Motherhood C.S

MISCARRIAGE {17}

ELLIE IS NOW 4 MONTHS PERGNANT.

As Chris was out with his brothers, again.

I was stuck at home with Crying kids and I also had to clean the house because Chris' parents were coming over for dinner tonight, again.

As I was washing dishes, I heard the kids just start screaming which made me drop a glass and it smash and broke everywhere, "shit" I said and walked up to the kids room and grabbed them both. "sh please go back to sleep please" I say but they just won't go back to sleep.

I put both the kids back in the bed and and just left them crying I walked down stairs and went straight to the medication shelf and grabbed out the hidden bag of c0cain I had.

I think about what this could do to the baby, but it would calm me down a lot, I open the bag and take some out and put it in a line and snorted it up.

"Fuck!" I say again and wrap the bag back up and hide it back in the the little shelf under everything, "what have I done?" I question myself, I grab my phone and then think about calling Chris, I stop thinking and put my phone back down, I was trying to think of what to do but I couldn't the kids were still crying.

After thinking I stand back up and go back to the kitchen and try and clean the mess, with Chris walks through the door.

He runs up stairs and see's me cleaning glass and with the baby's crying he as the biggest confused face I've ever seen.

"Baby, you okay?" I look up and just nod and continue cleaning as he run's up stairs to help the kids stop crying.

After 20 minutes Chris comes back down stairs and down stairs and sits next to Elli on the couch, "what's wrong?" he asked and rubbed my back.

"nothing, I was just stressed" I replied and shoved my face into his neck and hugged him, as he kissed the top of my head.

we just lay there until my stomach starts to hurt really bad, "ow shit" I say holding my stomach, 
"what? what's wrongs?" he asks me looking down at my face while slightly pulling me away from him.

"uh just my stomac- ow omg it hurts really bad" I say grabbing onto Chris, we stand up and Chris looks back "Omg baby your bleeding omg" I look back, and start to cry, I look at Chris and he already knows what has happened "we have to get you to a hospital" he said and ran upstairs grabbed the kids and we all ran outside.

we got in the car and drove to the hospital, "how the did this even happen you did everything right, I mean..." Chris said trying to hide his tears.

"Fuck!" Chris yelled randomly, "Chris, please calm down please" I say trying to calm him down.

"I'm sorry this is- what did we do wrong I mean, you ate well and drank well, slept well" he said with a big sigh.

we pull up at the hospital, Chris grabs the kids and we walked inside, and Chris walked me up to the counter.

"Hi my wife, is 4 months pregnant and she's bleeding badly" Chris said in a panic.

"Okay ma'am come with me please" she said and I followed her to a scanning room, "have you had kids before?" she asked me.

"Uh yeah 2" I replied and sat on the table, "okay just wait here for the doctor" she said and walked out of the room.

The doctor walked in and it was the same doctor that birthed my kids, "well well well Ellie sturniolo what brings you back tonight?" the doctor asked as he sat down.