Halfway to Love

Chapter 3

That's when I noticed the three figures huddled at the other end of the room. The small one was sat on the window seat hugging a pillow with tears running down their face and the other two are trying to comfort them. They seem to sense our gazes because they all look at us. The small one drops the pillow and runs full speed at Daniel, jumping into his arms while whimpering a quiet 'daddy' as they cry whole-heartedly.

"We will be back shortly. You three get to know each other."

Daniel carries the crying bean back out of the room, and I look over at the other two.

"Yall fuck right? I'm not reading this wrong, am I?'

Lewis chuckles again. He seems to be the carefree one.

"It's more then that but yes. And don't think you are forced to join because you aren't. But the offer is there. When Mister said that there was a possibility of a new arrival, he asked us all first. But this is a conversation for a later date, when you are 18. My name is Lewis, this is Slater and the little bean that who ran away is River."

I nod,

"You could give Daniel a run for his money with the monologues."

Slaters deep voice reverberates around the room,

"Don't talk about Sir like that."

I huff. A little, a submissive and a slave. I don't fit into this dynamic at all. After a shrug I walk around the sofa bit and step down before throwing myself into one of the corners.

"How long have you both been here?"

Lewis jumps over the top of the sofa and lands in the other corner, honestly the best seats, and Slater walks around like I did. Sitting close to Lewis but not touching him.

"Slater here was the first one, he's been here for 7 years. He's not that much younger than Mister and he came here like you, just a few weeks before his 18th. I've been here 5 years. I arrived when I was 16. River came the year after me and was 15 when they got here. They are non-binary by the way."

"Thanks for telling him our business".

Slater almost growls out before he gets up and leaves.

"Sorry about him. It took him a while to warm up to each of us. He has a much darker past then River or I."

I shrug and close my eyes before leaning back into the sofa,

"It's fine. I'm used to being unwanted."

Lewis makes a noise likes he's going to say something but shuffling interrupts him as River and Daniel walk back into the room. River sits close to me but doesn't touch me this time, I'm guessing Daniel has told them I don't like being touched. Without opening my eyes, I turn my head towards the side of the sofa that Lewis is sat at, having heard footsteps that side of the room,

"Do I have to call you a title too or can I just call you Daniel? I'm not the submissive type."

River gasps and looks at Lewis,

"You told him?"

"Nope. He guessed."

The p pops as he says it. I hear Daniel release the breath he was holding.

"You can call me Daniel. How did you know I was over here?"

"Trauma will do that to a person. I know who's home by the way they close the door. Or if I'm going to get hit when the footsteps stop outside my door. Or if my mother has had one drink or five by how she walks up the stairs."

Slater's voice fills the room from behind me,

"Or if you know that you will have to clean blood and cum off the sheets in the morning."

I smirk,

"See you get it Boo."

I hear sniffles again and open my eyes to see River crying again. I frown,

"I'm sorry River. I forget sometimes that just because I'm numb to my trauma it doesn't mean that everyone is. I didn't mean to upset you again.'

I lift my arm and hesitate slightly before putting on the sofa behind them. After a few more seconds I angle my body towards them,

"You are meant to hug me back idiot."

A cracked giggle sounds from the bundle of oversized clothes next to me before they crawl into my lap. This was a little closer than I intended but they seem to relax instantly so I don't say anything. Daniel catches my eye and rolls his shoulder in an exaggerated way to indicate that I should breathe. So, I keep staring at him and breathing until I felt a trail of wet run down my check. Lewis must have seen because he pulled River off me and into his arms.

Daniel grabs my arm by my sleeve, not actually touching me and leads me out of the room. He walks back down the hallway and out the back door that I hadn't noticed was in the kitchen. Once we get outside, he lets go of my arm and I crumble to my knees. I feel pressure building in my chest and all I want to do is scream. So, I do. I scream and scream. I scream because of my sister. I scream because of what my dad did to me. I scream because my mum didn't keep me safe like she was meant to.

The pain is replaced by anger. Anger at the truck driver, anger at my parents. Anger at myself. I don't realise I'm beating the floor with my fist till strong arms circle me. They pull my hands to my chest and lock me in a crushing grip. It's unfair that I lost my love for touch. That I can't even handle someone hugging me. Its not until my vision starts going black that I realised just how much of myself I really lost when my sister died.