Meeting Again

Chapter 4

 (The lines that are in italics are entries from Nivedita's diary)


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I rented a small house secretly when Mr. Rathore was on the trip, using my savings with the help of my colleague. I knew I would have nowhere to go when Mr. Rathore would leave me or get 'bored' of me. I would build my small world again away from my family.

All my life, I have lived without any parental love and faced hate, judgment, and taunts from the world alone due to my status as an illegitimate child. But my parents crossed all limits by selling me to that old man. I would never meet them again.

And the devil, who treated me as a puppet and now taking care of me, I know it's because he is just over-possessive of my body. He was going to almost kill Sanjay just because he accidentally touched my hand. I would break free from the clutches of this possessive force.

The only best thing that happened to me in his gigantic AR Estate, was Merry and Jenny, entrusted to me as escorts by Mr. Rathore, they became my genuine friends.

Now I cannot even leave the Estate without his permission. I took his consent to go to the market because I wanted to buy some essential stuff for my rented house. But his guards left me at the entrance of the city's biggest mall, which was completely deserted, with me, Merry, and shopkeepers in the whole mall. When I discovered it was Rathore's property. I decided not to purchase even a pin from his damn property.

Merry, on the other hand, reveled in the deserted mall, She tasted every weird juice there and offered me the best one there, according to her. But that juice made me dizzy, prompting a hasty retreat back to the Estate. In the hazy sleep that followed, I dreamt about confessing my every feeling to Sahil.

But when I woke up, I berated myself. How could I be so low? He is officially my Jiju now. A newfound determination took root within me—to bury those emotions and consign them to the recesses of my past, forging ahead with the promise to forget him entirely.
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Reading about the confession dream in the diary, Advik reminisced about the day when Nivedita, in a drunken state, tearfully pointed to her heart and confessed, "I have a secret no one knows, but I'll tell you today. I'm the stupidest person in the world because I fell in love with you, knowing you could never be mine."

Advik realized it wasn't a confession but a misunderstanding that altered his life. On that day, he sensed that just as she was turning his world upside down, he, too, held an impact on her. He was drawn to her pure, selfless soul; her tears pricked his heart, her pain became him, and her presence brought him peace. Upon discovering her feelings, his heartbeat quickened. He felt like he might have fallen for her at that very moment because he still remembers how he called doctors the next day thinking he had succumbed to heart disease. After all, whenever, he even thought about her, his heart started beating abnormally. The doctor replied, "Sir, it is not a physical but a psychological condition called Love." Advik stupidly asked for its treatment, doctor fearfully suggested that stay away from her, Advik roared like a beast, "How dare you!" and kicked the doctor out. When he instructed Sanjay to fetch books on matters of the heart and immersed himself in their pages, he found that the descriptions mirrored his predicament as outlined in the texts. This uncanny resemblance between the romantic woes depicted in the books and his situation only served to heighten his exasperation. It seemed as though the pages were unfolding a script that mirrored the complexities of his own life, intensifying his sense of irritation and frustration. How is this possible?

However, everything unraveled when Advik later learned that, after falling deeply for her, the confession was meant for Sahil. Feeling deceived, he started to see her as a liar and a traitor who played with his heart.

As the waves of agonizing memories surged back, he again coughed blood. Hastily setting the Diary aside, he made his way to the bathroom to rinse his mouth. In the harsh light, he glimpsed his reflection in the mirror, his face a shade of crimson and his eyes taking on a deeper hue of blue. Despite the ominous changes, he chose to dismiss them, dousing his face with cold water. Emerging from the bathroom, he resumed his place and, undeterred, once again delved into the pages of the Diary.

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The only thing keeping me sane in my life was my hope-my job. But Mr. Rathore destroyed it too, and tendered my resignation on my behalf. When I reached out to Sanjay to request him not to snatch away my job, he sadly told me he was also as powerless as me but shared a piece of advice, "Mr. Rathore would never do anything that can be harmful to you mam. You can try to make him agree when his temper is subdued and please try not to provoke him."
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Advik thought, "I did not want you to get hurt after discovering your family's destruction. I knew you would again shed tears and I would not be able to resist them. With the entire country abuzz with the overnight downfall of these two families, I made every effort to shield you from the distressing news." Sighing, he turned to the next page,

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Hello Bestie,

Happy Diwali! Today is Diwali, and I do not know how to celebrate. It's not that I never liked it, but I was alone to celebrate any festival. But today with the help of Merry and Jenny I learned it. I wanted to decorate the Estate, but I also knew I had no right, and I also knew it would take weeks to decorate this huge Estate. But today was a shocking day, I was allowed to not decorate myself but only to order the workers and name the items I like to use for decoration. In just a few hours the whole house's look changed—Perk of Advik Rathore's influence. When Merry and Jenny gave me gifts, I also wanted to give them gifts. But as I was not allowed to go out, I decided to make gifts with my own hands. The second shock of the day I got was an angry Mr. Rathore who noticing all the gifts said like a petulent child, "You are mine so where is my gift?"

