I Broke The Girl I Loved

It's Horrible to Think This Way

(Back to Jayce's POV)

Aydrian's hand left my chin as soon as she heard her name. I internally grumbled at the idiot who yelled, wishing her hand was still providing warmth to my face. The guy I recognized as Kevin seemed to be fuming when he approached us. He began harshly whispering in Aydrian's face and though I was so close I could not hear what he was saying. From what I could see, Aydrian looked calm but you could tell by the way her shoulders slumped and how closely she held her books to her chest that she was scared. Kevin took no notice to this and continued his rant.

I stood dumbfounded as I watched what was going down. Few words came out of Aydrian's mouth but it would have been better if she had just stayed quiet because whatever she said set off Kevin. He stepped closer to her and she backed up as far as she could before her back made contact with her locker. His hand was twitching and I didn't even want to think about what he was going to do. I snapped out of my frozen state and pushed him off her.

"Can't you see you're scaring her?" I questioned defensively as I stood in front of Aydrian.

"Oh god, Aydrian please tell me this isn't the guy you've been spending your time with," Kevin said.

"So what if I am?" I asked back.

He kept ignoring me and directed all his responses towards Aydrian. "Him over me?! Aydrian, he'll hurt you. He's no good."

"I don't care," Aydrian meekly whispered.

Kevin wasn't having it but by now people were crowding around us and it was clear that he didn't want to escalate the scene any further. Smart boy. He grumbled and stomped off, like a toddler might I add, in the opposite direction. I turned around to face Aydrian who was staring at the floor.

"Aydrian? Hey, are you okay?" I asked, gently tilting her head up by her chin so that I could look into her eyes.

"I'm okay," she responded. "Thank you."

"I'm sorry I didn't react sooner," I apologized.

She shook her head. "Please don't apologize for anything. Thank you for stepping in at all."

I wanted to scoff but refrained from doing so, scared of upsetting her further. "You never have to thank me for being there for you. However you should thank Kevin for not doing anything too stupid because if he did I would've smashed his face into a locker."

At first her eyes slightly widened at what I said and I panicked, about to take it back, but then her lips broke into a smile and she laughed. I think she was laughing at the absurdity of my statement but whatever the reason was I loved it. She had such a nice laugh, one that made other people want to join in with her; one that drew attention in a good way; one that warmed my heart. When she finished laughing at me a permanent smile rested on her face.

"You're crazy," she told me, while shaking her head.

Without thinking I replied, "crazy for you."

Aydrian's smile grew bigger upon hearing those words and it was all I needed to smile with her. Everything about her is beautiful in every way but I think I love her eyes and her smile the most. The way she looks at me, at least the way she is looking at me now, with such admiration makes me want to do good for her always.

We stayed still for a moment, gazing into each others eyes and I wanted nothing more than to have this moment last forever. I wanted to get lost in the forests of her eyes, the different shades reminding me of the varying green trees on my bedroom wall, but alas the moment was ruined by the shrill sound of the bell. She jumped slightly and looked away, startled by the loud noise. It was adorable, the way her cheeks grew pink with embarrassment.

"I have to go to class," she spoke, as people weaved around and between us rushing to get to their classes.

I nodded and she smiled once more before turning on her heel and speed walking to her class. Luckily mine was not far from where we were standing so I was able to make it inside just on time. Though it wouldn't have matter if I was late to the class, or if I never went at all, because I wasn't paying attention anyways. The only thoughts in my mind revolved around Aydrian.

It felt like every second that I spent with her caused my body to want her more. She was beautiful the day I first met her and she just keeps getting prettier. Ever since moving here I've been so lonely. Aydrian has been here for me from the start and, not to sound like a jerk, but she's vulnerable and easy to get right now. After getting out of a relationship she's at her lowest and I could help her out of that the way she'll help me fill this void in my life. It's a win win situation, no feelings need to be involved, just physical attraction and someone to fill my free time in order to get me through the rest of this year.

I know it's horrible to think this way, but I need someone. I need a distraction and Aydrian seems like the perfect fit for that. We can date for a while and then break up after senior year. Most high school relationships don't even last any way.