hair and many tattoes.
This image is very common in this area, but we don't see many of them at our restaurant, especially alone.
"Wow, he also ate the dessert..." I mumble to myself as I see him finishing the dessert as well.
He sets aside the fork and delicately wipes his lips with the neatly folded white napkin that was laying on his lap.
Despite his commanding presence, he exudes an air of grace, refinement, and intrigue that captivates me with each gesture.
He finishes the last of his water, his throat moving gracefully as he prepares to pay at the counter with a confident and purposeful stride.
"Was everything ok Mr?" I ask as he hands me his black credit card "It will be 90$ Sir"
"Please don't call me sir, Darling. I am not that much older than you."
His warm and inviting voice, resonating from deep within his chest, is melodious and enchanting.
It has an irresistible charm that captivates my senses, evoking a sense of allure and delight.
His soothing voice transports me to another realm, embracing my body with a feeling of calmness and serenity.
Pleasant, arousing, delicious, luscious, luxourious.
He hands me his business card, I am naturally intrigued and eager to learn more about this enigmatic individual, I decide to take a peak of his details on his cards, when I read his name my heart drops.
"Hi my little alien"
