Our Sweet Mistake

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Rhian's POV


"I have a confession to make ... I love you, Rhian..."

I know there is a "but" coming... I can't blame her because hindi talaga kami pwede.

First and foremost and for God sake, Rhian, you have a boyfriend. Hindi mo man lang s'ya naisip nang ipinagtapat mo kay Glaiza yan nararamdaman mo!

"but... it's not easy."

What? Sa lahat na pwede n'yang sabihin. Sa lahat na pwede kong marinig, why yun pa?

"It's not easy, I know. I have a boyfriend. We are in this complicated world of show business. There are so much expectations coming from the public, our family and our network. In short, hindi tayo pwede."

There, I made my conclusion. Because, I finally realize how stupid I am, why did I even bother to tell her. But I was hoping na sana, pwede.

"Do you love him?"

Do I love him? I sat up and I try to search for her face which hindi naman mahirap because of our position.

"Yes, I do love him..."

She tried to stand up but I was quick to catch her arms. Hinila ko s'ya pabalik sa bed. I hugged her. I want her to understand.

"What else do you want, Rhi? You made it clear that you love him. Correct me if I'm wrong but I heard a present tense."

I smiled. English lesson pa talaga kami.

"Yes, I said it in present tense. I love him, but I did not say I am in love with him."

"What's your point? To be honest, as much as gusto kong maging tayo, na makasama ka, na-gi-guilty na rin ako. Why did I even bother to ask you that question? Masasaktan lang ako."

"Tell me what you want me to do. If I need to break up with him, gagawin ko. I love you that much, Glaiz."

"How could you say that! How could you say that you love me, it's only been days na magkasama tayo. Anong nangyari?"

"Are you even listening to me?"

So she didn't get it. "So ano lang yung sinabi ko kanina? Wala lang yun? Tumagos lang yun sa tenga mo?"

I wanted to cry again. Nakakapagod na but I know pareho kaming nagugulohan.

"It's only been two weeks, but I love you like I have known you all my life. Sa unang tingin mo palang, binago mo ako."

Then I started to cry again. And tanga tanga ko!

"Kung pwede lang pigilan to! Kung pwede lang na baguhin ko ang nararamdaman ko!"

I was crying so hard, my body begun to shake uncontrollably. "Sana-sana hindi ka nalang dumating sa buhay ko"

I was at the end of my emotional rope. I don't want to explain anymore. I just cried. Maybe if I cried hard enough, I could cry my heart out. And if I had no heart left, my tears would stop falling.

"Sshhhhh tama na. Please, wag ka nang umiyak," Sumandal s'ya sa headboard ng bed, pulled me closer and embraced me.

I'm so tired. Wala na akong energy para mag resist, so I lean on her and allow her to hold me.

"Wag ka nang umiyak. Mahal na mahal kita. I know masyado tayong mabilis but just as you said, I love you like I have known you all my life."

I like, no...I love being like this. Cuddled by the person that actually makes me feel complete. She might not have a strong frame to support me, unlike Jase who could enclosed my whole body with his arms, kakaibang security itong nararamdaman ko habang yakap ako ni Glaiza.

"Mahal na mahal kita, Glaiz. From now on, I don't want to love anybody but you. Akala ko mawawala itong nararamdaman ko if I look for someone else. Pero I'm wrong!"

She tighten her embrace and place her head at the crook of my neck. Her breath is sending chills all over my body.

God, I want to stay like this forever.

"It's not easy, uulitin ko but come hell or high water ipaglalaban kita."

I disentangled myself from our embrace although my body screamed not to. But I need to do this.

For once in my life, I want to do what feels right.

Humarap ako sa kanya.

"I need to kiss you."

It seems like my eyes are now well adjusted to the darkness and I can see her. She was shocked but she straighten up and our eyes locked. I resolved, no force on Earth could pulled me out of these deep abyss of love.

I moved my face closer, closer until our forehead touched. Her scent is enough to lock me in place. It's intoxicating. And the rush of air every time she breathe pulls me in closer.

Finally, in perfect sync, we closed our eyes. Then, I just lost it. I think I forgot everything, I forgot my name, when a warm, wet sensation touches my lips.

It's like some sort of current glues me into that sensation. I don't know for how long, but I think time has stopped!

Slowly, I parted my lips but to my disappointment the source of my bliss is gone.

And I finally realize, I did ask for this.

I open my eyes and I see her smiling at me. The most wonderful smile I have ever seen.

"God, you're so beautiful." I caressed her face with my left hand, but she took it instead and planted a kiss on my knuckles.

"Thank you." She pulled me into another hug. This time its light, noninvasive but full of promise. "I heart you."

"Jologs na I love you?"

"Jologs naman talaga kapag inlove di'ba?"

"So you're inlove with me, Glaiza de Castro?"

"Since the day I first lay my eyes on you, Rhian Ramos."

And we both fall into a fit of laughter. Then, she cupped my face with her both hands. And planted a kiss on my forehead.

"As much as I wanted us to be together, we could not make this official."

I understand.

"I know, Babe. It's enough for me na alam mo ang nararamdaman ko. It's enough na naging totoo tayo sa isa't isa. I'm still in a relationship. But I promise, I will tell Jase as soon a possible. I care for him, but I love you and I'm head over heels in love with you."

We adjusted ourselves to lay on the bed. In the most sensual way, I turned by back to her and she hugged me from behind.

"Let's get some sleep. We'll talk some more tomorrow. I know you are exhausted, Love-love."

"I slowly turned my head to acknowledge her. "Love-love, another endearment for Jathea?"

"No....for Rastro" and she smiled and gave me a small peck on my cheek.

"You never fail to amaze me. I heart you, Love-love"

"I heart you, more Love-love."

My eyes felt heavy, and for the first time in my life I surrender to sleep not from the lull of my playlist but from the sound of the heart beat of the woman I love.



To be continued ...


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