KRISHAVYAYAM

84. Introspection

She skipped in her steps and twirled, gleeful and soft, the embodiment of bliss. The princess caressed the scarlett rose petals lined up by the boudoirs of the queen who was nowhere to be seen since the time they had come to her mother’s maiden home at dawn. The colossal palace walls seemed to close in on her and the lores of the blood moons once Aunt Krishnaa had ruefully and reluctantly narrated were haunting. Her mother sang no lullabies the previous night and the one before it for she had been whisked away by gales that were vital to the air of the Jambudvipa politics.

"Maybe I should have stayed back at Mokshapuri, but then Maa . . ." Abhishtada sighed and shook her head with a resigned shrug, rogue painted lips drawn into a frown as she then jumped at the vox that rumbled in an ephemera and thundered low, the vox of the Great-Grandfather who then bellowed from the council hall. She did not know when her fingers crushed the bloom she had wanted to give Mother, terrified by the malice the overtone carried. Abhishtada's feet took her towards the grandiose chambers on their own and she concealed herself in the curtains shaded dim, in the shadows of the dying noontide, beads of perspiration deluging the aesthetic ivory dots and patterns embellishing her temple.

"Did not pay attention to the epistle? One with a foreign stamp?" Raksha seethed and dragged a palm across his raging countenance. Kamalnayani drew her arms to her back and let them clip together, ethereal features set in miserably and discomfort and perhaps agony too for she glanced everywhere but in the old man’s scathing eyes, flustered at the dearth of mindfulness from her end. Of course I have been mentally absent. Of course I burnt out myself owing to useless emotions.

The precedent wasn't done yet, "Did not know that the Videha king was willing to invite you and your husband to his state for diplomatic purposes? Did not consider heeding to his request and assure that Pandava Kumara Bhima is aided for his conquest? Did not bother returning to your duties on time, Vahnijaa? Am I eligible to ask you why?"

The woman momentarily fidgeted with the thread of the yagyopaveeta samskara tied to her petite shoulder to the other side of her waist, cheeks red with shame and the a bit parched lips— the same pair Abhi knew were hers too— quivering with a stifled emotion. "Accept my apologies Grandfather," she murmured tersely and dipped her chin, screwing her eyes shut in desperation. Kamya always remembered what Mata Kandali would say. [Bruises on the esteem, always deeper than that on the flesh]. "I shall at once seek the forgiveness of Maharajah Dharmadhvaja and . . . and Kanha, he has no fault—"

Maa is in pain.

"Leave it be, Pita," Raani Prishati coaxed with an earnest gaze and caught the arm of her daughter who breathed and loured deep, stabilizing the cacophonic tides that washed the shore of her apperception. "Krishnaa did demand some cajoling for she is in pandemonium, as are the Kurus and Vrishnis. Laado had to step in Indraprastha. She says she will mend her foible and we believe she will," she said with a confident upturned curve of her lips and glimpsed at Aishani who fervently nodded. The queen mother then surreptitiously motioned at the apertures as the other nobles smothered the nerves thrumming in them.

"Laado?" Krisha sharply inhaled, aghast, as the young princess gingerly stepped out of the shadows with mounding horror. "Maa," Abhishtada croaked through the lump in her chest and stared accusingly at Raksha who went pale at the epiphany. "You taught that we must not yell at anyone no matter what. Then why does Pramatamaha behave so?" Her wee self shuddered, doe eyes glistening with tears that did not delay in tracing the lengths of her winsome visage a moment from then. Kamalnayani instantaneously came to her knees and drew her daughter into an embrace, more in the throes because of the precious whimpers building at the back of Abhi’s throat and not the chagrin she had fuelled.

"No, my sweet one. Maa has committed a huge folly which may wound someone's esteem," the queen crooned and looked at her grandfather who grimaced, deciding that fleeing would be more favorable to the mothers and the daughters. To the legacies and the progenitors. But the queen resolved otherwise, ceasing his exit. "He wants our best, that is why he was alerting me of something that may be followed up by a useless battle."