For Every Missing Shade

Entry 12

I made a beeline to Stew's house once I woke up.

Yesterday was the first snow of winter, and it was a big one. Most of the city shut down as a consequence.

Stew was out shoveling snow when I saw him. Within the time I saw him until I pulled up to the curb he had almost slipped on ice, raised his head in despair, tried to shovel again, and then fell on his ass. He held the shovel like he was going to smash it to pieces on the sidewalk until he saw me.

I rolled down the window as he got closer. "I think the sidewalk is winning this one, buddy."

He kicked up some snow. "All the damn snow melted and refroze yesterday. There's ice everywhere."

"Well worry no more because I'm here to bother you."

"Oh thank God." He turned around and catapulted his shovel towards his backyard. "You wanna come inside?"

I agreed and put my car in park. There is one small thing I forgot to mention about Stew, and it is that he is crazy wealthy. He's got gaming rooms, a home gym, and a room for billiards and ping pong. In the summer he also has a hot tub the size of my bedroom, an outdoor pool, and a basketball court in his backyard.

We walked in as the cleaning crew was finishing up for the day. Leading them everywhere was Scott, who's worked there since I first met Stew. They claim he's just a nanny but his responsibilities are indistinguishable from that of a butler. That and the fact that Stew is now eighteen and doesn't need a nanny leads me to believe they're just trying to hide it.

He spoke up when we walked in, "you guys want any food?"

Stew shared a look with me. "We'll take some pizzas," he said.

When we went into the room,Stew turned on the projector, and I sat down in one of the recliners.

"So, what brings you to my neck of the woods?" He asked as he tried (and failed) to jump into his seat from behind it.

"Free pizza."

He faked a laugh and picked up a controller. We opened a game about fighting robots and began playing. Apart from dying every two seconds, it was a ton of fun.

After he killed me for the hundredth time he spoke up. "I saw that Emma came back to school."

"Yeah, we figured our stuff out. Sorry again for everything. You didn't deserve for me to go off on you like that." I said apologetically.

"It's alright. I guess I was kind of being a dick with the whole lecture about her anyways."

"You were just looking out for me, I get it. I was just scared, honestly." I realized that this was one of the deeper conversations we'd ever had together. I normally don't bare my emotions to him, especially when it comes to love.

I'm happy for you, man. Really."

"Thanks."

"Now that you guys have made up, though, do you think she's a keeper?"

"Uh, yeah, maybe. She's kinda cool."

"Dude don't lie to me," he said. "One time you talked for almost two hours about how pocket lint made you think about God and the Big Bang. It was this life-changing conversation about the most mundane thing in the world, and now you can't say more than one sentence about how much you like the girl you've been obsessing over?"

"I don't know, what am I supposed to say?"

"Just tell me about her. I wanna know."

"Okay fine, She's amazing. I mean, I've only known her for a month, maybe two. She's kinda turning my world upside down, though. Ya know?"

"Well, as a man who has no experience with girls, I do not know. But keep talking anyways."

"We're just so similar and different at the same time. It's like everything I've always wished I was good at, she is. She makes me better."

"If she's this important to you, I better meet her sometime."

I agreed as we started another game. The nanny/butler/maid took up our pizza while I died another hundred times. It felt weird to talk about girls with Stew, but it also felt nice. I've known him for years now, but there are some subjects where he still felt oddly like a stranger.

And so we kept going down that path. Our conversation opened more doors that we otherwise wouldn't touch, and it felt more natural to do it. We talked about mundane things, exciting things, and everything in between.

As much as I hate to admit it, I probably spent more time with Emma in the past day than I had with Stew the past month. It was nice to have everything bounce back to when it was just us.

He spoke up again. "You can tell me if I'm overstepping, but I'm just curious. All that stuff, was it true?"

I wasn't sure how to respond. I didn't want to lie, but I knew that I couldn't let him in on one of the most intimate stories I've ever heard.

"I think that's something I'll just keep between me and her."

He seemed to take the bait. "Fair enough... So, when are you two going to bang?"

I laughed at the absurdity. "Pervert. Who's to say we haven't already?"

"Maybe it's the fact that she seems to still be into you. If I was a betting man, I'd bet that you don't shine in the sack."

I laughed at first but then I thought more about it. I had no clue what Emma believed about really anything. I didn't know when she felt the ideal time was to get married, have sex, or even trivial things like when to buy an avocado. I mean, not that it particularly matters as long as it's not overripe or extraordinarily under-ripe, but still. I think the same ripeness scale might apply to our nonexistent sex life.

"I'll probably push that conversation off until I have the stones to actually ask her to be my girlfriend."

"Yeah, you need stones to bang. Good point," he said.

After we got done with the game and the pizza, we both said our goodbyes. It was late when I got home, so I went straight upstairs. My mind was too busy with other things for homework, so I decided to set an early alarm that I knew I wasn't going to wake up for and call it good.