Honestly, I even did not remember him but witnessing his dead glare I made the lamest excuse ever by offering my caramel candies which was I eating to him. He again became angry and demanded, "You packed other's gifts but not mine. Pack it!". I was so shocked at his behavior, that if I was not aware of his mood swings I would believe he had entered into Little Space.

Later another shock was when Mr. Rathore took me to the Diwali Shopping Street, after dressing me in a dozen clothes like a bear and carrying my shopping bags like a gentleman. The biggest shock was when he touched an unsanitized gun to win a doll toy for me, ignoring his mysophobia. What has happened to him? But today was the best day for me. I enjoyed Diwali for the first time. The gestures of Mr. Rude warmed my heart for the first time. I enjoyed the Diwali air candle balloons and crackers so much that I almost forgot I was with HIM and joyously wished him a 'Happy Diwali' but in return got his poker face. There was a commotion in public these balloons and crackers were a rich man's extravagant gesture for his lover. I admired that man. What a lucky girl!

The next day I received a lot of diamond pieces of jewelry and a jar full of my favorite caramel candies as a return Diwali gift from Mr. Rathore, but the dream I saw last night had destroyed my peace, in which Mr. Rathore said, "Happy Diwali but I want 'a baby' from you as Diwali gift."

I prayed to God never to turn this nightmare into reality. I would never allow it. Babies are signs of two people's love, not some contract or someone's demand.
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After finishing that page, Advik thought he knew that Nivedita deceived him by giving him caramel candies despite knowing he hated milk. Therefore, unbeknownst to her he had confiscated all gifts she made, from every servant and kept them with him. But later he even surprised himself by taking her to the shopping streets, which he hated the most- crowds. He did so just because he watched an AD that girls become happy by shopping especially on Diwali. He thought as she loved him, it was his responsibility to make her happy. Therefore, he used colored air balloons and crackers to make her smile. His jaw clenched when he saw his security personnel, disguised as common citizens, dragging Shalini who tried to approach Nivedita in the crowd. In the moment of raw emotion, he whispered, "Perhaps he should have killed Shalini that day. Maybe today, his burden of guilt would be lighter." He signed with culpability and turned to the next page,


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My bad luck seemed to be a constant companion, never relenting, and my nightmare came true because in the morning I was taken for a body check-up and in the evening I came to know that Advik wanted to impregnate me with his baby. I felt like someone had banged my head with a heavy hammer leaving me stunned. That's why he was feeding me nutritious soups, his eyes, and voice were soft talking to me. there was no coldness in him. And I again made a fool out of myself today by thinking that someone was genuinely taking care of me.

But how was this possible?
He abducted me just because I could be pregnant after our first night. He said to me I was unfit to be the mother of his child.
So now what changed? I am in such mental turmoil nowadays that I cannot guarantee to keep my baby happy. No, I would never agree to this barbaric term, and become pregnant with a beast's child.

The only word that destroyed my life from childhood was "Illegitimate", and now how could I choose the same fate for my child with my own hands? What guarantee did I have of a stable future for my child if Advik abandoned me and my child as decided, what would my child's future be? And if he snatched my child from me after birth because I know he hates me and is the most arrogant man in the world he would surely do it.

Unable to accept the cruel irony of willingly birthing a child under circumstances I had spent a lifetime trying to escape, I mustered the strength to refuse him. "I do not want a baby. I fear the pain of childbirth," I declared. However, his response shattered my expectations. "Do not worry. I will instruct my medical team to develop a drug that will spare you from the agony of labor."

Is he insane?

Is there anyone in this world who can understand my heart's miseries?
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Upon absorbing Nivedita's thoughts, Advik murmured with a touch of reflection, "Back then, even I couldn't fully grasp why I was driven to such lengths. I just wanted to permanently keep you with me through a child, because I thought as you love me you also wanted the same." He chuckled dryly and continued reading.

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I have been having nightmares of my troubled childhood since Advik demanded a baby from me. These nightmares are my childhood incidents when I was bullied by society. Because of them, I have decided I would never choose the same trauma for my baby. no matter what I have to do.

My throat is badly injured and my stomach is full of pain and gastric juice because of forcibly vomiting the nourishing soup prescribed by doctors so that my body gets prepared for pregnancy. I have been doing it for two grueling months. It was my secret. I know I am risking my health to prevent what I dread the most from happening and if Advik came to know about it, his anger would be unimaginable.

