SURRENDER - Mafia Romance

• CHAPTER 51 •

When I opened my eyes, a groan unconsciously escaped my mouth. I knew exactly what I had to deal with. The memories of the previous night slowly trickled into my consciousness, accompanied by a throbbing headache and a dry, parched mouth. I felt him. I felt his presence next to me but I was scared to look. My heart was beating faster than normal. I laid there, tangled in her bed sheets, as if trying to escape the reality. But when I heard his voice, I knew I had to face the consequences of my actions.

"Good morning,"

I turned on my other side, facing his blue eyes, wishing I never had to go through everything to be laying in this bed once again. Looking at his eyes made me see all what Yuna was telling me. Maybe I loved Joe but I never stopped loving Ace. But there was a stabbing pain that kept reminding me that I was doing nothing but betray Joe, betray his love for me, his death for me.

"Good morning," I gave him a small smile. "I-uh- have to go to work so," I sat down and before I could get up, his hand gripped at my wrist. He sat down too, messed hair, red eyes and puffed lips.

"I know you're probably mad about what happened. I really tried to not– you know. But you were–" he shook his head, "that's not an excuse, I know. And I am sorry."

"Ace," I interrupted him, "it's okay. I'm not blaming you."

"But you regret it and I understand, we–"

"Ace, Ace," I held his hands in mine, hugging his eyes with my soft gaze, "I don't regret it."

He looked at me, confused of what I just said, "you don't?"

I shook my head and let go of his hands, "I just," I sighed, unsure of how to explain what I was feeling, "I feel like I am betraying him."

He looked down at his hands, knowing who I was talking about without mentioning his name. He was hurt, I could see it, but no one said anything.

"And also after everything that happened between us–"

He interrupted me by moving to my edge of the bed, facing me, he held my hands in his, "I know, Talia. I know I fucked up. But you never gave me a chance to say anything."

"You didn't try to say anything, Ace."

He paused, "I know. I was stupid. I thought that—" he shook his head, "I thought that no matter what I said or done, you won't love me again. You won't see me the same. You won't trust me again. I hated the look in your eyes and I was willing to do anything than to see you look at me the way you were."

He saw I was confused so he scoffed.

"I know I fucked up but I never wanted to face you after what I did. You were looking at me as if I was some kind of monster and I'd rather die than seeing your eyes full of hatred towards me like they were."

"I never hated you," I simply said. He looked at me, begging for more. My heart picked up its pace and I wasn't sure what my tongue was going to say. "I left because I was mad at you not because I stopped loving you." I added. "In fact, I left because I loved you so much I never thought you'd hurt me like that."

"I'm sorry," he whispered, looking deeply into my eyes, begging for forgiveness. "I know sorry won't do anything but I really am."

I gave him a small smile, "I just wish you showed your care a little sooner." Without mentioning my intentions, he understood what I wanted to say. I wished he spoke before trying to move on from him, before falling for Joe and making him lose his life because of me.

"I would do anything for you Talia, anything to be with you. Anything for you to look at me again."

"Would you die for me too?"