Michael's pov:
Going back to school was the absolute worst. People continued staring and I knew it wasn't going to end. Val did as much as she could to distract me, my eyes we're still keen on Noah, he looked so much more happier. Did I ruin him? Is this all my fault? Flashbacks kept going round in my mind, kissing Noah, sleeping with him, cuddles, hugs, his hair, his eyes everything.
"I deserve this." I muttered under my breath
"Hell yeah you do fatass." Mary replied
"Leave me alone. Your already ruined my life are you happy? Now fuck off" I rolled my eyes and continued my work
"It wasn't me." She answered
"What do you mean?" I asked
"Why would I tell you?" She asked
"Fuck off then" I copied the next part down
"I'll tell you if you do something for me in return."
"Just say it, you want Noah, go ahead take him." I mumbled feeling hurt just by saying his name
"Really hurts doesn't it?" She whispered
"Not like you care about me anyways." I bit my lip
"Admit it, don't be a pussy." She teased
"I'm not a pussy." I replied
"Then admit it" she smirked
"Fine, yes it does, obviously it does I fucking loved him. Now tell me who did all this. It's only fair."
"Guess it I'll give clues."
"Whatever"
"Michael, Mary listen!" The teacher shouted
The end of the lesson Mary told me to meet her on the third floor by the end of the day. I did I wanted to know who really hates me to the core, who really want me depressed.
"Got any vapes?" She asked
"Why should I share with you?" I asked
"Come on."
"No."
"Whatever, fine let's begin"
When she about to speak someone pushed me I looked up and it was Noah, hugging Mary. Oh. They kissed right in front of me not caring about what happened. His eyes glowed, he smiled, he looked so much happier it hurt me.
"I'll meet you in five" Mary said pecking his lips and he left. She smirked at me.
My face was hot from feeling upset and overwhelmed.
"You don't want to tell me do you? You just wanted Noah to run up to you and kiss you just so you could rub it into my face even more, you know what I don't wanna know anymore your still the same bratty Mary Schmidt." I bit my lip to stop myself from drowning in to tears.
"I do wanna tell you." She said when I turned away
"No you don't." I sniffed
"I'll tell you tomorrow then, meet me here at eight sharp." And she walked off.
Fat little fucker I hate her so much, I hate Noah as well. Even after everything. I fucking saved him when we were six, raised him, taught him, I looked after him and risked my life for that bastard and he just goes and dumps me in front of everyone and kisses my ex. I hate you Noah Anderson no wonder you parents left. I know I'll regret saying that soon but he deserves it for now. Val rang me and I broke down crying in the boys toilets telling her everything. Val was excluded from school because she was skiving pe, maths and tech. She also vandalised the girls bathrooms and smoked in front of the staff. She wasn't permanently excluded which was a shocker. She'd come back after a month when GCSE'S come and destroy all of us. I wanted to run away, dump this life. I hated it. I hated being fat, I hated always being the victim, I'm only known as mommy killer when I didn't even kill mama. Why would I? I was a fucking newborn. I told Val I wanted to be alone and I'd come over when I felt calm. I walked to the club and brought drinks. I drank loads. I still didn't feel anything nor was I drunk. Surprise.
"Hey cutie" I heard
"Don't even." And I walked off.
(Tw:drugs, smoking)
Outside it was cold, gloomy and mostly depressing in Bradford it always was. I dug through my pocket till I felt a bag, drugs. I took basically all of them not even seeing what they were, what they could even do to me. I didn't care. I wanted to be out. I lit my cigarette and leaned on the wall smoking.
