Char&Nicky

Your dirty shoes

Charlie's POV:

*Riiiingggggg*

Finally! It's the end of today's class. I do enjoy english literature, but right now I am too much on edge to talk about Shakespeare. Mondays really aren't meant for thinking too much. Still, my thoughts can't help but run trough my mind like a swarm of bees. (I swear, even Shakespeare couldn't think of a better analogy.) Nick's probably preparing his lads for seeing me on the field for the first time ever. Today is the day, the day that I die inside. I might be overdramatic, still, that is how I feel. I pull my nervous shaking body down the hall when someone bumps my shoulder. It was quite a strong hit. I lift my head up and notice Ben turning around to face me. It took him a few seconds before he turned right back and continued walking the other way. Not a word was spoken, yet a lot was said. My heart ached knowing he intentionally ignored me. He hasn't reached out to me since the last time we were together. Still, all I want is to kiss him, still, I want him to care for me. Distance hurts when all you want is to be loved. The hurt was stinging in my stomach right along with hope. Such a cruel combination of feelings. Carrying all this discomfort inside, I continue walking to the changing room where the rugby team was talking banter and preparing for practice.

"Oi, Nick, is this Charlie guy coming or whot?", is what I hear from the room while mentally preparing myself in the hall.
"Yes, he is", Nick's muffled voice echoes.
"I hope I don't catch the gay from him!", a burst of laughter came from probably everyone in that room. But when I entered, suddenly everyone was quiet. Nick's giving a dirty look to the lad who said that. Seeing that, butterflies start fluttering in my stomach. With my gaze glued to the floor I walk up to one of the benches and start changing. I hate changing in front of others, so I found a secluded corner where no one can see me.

"Hey!", Nick walks up to me, a smile spread wide across his face. More than ever.

"Hi!"

"You ready for your first practice?"

"Hm, kinda..."

Nick then puts his hand on my shoulder and looks me in the eyes making mine to look at him:

"They won't bother you, I promise."

Unable to say anything I just smile and nod. All of the sudden every feeling I had about bumping with Ben isn't even on my mind. It all washed away. I know I am safe with Nick wherever we are. Our cute little moment is broken by a whistle that comes from the outside. Making a huge noise, everyone heads out on the field.

"Come on", Nick whisperes and taps me on the shoulder. We'll see how it goes.

...

"COME ON GUYS, RUN FASTER! CHARLIE, GET MORE AGRESSIVE! GO, GO, GO!", I am out of breath and got hit in the face three times today, yet I am being yelled at by our coatch. Great.
The most important thing is that I managed to not get tackled today, I couldn't handle that. Nick showed me how to do it yesterday at the dog park. We had a good laugh and I hope he didn't notice I was blushing the whole time. Still, I don't feel comfortable enough to do it with any other players. The whistle I've been waiting for the entire game finally whisteled: end of the practice. As I dragged myself to the changing room, a couple of lads rested their arms on my shoulders and started complimenting me about how fast I ran today. All of the lads were really supportive and encouraging to me, which I found shocking. It's good that they are atleast supportive about that. It was quite nice of them to say that, maybe not all of them are mean afterall. After changing into my regular clothes, Nick came up to me and asked if I wanted to get smoothies, so I gladly said yes.

...

"It was so funny when Mat got kicked in the face, he tripped so badly it was- ... Are you okay?", Nick stopped and worry filled his eyes. I couldn't pay attention to what he was saying, my mind was on something else. While strolling out of the changing room, I noticed someone in the distance. Ben was leaning against the large post that was supporting the school building, looking in my direction. I don't know what he wants now, but after today I certanly don't have the intention of seeing him. I also, even after everything I've been trough with him, don't want him to go trough shit with his family because of me, so it's best to stay distant for a while.

"Charlie... are you okay?"

"Yeah, just keep walking."

Nick noticed something was off with me. My serious look betrayed me, he saw who I was looking at. I don't think I will tell him anything about Ben now. Mabye never. It's best if it stays what it was, a secret.