3rd book the Devil May Care Series
Remember Lucas King? The suicidal kid who can barely stand to get up in the morning because he's just that tired of life? Lucas has struggled with depression since he was just a kid, always feeling like he was neve...
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My hair has grown.
I stare into the mirror and look at my reflection. I look the same but different. My eyes that use to hollow now shine with emotions I couldn't once comprehend and though they're no where near happy. I'm proud of the fact that at least there's a piece of me that is still human, a part of me that can still feel something when I thought I couldn't anymore.
My eyes go back to my hair that have grown above my shoulders and I swallow thickly because though I know how to cut my own hair, it's Lucas who i've gotten use to that usually does it for me. When I cut my hair, it's because I feel the need to protect myself but when he does it, I feel beautiful. I feel safe—lighter.
I haven't spoken to Lucas or even seen him, I reached out he hasn't responded to any of my calls and texts. Yes, I was still angry but I didn't want to stay angry. I missed him and now I realize how he must feel when I don't talk to him, he grows a bit grumpy which is normal but it always manages to make me smile.
I watch the small smile grow on my face as I think of all of our moments together.
"Astraea?" I hear a knock on the door and instantly look away from the mirror. Milan calls out and I debate on answering, things have been tense between me and Milan. "You okay?" I open the door, instantly meeting his dark eyes. "The doors, Astraea. You know you aren't allowed to lock them, at least not right now."
I only nod, "Have you heard from Lucas?"
"Yeah," His brows crease, "I was just on the phone with him."
Hurt crawls into the deepest corners of my chest, "Just wondering." Is he mad at me? What did I do? Why didn't he want to talk to me? "Is he okay?"
He smiles, "Yeah, he's doing okay."
I stare at him for a long second as I force myself not to get upset. Why the fuck was he talking to Milan but not me? That fucking asshole. "Can I use your phone?" I ask and Milan's brows shoot up, "Give me."
He hands it over and I search through his phone for Lucas's number before hitting the green call button. Lucas answers on the third ring, "Why are you bothering me again?" He asks, his voice groggy as if waking up from a nap.
"Oh, no reason." He inhales sharply at the sound of my voice, "I'm just trying to figure out why your ignoring me."
"I'm not ignoring you." He responds back quietly.
I stare at the drawings on the fridge, "Tell me why." I ignore him, knowing he's lying.
"I don't think we should see each other anymore." He sighs, "You need to see somebody, you're not mentally ready for a relationship." He talks in that soft tone as if trying to calm the awaiting reaction, "And neither am I."
