Chapter XII - Clay's Tape

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As before Tony did what he had been doing. And as before it took a minute before Hannah's continued.

"I've told you about two of the worst decisions I ever made, and the damage left behind...and the people who got hurt. There's two more stories to tell...starting with this one...two more bad decisions...and this one of the last two is all on me. No. It wasn't the decision to go to the party. Because how could I have known? But it was the same night. That same awful night. Remember one of the last stories I was saving for later? Well, this is it. And it's all about you...Clay."

"Clay I know you're asking yourself why you're on these tapes. What could you have possibly done? What else could have happened the night of Jessica's party? Part of me was saying, "Ask me again." But part of me was saying, "Don't go." Not even for Clay. I should have listened to that part of me. See, I never told you, Clay, but I've always admired you. You are who you are, and you don't care. And I always cared what other people thought of me, as much as I acted like I didn't. Is that a boy/girl thing, or a Clay/Hannah thing? I bet you also wish you'd never gone to Jessica's. Right Clay?"

"I bet you wish you hadn't invited me. I'd talked to you a million times before, but...tonight was different, and...I didn't know what to say to you. But when you finally came up to me...you knew just how to break the ice. I was so nervous that night, but you made it seem so...easy."

"So, let's start with the part of the party that I left out."

"At that moment...everything was perfect. And for the first time in a long time...I could imagine a future where I was happy. How good life could be. And I know you felt it too. I wanted you to do everything you were doing...so I don't know why my mind took me everywhere else. And I thought of everything other guy. And they all became you. Part of me was saying "Please don't leave." Part of me never wanted to see you again. But you walked out that door...like I told you to. Why did you have to leave? It was the worse thing ever. And then it got worse. Clay...Helmet...your name doesn't belong on this list. But you need to be here if I'm going to tell my story. If I'm going to explain why I did what I did. Because you aren't every other guy. You're different. You're good and kind...and decent. And I didn't deserve to be with someone like you. I never would. I would have ruined you. It wasn't you. It was me...and everything that's happened to me."

And that's where Clay's tape ended.

"The one person besides her mother and I that she could have trusted in this broken world." Brittany said.

And Tony nodded in agreement with her, and added, "The person anyone would be extremely lucky to have as a friend. Because he's loyal to a fault." Caleb nodded in agreement with Tony.

Tony got another tape ready to put in. However, he hesitated to put it in. And even exchanged a very worried look with Caleb, Ryan, Clay, Jessica, Alex, and Tyler that was definitely not missed by anyone in the room. "Are you ready to continue?"

Brittany sighed, and asked Tony, "It's now on me isn't it?"

Tony just nodded while tensing up along with everyone in the room, including Brittany.

"I'm ready as I will ever be." Brittany said calmly. Her face a calm mask like Jean-Claude's would be. Which was unnerving, even to the Vampires in the room. And which also worried them all even more.

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