19-PAST

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【JOSEPHINE】

I drop my towel. Turn back to Hero like I'm utterly unmoved by the way his tongue is sliding over his lips.

Fuck, the hungry look on his face is addicting.

I wish I could say that's why I've spent most of our two months together at the beach.

It's part of it.

But there's something about his place. This strange silence.

Don't get me wrong. There's plenty of noise at his house. The guy has four siblings. And whenever Mercy is around, she clings to us like peanut butter to jelly.

But there's something in the air. This uneasiness. It gets worse the longer we go without talking about Hero's late brother, the one who died nearly a year ago.

The reason for his perpetual frown.

We dance around the subject.

Sometimes we get close.

The other night, he spilled a lot of ugly details. Talked about coming home to his brother in a body bag.

It killed him, that he missed the signs. That he was too late. That he didn't understand.

He's been trying to understand for a long time. It's why he took Art History. Why he started reading those Star Wars books.

He's been trying to figure out why his brother Titan took his life.

My heart broke for Hero.

It still does.

But, right now...

It's a beautiful summer day.

It's hard to believe anything in the world is ugly.

There's so much behind those soulful green eyes. I know there is.

But it can wait.

I can wait until he's ready to spill his guys.

He holds his hand up to block the sun. "You look amazing, baby."

"This old thing?" I twirl on my toes. Run my fingers over the straps of my bikini bottoms.

Really, it's nothing special. A white swimsuit I bought on sale at Old Navy.

The way he stares makes me feel like I'm wearing...

Well, I'd never actually wear anything designer.

But he still makes me feel like a million bucks.

I make a show of bending over to smooth my towel.

He lets out a low, appreciative groan. Digs the heels of his hands into the sand.

He's still wearing jeans and a t-shirt.

Hero isn't a fan of the beach—too busy, too crowded, too sandy—but he walks down the hill with me every day anyway.

"How can you not love it here?" I turn back to the water. Hold my hand over my eyes to block out the sun. My secondhand sunglasses aren't enough to temper the glare. But it's hard to find fault with anything at the moment.

Big yellow sun, azure water, bright blue sky, warm air... this is paradise.

Being with him is paradise.

Why didn't anyone tell me relationships felt this good?

Just looking at him, at that smile spreading over his cheeks. It's so...

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