His Vice

21

"Tell me again why we have to do this?" she rolled her eyes, pulling the chair into the bathroom over the towel she had already placed on the floor.

"Because Max, in the eyes of these people, we are a middle-class happy family. We don't want to arouse suspicion that were anything else by refusing to go" she lead him to sit down in the chair, facing the bathroom mirror.

"Ok, and why do you have to cut my hair?" he asked incredulously.

"Well Max, I don't know if anyone has ever told you this, but this shaggy over your eyes makes you look a little...-" he raised an eyebrow "makes you look a little...scary" he rolled his eyes

"what's wrong with scary? I'm a fucking gang leader! why can't I look scary?!"

"Because middle-class businessmen don't look scary Max! they look boring!" she responded, picking up the scissors and a comb from the bathroom counter.

"Wait-" he grabbed ahold of her wrist of the hand holding the scissors "Have you done this before?"

"Of course I have" she responded stiffly.

"Oh ya? when have you done this before?" he asked. She looked away slightly, muttering her answer "What? I didn't hear that?"

"Ninth-grade cosmetology class," she said. He stared at her reflection in the mirror for a few moments.

"You haven't done this since you were fifteen?" he asked incredulously

"Don't be such a baby" she responded, pulling a brush through his hair. "I'm sorry that I didn't finish high school, there were other things on my mind!" she retorted

"Harmony, I love you more than I love oxygen, but I don't think you can cut hair" she rolled her eyes.

"I knew you were going to do this-" she claimed, reaching into her pocket "That's why I brought these" she grabbed his wrist leaning against the armrest of the chair, and before he could even pull away, she had already hooked up the zip tie, tightening it around his wrist and the arm of the chair.

"Where did you find zip ties?!" he asked, fighting against his restraints

"They were in the garage. Interestingly, there are a lot of things that could be used to restrain someone in there" she responded, leaning down by his feet to strap his ankles to the front chair legs. She pulled away happily at her work, feeling empowered that she could restrain someone so much bigger than her. "Now-" she got up behind him grabbing the scissors and the comb once again. He looked at her in the mirror, almost looking scared as she held up her weapons of choice. "Let's get this done"

-

She sat on the bed, looking up when the bathroom door opened. She gasped happily, clapping her hands when he came out, nicely dressed in a pair of dress pants and the white shirt Bean had brought over, which slightly sagged over his frame.

"Why is it so loose?" he asked, pulling uncomfortably at the sleeve cuffs.

"Because Max, middle class 9 to 5 boring dads don't have time to go to the gym to have an eight pack" she responded, getting up from the bed, helping him with the cuffs. "And now, one last thing" she held up the small container of foundation. He raised an eyebrow, looking down at her as she screwed it open.

"You're covering my tattoos?"

"it's the last thing that makes you look like you're a criminal" she responded, grabbing his hand, starting to lather the stuff across the tattoos of his fingers, working up to the back of his hand and his wrist.

"Great, you've officially turned me into a boring divorce" she smiled.

"Guys!" She could hear from the bedroom, as Bean hurried up the stairs. She appeared in the doorway, Maxxy cooing in her arms. "Maxxy is ready" Harmony gashed happily, staring at the small dress shirt and pants, with little shiny shoes. She felt her heart melt, placing down the foundation and taking her son from Bean's arms, looking at the small happy baby.

"So handsome," she said as the baby giggled "My handsome baby boy" she lifted him up, blowing a raspberry on his tummy and making the child laugh, grabbing at her hair. Bean glanced at Maxwell, looking him up and down, raising an eyebrow. Max noticed, huffing, crossing his arms across his chest.

"You sure look different Mr. Satan" she claimed, teasingly "You look more like Mr. Masturbation now"

"Bean!" Harmony claimed incredulously, covering Maxxy's ears.

"What?!" Bean asked "just telling the truth. He may be still good looking, but he looks like that office worker that sits in his car in the driveway after work, masturbating to porn before he goes into the house to greet his wife that hasn't given him sex for months and he's too afraid to ask for it"

"It's the hair, isn't it?" Max asked

"Quiet! both of you!" Harmony snipped, grabbing Max's pants to tuck the dress shirt into his waistband. "We are going to look like the average family, nothing to hide. Especially not seem like a killer gang leader with the girl he kidnapped and the son he impregnated her with and their security detail because another gang is trying to kill them, alright?" the room stayed silent, and Harmony finished tucking, letting out a sigh. "Sometimes, I just wish I could be normal"

"Well, good luck with that" Bean muttered, heading out of the room. Harmony groaned, heading for her closet, trying to pick out a dress that looked as innocent as she did, the average housewife.

"Relax Harmony" Max came up behind her, placing his hands over her tense shoulders "Yes, we're not the average family, but we're still a family nonetheless right?" she turned, gazing up at him. She nodded "If this will make you happy, I'll do it"

"Thank you" she breathed, hugging him tightly around the waist, pressing her head on the shirt that did nothing to hide the sound of his heartbeat from her ears. She sighed happily, pulling away quickly, adjusting his shirt on his chest. "You look handsome too," she said, smiling at him "Don't let any of those housewives steal you away from me"

"Never in a million years My Love" he responded, taking her cheeks into his hands "Your the only girl for me" she made a happy noise from her lips, leaning into his touch.

"I'm more handsome than the baby though, right?" she laughed, shaking from his hold.

"Sorry, even now, I can tell Maxxy is going to be better looking than you when he grows up. You're out of luck"

"Fuck" he muttered, making her laugh, turning back to grab a nice dark blue dress from her wardrobe, a pair of socks, and a bra. "You know, that applies to you too," he said as they left the closet. She placed the clothes on the bed, turning to face him.

"What does?"

"The whole 'don't let them steal you away' thing, that applies to you to" she snorted, rolling her eyes

"Like that could ever happen" she responded. But, he had to admit, watching her change in the soft blue dress, staring as she looked in the mirror, clipping a small white barrette into her hair, he was worried. He knew full well what Harmony's dream was, to live a life of normal, average bliss. And now, getting the chance to dress and act, pretend like that's what they were. It made him uneasy. And what made him even more so, is that the other husbands at this function could give Harmony exactly what she wanted, the life of simplicity, which was the one thing that He couldn't give her. He wondered if with that life, if they could make her happier than she could ever be with him, forced into this upside-down version of existence. Maxwell could give her everything, everything except the one thing she longed for. And, it crushed him.