Lonesome or Adoption (book 1)

Part 13 *edited*

Carter p.o.v

Mitch and I just sit there, in each other's arms, staring at each other. He doesn't know what to say and neither do I. I told him that my dreams where about him. I didn't tell him if they were good or bad though.

I can see that his eyes are filled with tears and that he is fight his hardest to not let them fall.

"W-what a-are they a-about" he stammers out again. I have to tell him I have to tell him how I feel. and the dreams but I cant. but I have too. while my brain is arguing with its self i tell him.

"They are about you, Mitch. I keep having the because I really like you. and I have these dreams that have awesome things happening in them with me and you. then I wake up happening because I know that they will never h-happen." My voice starts to choke up.

"Car-" he tries to speak.

"I'm sorry Mitch." I get up from the couch and quietly walk passed Jerome, up the stairs and into my bed room.

I fall on my bed and face first into my pillows. quiet sobs are muffled by my pillows.

I don't know if I love him or not. But one thing I know a fact of is that I do have strong feelings for him. I feel like a weight has lifted off my chest now that he knows how I feel, but now that he knows how I feel, I wonder how he is going to act around me now. whether he is going to be the same Mitch he has been or will he try to avoid talking to me along with avoiding all contact with me. More quiet sobs are muffled by my pillows. I lift my head up to see that my light blue pillow has large wet spot from my tears.

Laying on my back I cover my face with my hands. I try to make my sobs as quiet as possible but the more I think about making them quiet, the more I think about why I am crying and then it just starts all over again.

The wooden floor outside my door creaks.

"M-Mitch?" I breath out.

No one answers. I just roll onto my side, curl up in a ball with my hands still covering my face and I continue sobbing and crying. gasping for air after every few sobs.

Running out of energy to cry anymore I fell right to sleep.

Mitch p.o.v

"I'm sorry Mitch." Carter says with her voice breaking. she gets off the couch (and from cuddling me) and she walks away. I feel like I just let her go. like I had her in my grasp and that I let go. I feel guilty. my chest hurts and i get a head ache.

"Stupid" I whisper to my self.

I look at Jerome. he is asleep. he doesn't understand what I'm going through and I can't tell him. he will kill me. he will probably kick me out of the house. he won't want to be my best friend any more.

I look at the clock on the stereo "11:47pm" it reads.

I get up form the couch and tip toe up the stairs and to Carters door.

I glance inside the doorway, she is laying on her back with her hands covering her face and she is shaking. is she, she's crying. i lean my back against the wall next to her door, and slide to the floor, causing the floor to creak.

"M-Mitch?" She stops her sobs.

I didn't say anything. I didn't know what to say.

I here her bed creak and then her sobs continue for about 10 more minutes. and in that ten minutes I just sat outside her door feeling helpless. like the biggest price of shit. why didn't I see the sighs? The little smiles, her "but only for you" comment at the mall. how she got protective of my at hot topic, when she laced her hands with mine, how she hugs me, how she holds the hugs just a little bit longer then Jerome's hugs. I feel so blind.

Her sobs and gasps become quiet and her breathing is heavy. I stand up and peek inside her room again.

"Carter." I whisper. but no response. I assume she is sleeping. I slowly and quietly walk into her room and sit on the edge of bed on the opposite side from which she is sleeping. I look over my shoulder at her. I notice her sides, how the expand and then get smaller in size again. her breathing is normal.

I pull the blankets over her and then I slip under the covers with her. I wrap my arm around her waist and I put the other one under her head. she scoots back closer to me and cuddles closer to me. her body fits perfectly next to mine. I fall right to sleep with her in my arms.