My Songbird's Dream

22. The Dance of Shadows

Park Ji-Tae
October, 1941
Occupied Seoul

"Absolutely not. There is no sense in forcing me to marry her," I told my father defiantly even as he paced about the study.

He fixed me with a stern gaze. "It has been decided. As the first heir, this is your duty - without this alliance, our family's fortunes could be lost." 

I threw up my hands in frustration.  "Then I will work to secure our business myself!"

Father scoffed. "With access to what money or influence, Ji-tae? This life you currently enjoy, free of violence - do you truly understand what allows for such tranquility while chaos reigns outside? Our people are clawing at copper and filling the stations of foreign military to just survive."

His sharp words gave me pause. He pressed on. "Proximity to power provides safety. Binding your future with hers grants continued access. You will see the wisdom in this."

I straightened, obstinate. "I refuse to barter my whole life away purely for closer ties with corrupt despots. If that is the cost of privilege, I want no part of such security."

Father's expression chilled, eyes narrowing. "You are still young, still naive about the realities of protecting this family. But you will fulfill your obligations - "

"Or what?" I challenged, meeting his hard stare. "Disown me for refusing to subjugate my own happiness?"

For an instant, uncertainty flashed across his solemn features. We matched distaste, neither willing to bend. At last he sighed, a bone-deep weariness entering his voice. Perhaps out of paternal care rather than authority. "My son, there are always alternatives to utter extremes..."

I drew a tight breath as we matched stubborn wills across his office. At last I straightened, adjusting my sleeves. "I have a business meeting to attend to. I will not debate this matter any further."

My father's frown deepened, but he stepped aside as I moved briskly toward the door. His sharp parting words arrested me briefly.

"You owe me compliance, Park Ji-tae. I invested everything to give you this life and status...and the criticism I had to override to do so."

I stood frozen in the doorway. Indeed I did have much to thank for his selfless labor. And yet...did filial duty truly require total surrender of my personal aspirations?

I quietly closed the office door and retreated to the lounge without a word. My father's expectations weighed heavier with each step.

Perhaps there, in the haven filled with memories of Etta's lyrical laugh, I might catch my breath and gain perspective. Yet the encounter left me disquieted, questioning how to reconcile my heartfelt yearnings with long-held principles of obligation I could no longer blindly accept.

I sank onto the seat upon entering the lounge, closing my eyes and seeing Etta's radiant smile on stage bathed under the spotlight. As long as I still had her melody to hold onto, I could withstand these relentless pressures. Could I not? As pretentious as it sounded. Surely..."

"Mr. Park? Your next appointment is here," the lounge attendant announced politely, breaking my thoughts.

I straightened up, smoothing my suit jacket and regaining composure. I thanked him with a nod as he showed the visitor in.