84th floor.

Chapter 22

Zara

The opening night of ZNZ has quite literally changed my whole life as Chanel and her friend Tara got me to do a pregnancy test in Zade's apartment.

Then, Benji died. Zade held me all night as I cried and violently vomitted after seeing Benji's lifeless body. I understood it was an accident but it made me feel uneasy how much power Kain's family hold in these circumstances? How was it so easily dealt with?

I made Chanel swear to secrecy and so did Tara about my pregnancy. They were literally like big sisters and took care of me? Tara has a baby herself, she is married to that good looking doctor at the hospital.

What was I supposed to do? Kain would be a permanent mark in my life. He wouldn't be just an ex? The father of my child. I cried every night and I wanted to text him and sneak into the penthouse and pretend nothing happened.

Now I was scared. Terrified even? What if he doesn't want this? I didnt know if I wanted this...

I sat on the floor reading Kain's letter in a puddle of tears. Cant believe this boy wrote me a love letter in his funny enough nice neat handwriting.

I unblock him and call him.

"Can you come back please?" I say as he answers. I open the door 15 minutes later and Kain steps inside grabbing my face as he kissed my tear stained face all over before landing on my lips.

"I love you... you know that?" He asks. "I promise I will never fuck up again."

"Kain I need to talk to you." I say and he just looks at me. "Whats wrong?"

"Im pregnant." I say letting it out. It was now or never.

"What?" He says. I couldnt read his face and that panicked me even more.

"I found out opening night of ZNZ."  I say as he just stared at me.

"Say something?" I say.

"But youre on birth control? You have always been?" He says confused.

"Yeah and something it doesnt take clearly." I say and he just lets go of me.

"And you want me as the father of your child?" He asks. It was only then I realized how low he saw himself again.. as if he wasnt good enough for me when I battled constantly trying to live up to him.

"I dont want a child at all Kain?" I say confused. "Not with you not with anyone. Im 21? I dont have a place? I just started working."

"None of that is a problem Zara. What do you want me to do? Marry you?" He says and I frown. "You will marry me because we have a child together not because you actually want to be with me?"

"Zara I will marry you with or without a child." He says pulling me back.

"How did we end up like this?" I say as I start crying. He just holds me and holds me tight.

"Whatever it is Zara, we will figure it out." He says. He tilts my chin up and finds my eyes. "We will be better parents than our shitty ones thats for sure."

I felt better hearing this and suddenly things were coming together in my head. I wasnt gullible... but sometimes it was easier to be delusional..

"I am going to Mykonos for a week. Come with us?" He tells me.

"Work..." I say. "Im sure Zade can manage?" He smirks at me. "Lets get away from everything and our nonsense. I feel like i cant breathe in New York anymore."

"Okay. Ill talk to Zade." I say and he smiles at me. As if all the glimmer and hope have been reinstalled in him.

"Okay. Pack a bag. Were leaving tonight. My jet is ready."