𝐫𝐢𝐩𝐩𝐥𝐞 𝐞𝐟𝐟𝐞𝐜𝐭 || baxter radic

17.

◈ 𝒃𝒂𝒙'𝒔 𝒑𝒐𝒗 ◈

"Baxter, you are one big idiot." She cups my face in her hands. She so easily forgives me. A part of me wishes she wouldn't. I deserved to live in agony for a little while. I had fucked up, big time. I made a miscalculation—a mistake. I couldn't let this happen again.

If I wanted to stay true to myself, I needed to stay away from Summer. All of this made me realize that losing May wasn't something I could deal with. My life had become better the moment she stepped in by my side.

I guess today happened because I needed to close the chapter. I needed to reset mentally to be able to focus on a better life. A life where I wasn't always put down and told I'm never good enough. It was hard to get used to being uplifted and told I am better than I see myself. But I was ready to accept that this how life was going to be. Everyone deserves to feel happy.

"I'm working on that." I smile at her, dropping my forehead on hers. "No more crying, please?" I reach up and run my thumb along her still red cheeks.

"What if I stub my toe?" She giggles. The redness slowly drifting the longer she's in my grasp—my skin touching hers. It's almost as if I'm soaking her sadness into my skin and burying it deep down inside of me. It's well deserves to have it simmer inside me, not her. I caused it. She should be able to let it go. I should have to hold onto it forever.

"Still no crying. I'll kiss it better." I smile kindly at her, so infatuated with the calm she brings into my life. Even with all the drama in the madness, the way she softens, makes my worries drift away in the water.

"You foot fetish freak!" She pushes herself away from me, but I pull her right back not ready to let go yet. She's laughing in my arms like her tears are distant memories.

There's a light in her eyes that shines when she's laughing. Her cheeks lift, her eyes scrunch, and a shine twinkles in her eyes. The happiness it brings radiates like heat from a fire. It's infectious. Her laugh pulls you in and sweeps you off your feet. She's transcendent when she's blissfully herself.

"Baxxy?" She calms her laugh, a smile still lingering in her lips as she calls my name.

"Maybelle." My eyes link to hers, waiting for whatever question she has brewing.

"I still trust you." Her fingers reach for mine, her eyes drifting down between us. "Do you think that maybe, you could stay? I don't really want to be alone tonight." Her fingertips tap against the tips of mine. A pattern she's developed. One I've memorized as being her release of nerves. Index, ring, ring, middle, pinky.

"Whatever you want, I'm here." I place a soft kiss to her lips.

I wake to the sound of screams. I'm on the floor laying next to May's bed, my eyes pinging opened to the shrieking sound. I sit up quickly and see May, screaming at the top of her lungs. Sweaty hair is clung to her forehead, she's vividly experiencing something, but she's definitely not awake.

I shake her. Her eyes fly open, the screams ending instantly. I pull the wet strands of hair from her face, pressing them back off her skin. "I'm here babe, I'm here." She falls into my arms, her breaths staggering as I hold her.

She's silent as she slowly wakes herself from her nightmare. I don't know what else to do but hold and tell her I'm here. I've never been put in this situation before. I don't know how I'm supposed to react.