Besides fear and pain, there is also sadness of deceiving him.

Maybe because I have never deceived anyone in my life.

Or maybe he was the first person who was taking care of me.

But I am helpless too!
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Since that time, I have been living here, Advik consistently arrives home at six in the evening, departing early in the morning. But today he was there sleeping with an angelic peace, hugging me closely. I couldn't fathom what overcame me, but my gaze remained fixated on his princely countenance. He is undeniably the most handsome man I have ever beheld, yet today, an angelic tranquility adorned his features.

I didn't even realize when he stirred and opened his eyes. However, when our eyes met, my thoughts ceased, his eyes were extremely blue to a frightening extent. Sensing my expression, he abruptly awoke and left without a word.

Concern creeps into my thoughts—what has befallen him?

Is he not well?
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Why was Advik behaving in such a manner?

His approach to tackling his office work involved gently holding my hands, and treating me as delicately as one would a small baby.

He took me to an Amusement Park, despite his aggravation with crowded places. When I entered the park, I felt like I was going to explode with happiness. It was one of my fantasies to visit an amusement park, but I did not want to do it alone.

But today I relished the amusement park so much that I felt like a joyous baby, delighting in every moment of exhilarating fun and carefree excitement.

My heart every time swells with happiness whenever I look over and find Advik waiting for me below, and my fear for him dissipates for the moment.

In my excitement, I even offered him to ride the Uphill water coaster with me. I was beyond shocked when he not only agreed but also embraced me tightly throughout the ride like he was protecting me from water splashes. Damn, his possessiveness!

At the end of the ride, I laughed happily and in return got his small gentle smile. So, he also knew how to smile?

Today my heart fluttered with inexplicable emotions at his touch, by looking at his handsome face, especially his eyes.

What is happening to me?

Why my heart is beating like a marathon?
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Upon finishing the page, Advik's hands trembled, and he swallowed hard, a knot of anticipation tightening in his throat. He was aware that if his thoughts were validated tonight, the profound solitude he felt for Nivedita might drive him to contemplate drastic measures.


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I find myself in a situation where I'm unable to comprehend a particular person and even myself. Mr. Rathore was behaving apprehensively seeing me vomiting, and the very next moment rudely when Soni, my colleague approached me in the amusement park. He dragged me from the park saying, "You seem to be okay with her eyes full of lust on me."

But the incident that followed, left me stunned. As we left the amusement park, a car came my way with an alarming speed, but just then the blow that was made for me, Advik took on himself, embracing me in his arms like a protective shield.

Despite bleeding himself, he prioritized checking me for injuries. At the hospital, instead of tending to his wounds, he fiercely demanded answers from the doctors like a beast regarding my sudden vomiting episodes. I requested him to get medical aid for his injuries but a single stern glance silenced me.

When the doctor told him that I was suffering from severe gastritis and my throat had gotten an ulcer because of daily vomiting due to using some tools, he did not believe them because I told him, my daily vomiting was just due to the taste of that nutritious soup. He hugged me saying, "You are mine so I should take care of you. I am feeling angry with myself. You were suffering and I did not know. You will not eat that soup. Leave pregnancy,  You are more precious to me so just take care."

Seeing his bloody clothes, I urged him to get his wounds treated but he first gave me my prescribed medicines and then left kissing my forehead. I felt like my heart was clenching with guilt for deceiving him.

My heart has surrendered all self-control I have practiced all my life.

Why was I happy to see anxiety in his eyes for me?

Why did my soul find its peace in his arms?

How could I forget he had caged me?
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It's been a week since Advik went missing, and I've been waiting for him tirelessly day and night. The uncertainty surrounding his well-being tightens my heart, with thoughts of him consuming my every waking moment. The genuine concern I felt for his injuries at the hospital now morphs into anxiety and restlessness. Where could he be? Why did he leave without a word?


Anger simmers within me as I question his absence. Why am I so anxious about someone who may not need me? Yet, the need for someone to ease the turmoil in my heart remains unanswered. His image lingers, and the possibility of his injuries, perhaps incurred because of me, torments my mind.


This emotional upheaval is unlike anything I've experienced before. It's as if he has become a vital part of my existence. I find myself unable to eat or sleep, growing increasingly frustrated. The question nags at me: Could this be some form of Stockholm syndrome, or is it a deeper connection that I'm grappling to understand?
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After 1 week, when I was sleeping I felt I was in the air but when I opened my eyes I found myself in Advik's lap. His eyes were so intense that my every word struck in my throat. My eyes sparkled with peace of heart.

