We'll carry on ( Ferard, frerard fan fiction )

||Chapter Nine||

||SONG||- hospital for souls- Bring me The Horizon
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*Franks POV*

If I never mentioned it before, I have severe depression. I get in these depressed moods where I want to just cut so deep and not stop. all of this kind of stopped when I met Gee, but he was gone for a couple of days due to a funeral for one of his old friends.

He was only gone for three days, but in those three days, I became depressed again, thinking once he got back he would want nothing to do with me.

I finally burst into tears, I felt like shit, pure shit.

I walked to the dollar store and stole a blade from a pack of five, and got a pack of beer. The cashier was a friend of mine, and he let me buy it.

I walked back home and went upstairs into Gerard and I's room, not realizing that Gerard would be home in an hour, I drank 5 of the 6 beers and went into the bathroom. I grabbed the blade out of my pocket and started off slow, over the skin of my wrist. I slowly began to escalate and slice deeper, blood all over the sink.

"Frankie? Babe are you in here?" Gerard said walking into our room.

Shit

"There you are!" He said my back facing towards him.

He walked over to me and turned me around.

"Frank..." He said softly.

"Gee I- I'm s-so-sorr-y," I cried out bursting into tears holding out my wrists, my sleeves covering the Crimson cuts.

He pulled me into a hug as I cried into his shirt, him rubbing my back.

"Frank what's wrong?" he asked quietly

"you hate m-e-e." I said sobbing and screaming into his shirt

"Hey calm down okay?" He said as he ran his fingers through my hair, kissing me head."I don't hate you baby, why would you ever think that?"

"Because you do." I said, my head still buried in his shirt, holding my shaking wrists in between us.

He looked at me slightly pulling away, and kissed me, the kiss seeming like he had missed me. No, why would he miss me, he hates my guts. Wait, if he hates me, why is he kissing me?

He pulled away,"Frankie? Why do you taste like Sam Adams?" He said with a concerned look.

I felt tears fill my eyes as I began to sniff, gesturing towards the empty bottles, next to my blade.

Crap, I had been holding my wrists away this whole time hoping he wouldn't notice, and he has the blade in plain sight.

He looked at the bottles and back at me, pulling my sleeves up my arm.

"Baby..." He said tears filling his eyes, right before kissing both of my wrists, and pulling me into another hug.

"Frankie I don't hate you, I never will, just promise me you won't ever do this again, you don't deserve this." I could hear his voice crack, sounding like he was about to cry.

He pulled off, slipping a ring with an infinity sign engraved into it on my finger,"Please promise me that." he said showing me his ring.

"I promise..." I said shyly smiling, shaking as he led me to the couch and pulled me on top of him.

"I love you so much," he said playing with my lip ring before kissing it.

"I love you too..." I said quietly as he covered us with a blanket, and we fell asleep.