Supernova Souls - Ryan Upchurch

-47-

"I don't feel good." Delilah's voice is nothing more than a raspy mumble when she speaks. She's curled up in the passenger seat of her best friend's old Caprice, dressed in one of the loose hoodie she brought and a pair of black leggings and a Tennessee Volunteers hat backwards on her head. Tears stained her pale cheeks in white trails and her hazel eyes were red and puffy from crying most of the night. Slept evaded her for most of the night, only allowing her to slip away into the welcoming darkness for an hour or two at a time and while she was awake, she was scared. Scared of what could go wrong in the near future.

She worried and worried, and cried and cried.

"Why?"

"Well, for starters I might be knocked up by a man I'm not even married to yet, and I've been throwing my guts up all morning, I have a headache, my stomach hurts and so do my feet."

"You're gonna be fine." Acadia reached out to turn down the radio as she turned the steering wheel sharply, one-handed to pull into the deserted parking lot. Only one other car was there, tucked away in a shadowed corner beneath a tall, baren tree. "Plus, he is your boyfriend. It's not like he was a shady one night stand at a greasy old bar." She chose the spot closest to the building and put the car in park, shifting and twisting in her seat to grab her heavy black purse from the backseat. She turned back towards the steering wheel with her brick-sized purse on her lap, zipper wide open.

"Am I though?" Her head cocked to the side slightly, tone somewhat teasing. Delilah moved to sit up straight in the seat, planting her feet firmly on the floorboard. She took her hands out of her front hoodie pocket. "And yeah, I guess it could've been worse.."

"Yes, you are. See?" Cadi grabbed her wallet from her purse then shoved it under the backseat, then draped a stray, fraying navy blue blanket laying on the seat over the edge to hide her purse. "Now, let's go. And please stop actin' like a hormonal teenager." She earned a playful nudge in the arm for the last part, but then they both got out of the car and walked up to the big glass double doors.

Delilah felt nauseous while they made their way to the aisle that held the pregnancy tests, but this time it wasn't morning sickness. It was overbearing worry and a little spark of excitement making her feel that way.

Ethan couldn't go with the two girls because he had to work until late that night and he also really didn't want to go. Acadia and Delilah dropped him off before they left for the store.

"Please Lord, don't let this test be positive." Delilah whispered underneath her breath as she picked up a few tests and clutched them all tightly in her hand. Her legs felt like jello walking up to the self checkout, and she felt queasy just looking down at the tests in her hands as she swiped them and stuck them in a bag. She paid, and back to the house they went.

—
With a stomach queasy from anxiousness, Delilah stood with her back pressed against the wall by the bathroom sink, eyes screwed shut while she dug her nails into the palm of her hand so hard the bite of the pain temporarily made her focus on something besides the one (or two) lines that would decide her fate. She was grateful for that little sliver of pain and the numbness that followed. "Please, please Lord. I can't take care of a baby right now, I don't have the free time- or, or the money.. please, let the test be negative."

When she opened her eyes, she looked down at the test sitting on the edge of the sink. At first, she thought her eyes were playing tricks on her. But no, there it sat, two pale pink lines on it staring right back up at her. She felt like she couldn't breathe. Like a noose was wrapped around her throat, squeezing so tight she lost oxygen. Her vision became blurry, stricken with tears she tried to blink back. That battle failed, and they slipped down her cheeks like raindrops on a car window.

"No." She whispered to herself, voice hoarse, taking a step closer to the sink so she was staring directly down at it. "No, no, no, no!"

She picked it up carefully. "It has to be a false positive. Those happen, right? They have to. It has to be wrong." Oddly enough, talking to herself seemed to sort of help ease the anxiety bubbling up inside of her. At least someone was listening to her panicked rambling. Her stomach twisted and she stared down at those two pink lines like they had just murdered her entire family.

The positive pregnancy test made a clinking sound against the white porcelain when it hit the sink. The bag on the floor rattled when Delilah reached for the second test, hoping it'd confirm her hope about the first one being wrong. She took it and then waited, but when she looked down she was met with two more pink lines, further confirming she is indeed, pregnant.

Her shaky hand turned the doorknob, and she looked towards the black haired girl sitting on the bed that's temporarily hers. "Cadi? Come here. Please." She said, dropping her arms to her sides.

"What'd it say?" Acadia asks, following Delilah into the bathroom. The door shut behind them, and Delilah pointed to the two positive tests on the edge of the sink. Acadia stared at them for a long moment then looked back up at Delilah.

"You're pregnant!" Her amber eyes glowed with happiness that soon faded when the look on her best friend's face registered inside her mind. She wasn't happy. Nowhere near it.

"Yeah.." Delilah ran her hand up and down her other hoodie covered arm, bunching up the fabric then smoothing it back down. Her eyes were swimming with tears and she looked exhausted as hell, her colorful eyes drained and faded-looking. Dull. Splotches of purple laid underneath her beautiful eyes that currently lacked their usual glow. The woman that Acadia usually saw so happy and full of life now looked like a jaded shell of herself.

"Ain't ya happy?"

"Yeah." Delilah said. "But I'm worried, too."

"Why?"

"What if Ryan's not? What if he doesn't want our baby? Or me? What if he fires me because he can't stand to look at me or my stomach anymore? What- oh God. What's my dad gonna say? I'm pregnant, and," Delilah raised her bare ring finger, sparing it a quick annoyed glance. "I'm not married. He's gonna kill my ass dead because of this baby. Then he'll drag me back to life and kill me again!"

"Relax, okay?" Delilah nodded and took in a few deep breaths. Her hand didn't stop, but instead moved faster up and down her arm. The scars beneath those sleeves burned and itched. For a second, Delilah almost missed the sharp bite of glass digging into her pale skin. She shook the thought out of her head and mentally yelled at herself. When she got away from Colt, she made a promise to herself- a promise that she would never hurt herself or let anyone else do so again. "He still loves you, I promise you. He wouldn't do that to you, and if he does, call me because I'll murder his bitchass. Sam won't do nothin', in fact he's been askin' you for grand babies for years. He's gonna love that little kid more than life itself."

At that, Delilah laughed. It was obviously a faked one, made to hopefully lighten the man-made mood in the bathroom. "Alright. I know, I just- sometimes I overthink and shit like that pops up in my head and stresses me out."

Acadia didn't say a word, she only pulled Delilah in for a hug and neither of them let go for what felt like forever. Delilah savored the hug because she knew after this week they probably wouldn't see each other for months. Cadi did too.

The two girls spent the rest of the day binging their favorite shows on the couch, talking about whatever subjects they could think of and ate snacks until it was time to go pick Ethan up from work. When they got back, the three all cooked a big dinner and the girls brought up multiple year old drama and even got Ethan to join in and make fun of old highschool drama he wasn't even involved in. Overall, the day started out rocky but ended with hearts full of love and a good night's sleep.