viii. broken lives

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  SHE WOKE UP ON THE COUCH AND groaned from the bright lights and the pain coming from her forehead

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  SHE WOKE UP ON THE COUCH AND groaned from the bright lights and the pain coming from her forehead. She goes to touch it but is blocked by a bloody bandage that's wrapped around her injured head.

  "Hey, Ru-Ru," Dina gently voiced, sitting beside her as she patted the woman's ankle. She helped her sit up when she struggled, looking her over for any signs of discomfort. Rue glanced over her face which had fresh cuts and scratches, too; she could feel and see one eye was swollen unlike the other.

  Rue coughed from her dry throat as she failed to speak on her first attempt. When she succeeded, her voice was strained. "How long was I out?"

  "Half an hour."

"What the fuck happened?"

  Dina sighed as she handed her the rest of the water from her canister. "Abby was here and... things didn't... go so well."

  Those words caused alarms in Rue's head to go off in urgency after she took a couple of gulps of water, speaking clearer than before. "Where's Ellie?" she quickly asked.

  "She's up with Tommy, helping him deal with his eye."

Rue nodded before asking, "What about Jesse?"

  Her smile changed into a form of sadness that caused Rue to release a sorrowful croak from her throat, clenching her jaw. Her eyes drifted from Dina and onto a blood stain on the carpet.

  "I'm so sorry, D."

  Rue's eyes were lined with wet tears, begging to be poured out. A tear dropped from Dina's big brown eye and she wiped it away swiftly. She cried about ten rivers for her deceased loved one and she didn't want to another in front of anyone.

  "I'll go get her for you," she rose to her feet and scrambled away.

  Rue deeply inhaled and exhaled to calm that feeling that slowly crept in - but she couldn't help but to feel some sort of guilt. This grief she felt over a friend wasn't anything new, but it still pained her.

  The sound of footsteps rushing down the stairs caught her attention. The woman looked stressed. Her nose was broken and it was slightly tainted a purple shade with red splatters. She could tell Ellie tried to wipe off all the blood that had dried - although some spots were worse than others.

  "Rue..." her voice was barely above a whisper as her hand gripped the threshold. A frown slowly began to form.

  She used all her strength to push herself up by pressing her hands into the couch, but the pain in her shoulder threw her back down as she winced in pain.

  "Hey, take it easy. I'm here," the green-eyed lady took a seat next to her - being glued to her side like she was before she went to aid Tommy. Her worrisome eyes rushed over her damaged physique as she shook her head, then they began to fill with water as her bottom lip quivered.

  "I'm sorry, Rue. I didn't want this to happen. She just... fucking came out of nowhere and she caught Tommy and then shot Jesse—"

  "Hey, hey, it's okay," she put a hand on her knee to calm her - and she did, "None of this was your fault, okay?"

  She wanted to believe it. She wanted to. If she would've came to Seattle alone and made things quick no one would've been hurt or... dead.

  "I could've stopped her. I should've stopped her. I just..." she sighs, a tear rolling down her cheek. "I don't know," her voice crumbled.

  Rue's eyebrows were sewn together and her eyes lingered on her before she grew the urge to reach up and wipe the tear away, then she groaned at her wound once again, feeling her head pound against her skull.

  "Let me clean that," Ellie said as she dug in the medical kit beside her feet. The wound was cleaned not even thirty minutes ago, but she didn't want her to be in any more pain. Her dominant arm was stiff after popping it back into place, using it to wipe the skin and stopping every so often when she flinched.

  "How bad does this feel?"

  "Well, I'm not dead..." she tittered, fully aware that it was an inappropriate time to make jokes, "What doesn't kill you makes you stronger, I guess."

  Ellie admired her ability to make light out of the darkness, but she doubted she would be able to if she saw the sight Ellie had seen. Seeing Abby repeatedly smash her head into the ground until Dina got involved. If Dina didn't get there in time... she wouldn't have known what to do.

  The pain of almost losing her was too much to bare. Her frown grew bigger when she realized her thumb was gently stroking over the minimal smiley-face tattoo on Rue's forearm.

  When her head was tilted, Rue examined the crook in her nose among the other small injuries on her face. She brought her hand to her chin and uplifted her face, wiping that single tear with her thumb. That saddened frown disappeared and merely turned upside-down.

Ellie hesitated for a moment before leaning forward and burying her face in Rue's unhurt shoulder. Rue wrapped that arm around Ellie tightly, holding her. They stayed like that for a long time.




  Later that day the burial of Jesse happened. Their quiet voices were overrun by the rain and the sniffles from all four of them. They were set to make their way back to Jackson after a couple of days of rest, especially with Tommy being handicapped.

  Her eyes, which were full of emotion, stayed in the same spot, looking at the lump of dirt in the ground with a J made out of pulled grass. It was an awful thing to be killed in a city someone despised. She couldn't imagine telling his mother, Robin. What would she think? What if-

  "Rue?" Ellie placed a gentle hand on her shoulder, looking at her troubled face with sympathy. She wrapped it around her to pull her away.

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