The Billionaire's Assistant

Chapter 44

"What did you mean," she asked after a beat of silence. "Before."

His eyes flicked back to hers. "When?"

"When you said you feel bad for my boyfriend. I don't have one," she reaffirmed quickly, "but why did you say that?"

"Oh. That." He laughed. "It's nothing. It's just the car you picked," he said, patting the steering wheel affectionately. "Rolls-Royce Ghost with Black Badge trim, brand new."

Kat looked around at the red accented black leather interior.

"So how much was it?" she questioned, almost afraid to ask.

"Not as bad as the ones you picked yesterday. I got it for something like 410K."

$400,000, Kat marveled to herself.

"I was trying to pick one that didn't look pricey," she confessed.

Jove laughed his contagious, near joyous laugh and Kat joined in, unable to help herself.

"Like I said," he reiterated. "Expensive taste."

They were pulling up to the B and it occurred to Kat for the first time to wonder if the lobby's front door would still be open despite the late hour. If she seemed as if she were locked out of her apartment in the middle of the night, Jove definitely wouldn't let it go. She'd have to answer some questions and more than likely take him back to the den so that he could at least watch her enter somewhere.

Maybe I can have him drive me to my moms, she thought as she climbed the stairs to the lobby door after their goodbyes.

Jove idled in the hulking, gleaming black car, watching her she was sure. She pulled the handle, expecting resistance, and for the second time there was none, the door opening just as easily as it had the first morning Jove had brought her there.

She turned back to him, flashed him a quick smile, and stepped into the nearly otherworldly lobby, its light bright and glaring in sharp contrast to the cool night air. She looked up, noting the patterns of multicolored purple and pink flowers with delicate green vines dangling from them were rearranged in an intricate pattern of overlapping swirls, one that must have taken hours on a ladder and now appeared effortless, as if they were floating down from heaven.

"You're back!" a familiar, cheery voice called, and Kat looked up with a smile, grateful to see the same kindly woman who'd supplied her with coffee and instructed her to come back sometime.

"I knew you'd be back," she said with a grin. She beckoned Kat to her desk. "It's too late for coffee but you need something hot, tea."

Kat began to protest, but the woman waved her away, opening the back room door and disappearing into its comparative dimness.

"You need some tea hun," she said authoritatively, returning with two mugs, an assortment of tea bags, and a small, squeezable jar of honey.

"I really don't have time," Kat said weakly.

"I already put on the water," the woman said with a shrug, as if an action had been put in motion that couldn't be undone.

Kat, suddenly exhausted, nodded, wanting to rest her head on the woman's desk.

"Sit," the older woman instructed, pulling her swiveling desk chair to Kat and gently gripping her shoulder to press her into it.

Kat sat gratefully and sighed, a tumult of emotions galloping across her tired mind.

"Are you ok hun?" the woman asked, her genuine concern evident in her tone.

Kat nodded, then shook her head.

"I don't know," she sighed. "I'm ok. I'm fine I guess, I just." She took a deep breath. "I'm just in this situation right now. And I haven't done anything wrong, I guess, but I just feel...bad. I feel guilty. And I feel like I should feel this way, like..." She stopped, finding herself suddenly fighting back hot tears. "I just don't understand why I feel this way, I don't understand why I cant want what I know I should, I just, I just don't understand."

The woman patted her hand soothingly, a comfortable silence stretching between them while Kat wiped her nose on her sleeve.

"It's hardest to accept what we don't understand," the woman said finally. "I'm not sure what exactly it is that you can't accept, I know it's none of my business, but I will say this. Understanding isn't everything."

She smiled at her, a smile well worn but not tired, oft employed but not overused, and held Kat's hand in both of hers. "You seem like a smart girl, really smart. I know that being logical, being practical, understanding things, all that probably means a lot to you, right?"

Kat nodded.

"But passion, love? Those are things that can't be understood. Think of the things you love, the people, the places. You don't have to understand them to love them, you don't even have to understand why you love them, you just do."

Images of the lake flashed across Kat's mind, the giggles she and her mother shared over their secret word, outsideness, and the whole language of nature that it opened up for them. She didn't understand that, the woman was right. It had just always been a part of her, was an inherency within her.

"So if you feel," the woman continued. "And you don't understand, you have to dig a little deeper, find out why."

She placed Kat's hand gently back in her lap and turned towards the back door, a mechanical chirping noise beeping behind her.

"Electric kettle," she explained over her shoulder, returning with it and filling both their mugs.

Kat dunked in a chamomile tea bag and they waited for a few moments in another comfortable silence, one born of the ease of a longstanding relationship.

"At least two sips," the brunette commanded maternally, pushing the cup towards Kat once the color had darked to a hue she deemed appropriate. "You need tea," she said decisively. "Everybody needs tea."

Half the cup downed and almost 10 minutes later, Kat was rushing out onto the street, glad she'd talked to the woman, but certain it was now past midnight. She had no idea what she would say to the group, hadn't had the time to put any thought into what she'd tell them when she finally arrived.

Why am I planning out a lie? she thought guiltily. He kept me late to help him write a speech, I'm his assistant, that's completely normal. She frowned. I'll tell them the truth, and I'll tell them he dropped me off at the B. Which is also true, she reminded herself, her frown deepening. Even when she told the truth about Jove it felt like she was lying.