Me and Katie have been broken up for nearly 3 months now. I'm not even sure how it happened I think we just needed space from each other but sitting in this hospital waiting room is making me realize How much I hate not having her in my life and having her next to me.
I hate hospitals, I always have, ever since I was a kid they just make me so panicky and being by myself right now isn't making me feel any better.
I know I've probably only broken my ankle but that's a big deal, as Im a footballer and need it for my job.
As I sit on the plastic chair surrounded by people, my mind starts racing along with my heart. I can't help but think the worst, like I won't be able to play again, I know that won't be the case but I'm not thinking rationally right now. My irrational thoughts and pounding heart lead me to make the decision to pick up my phone and click on her contact. She knows how much I hate hospitals and she's the only person I want to see right now so I press the call button.
"Hello....?" Katie says, sounding understandably confused
"H-hi, sorry for calling I'm I-m at the hospital and I didn't know who else to call" I say quietly, trying to control my breathing to avoid having a panic attack in a room full of people.
"Okay" she sighs "take some deep breath's okay, and tell me which hospital you're at" she says in a calm voice, sensing my panic
"Uh-uhm the one in st albans... Katie I'm sorry for calling, I'll be okay " I say getting a wave of embarrassment after calling her in such a state.
"Don't be silly y/n, I know how much you hate hospitals. I'll be there in 10 minutes okay?" She says softly
"Thanks Kate" I say, her nickname accidentally slipping out my mouth. I mentally curse myself but she doesn't mention it.
My un-injured leg is bouncing up and down as I wait for the doctor to call my name. I'm hoping Katie would get here before that but all hope of that is shattered when the doctor calls my name
"Y/n y/l/n?" She calls into the busy waiting room.
I stand up and give her a weak smile, and follow her into the office.
It was hard to hear what the doctor was saying while my heartbeat was thumping in my ears but I made out 'sprained ankle' and '5-6 weeks out of football' which wasn't great news but at least it wasn't broken, right?
After I'm given crutches, and told to come back for a check up next week I make my way back to reception. As I'm walking towards the door, her face catches my eye. We make eye contact and she stands up and makes her way over to me. Im not in the mood to talk and want to leave as soon as possible and Katie picks up on that. She guides me to her car and helps me in. Even if we've been apart for months she still knows exactly what I need in situations like this which makes it so much harder knowing she isn't mine anymore.
The car ride is silent on the way home, after 10 minutes I decide to break it.
"Thanks for coming, you didn't have to " I say sincerely, turning to look at her in the drivers seat.
"It's okay, I wanted to" she reply's, giving me a smile before turning back to the road.
Our break up was mutual, we both wanted it, at least I thought I did. But being close to her again is making all the feelings I've tried to push deep inside me feel like they're clawing their way back out.
We pull up outside my house and Katie comes to my door to help me out which I thank her for.
We make it inside, and I look at the time, not realizing how late it was. Katie grabs me a bottle of water and we slowly make our way upstairs to my bedroom, that we once shared.
I told Katie to stay in the spare room, as it was past midnight and it was just easier, I also liked the idea of us being in the same house again but I knew I shouldn't be thinking about that.
We said night to each other, me thanking Katie again and giving her some pajamas before she left.
"Text me if you need anything or shout" she said before leaving the room after I gave her a grateful smile.
I couldn't sleep, it wasn't just the fact my ankle was throbbing but it was also the fact I knew she was asleep across the hall and I wanted her to be next to me.
After a few minutes of contemplating, I picked up my phone and went to her contact for the second time today.
I typed out a message and sent it before I changed my mind
Y/n
Can you come here?
Katie
I'm coming
I didn't expect her to reply so quickly, she was obviously still awake too.
The door slowly creaks open and I sit up to meet Katie worried eyes
"What's wrong? Are you okay?" She asks quietly
"I can't sleep" I say watching her closely, waiting for her reaction.
She doesn't reply, she just walks over to my bed and climbs in next to me. She opens her arms and I move into them, desperate to feel the comfort that I've been missing.
"I know things are a mess right now but I'm here, okay?" She says into my hair as her hand moves up and down my back
"I miss you. I hate sleeping in this bed without you. I hate you not being here" I mumble into her chest, not daring to look at her eyes.
"I hate it too" she sighs
"Do you think we made the right choice, to end things?" I ask, hoping she feels the same as me
"I don't know y/n but if it was the right decision, this wouldn't be the only thing I've wanted to do since we made it" she replies
" I wish things would go back to how they were" i say lifting my head to look at her.
"Me too" she sighs giving me a sad smile
"Then we should try. Give it a second chance. Give us a second chance" I say moving my hand to cup her cheek
she doesn't reply only moves her hand to my neck and pulls me into her until our lips meet. I melt into the kiss, wanting it for so long.
I fell asleep easily after we realized we both wanted the same thing, each other. She was back where she was supposed to be. Next to me.
——-
Sorry for not updating in ages, I've been busy for the last couple of weeks.
Hope you like this one xx
- also happy international women's day <3