When I looked around I found I was not in the bedroom but we were sitting alone on a platform built on a rock by the side of a waterfall, water falling in a valley from a small mountain. Cool breezes were flowing, and in dark and silent surroundings, only water flowing could be heard. The only light of the full moon was looking like blue glitter sparkling in the water as if there were fireflies. The chilly water was flowing under my feet.

Where was I and How I was there?

I mistakenly asked Advik how the water looked so beautiful, he started rambling a lecture about the whole scientific phenomena of full-moon light. It was damn funny!

I played in the water like a child and splashed on Advik after confirming his health recovery and he responded with the same enthusiasm. Tonight I felt he was not The Mighty Rathore, just a simple man Advik. And I liked it.

I have more enjoyed in the past 10 days than I had enjoyed in the past 10 years.

I felt like a pervert because when Advik carried me in his arms from that valley, I was ogling him. His sparkling eyes, water droplets falling from his hair to his handsome face, and his muscular chest with soaked and transparent shirt were making my heartbeat insanely fast like I was seduced by man's sexy and seductive side.

Was I bewitched?
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Advik felt like a fool because he recalled how he had put a thermometer in her mouth when he had noticed her red face. Today he understood she was blushing. He could not stop himself from pondering what would have Nivedita thought about him then.


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Today, as my eyes fell upon a crystal ball delicately placed on the bedside table, its form mimicking a waterfall with water engulfed in fluorescent speckles resembling a blue starry sky, memories of the previous night's incident flooded my mind. The ball must have been a surprise for me from him.

In this moment of truth, I must confess that my Stockholm Syndrome is gaining strength, causing a shift in my emotions towards him. But I would stop it by reminding every bad thing he did to me so that if I got a single chance to escape from him, I would run away. I know he is a fierily dangerous man and my heart would turn into ashes, that's why I needed to heighten the guard walls of my heart.
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I want to scream today asking God why fate let Advik meet me. He is not human but an emotionless devil. All my impossible thoughts about him and my feelings for him proved to be the most disastrous thing in my life. My eyes have opened now letting me, hate him again.

Today Merry, offered me her phone and listen to her favorite music as therapy. But a news notification caught my eye saying, "Businessman Sudhir Mathur had a suicidal death today because of his business downfall."
My papa had died, I did not even know, and when I searched about business destruction on Merry's phone, I found out someone had taken over not only my father's but also Sahil's company. Their all business projects had been canceled. They were brought on the road in the name of loans and loss on the very next day of Didi's marriage. And it caused Papa's death today.

I know who has such power to destroy anyone in the blink of an eye. It was a normal thing for Advik, he was famous for his demonic ways. But I had requested him to spare them all. They wronged me, I decided to cut my ties with them but I never wanted to harm them. I am feeling guilty for my father's death.

I asked Advik the reason for such an obsessive act he arrogantly replied, "They were treating you like trash in that disgusting wedding, of course, I would show them hell. But do not worry I have been lenient with them just because of you." Hearing his reply I just lost my consciousness.

When I got my senses back, I knew he was sitting beside me, I did not open my eyes, he knew I was awake and said to me, "I never knew your father would die." But there was no remorse in his voice, I knew he was stone-hearted.
He then told me to get up, eat soup, and take medicines. When I did not budge, he said, "Only your father is dead but other members are still alive."
 Did he again threaten me? I got up and looked at his face but tears slipped down my eyes. When he noticed my tears, his emotionless face softened. He was feeding me and examining my face and then suddenly spoke, "I would make their business normal again but you would not cry and take care of yourself."

I was shocked but decided to bargain with him and told him that I would do as he said, but I would meet them after everything was normal because he was a cunning man, I could not trust him. He again agreed. After giving me medicine and making sure I was fine he left from there.

What had just happened?

Did he just back off of his cruelty?
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Upon revisiting that poignant moment after perusing his love's diary, Advik found himself lost in thought. "When you blacked out that day, it felt as if the ground had slipped from beneath me. It was then that I confessed to myself I had madly fallen in your love, admitting you were my only weakness. In my attempt to shield you from the harsh reality, I hesitated to disclose the truth, knowing your innocent nature. Hence, I chose to withhold the unsettling news: your father's demise was not a result of suicide but a consequence of being tragically murdered by your mom."
 He shook his head and resumed reading it,



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I could not believe Advik completed his promise. Didi and Mom came to AR Estate with a handsome man, though not more than Advik. He was Vikram, Advik's special man to scare and threaten innocent people on his behalf. What I am talking about! Leave it.

When Didi met me and cried hugging me, she told me how much she searched for me after marriage but could not find me. She is so pure, good, and innocent that despite facing hell only because of me she still cares about me. I was very happy after meeting her. I apologized to her for facing such a situation but she dismissed me saying, I am her sister, so it is okay. She is the best. She also invited me for her upcoming Birthday.