Strawberries & Cigarettes: (Liskook)

Chapter 46 (forty-six)

What does Jenna's life look like?

With her first movie debut, She had already received the 'best new actress' award in a span of a year, Worked with every famous directors, praised and loved by fans and viewers in general.

So who would think that she was the loneliest person alive?

Standing right at the center of the stage and being praised by everyone but when she comes back at home, There was no one to greet her with a smile.

A haunting reality that will forever haunt her.

So whenever she sees Lisa, with that evergreen radiant smile, with good friends around her, All she could feel was resentment and jealousy.

The rage of losing her sister and the jealousy of seeing Lisa's perfect life, She couldn't help but to fall more deeply into despair.

She has to kill her.

Those words were the only thing that made her feel alive again.

I have to end her life.

Those words were the only thing that made her sleep at night.

So looking at the helpless Lisa infront of her, even though she felt guilt and sympathy, She was happy too.

She was satisfied to see her in pain and so helpless just like her.

She felt like the years she had spent in despair has been fulfilled after seeing Lisa in this state.

Despite her happiness, deep inside her consciousness, She knew that she had completely lost it. There is no going back from this and she would never find peace even if she kill Lisa but...for the sake of satisfaction, can't she kill her?

Lisa sniffled and lowered her head in surrender "I'm sorry jenna....I'm sorry for your sister. I am...sorry"

That's all what Lisa was kept repeating over and over again but it seems to only triggered jenna.

She pursed her lips "Just shut up!"

Lisa flinched at her words and eventually stop talking. Only her quiet sniffled can be heard in Jenna's apartment.

Jenna stared at her for a while and then finally speaks again "Do you know why I hate you so much?"

Lisa opened her mouth to response but jenna continued regardlessly.

"Of course I despise you because of my sister but also because you have always been so lucky" She said, her eyes never leaving Lisa "You seem to get everything you wanted and everything seems to go in your way"

"I had tricked you so many times and you also stupidly fell into it. There are so many scandals you have fell into, but whenever I thought you would never come back or never recover from that, You always proved me wrong"

Lisa's eyes widened and realised what jenna just said to her.

"So...you were the one-" She muttered and jenna smirked, almost mockingly yet her gaze was completely empty.

"You are such an innocent girl, Lisa" She said "You never would've doubted me right? Even though I have always been quite cold towards you and already shown you enough gesture to tell you I hated you"

Lisa fell into silence when the realisation really hits her.

So up to this day, all those scandals and hundreds of mishap in her career was due to jenna? Because of Jenna's involvement?

Everything was Jenna's doing.

Jenna stared at her expectingly "Do you hate me now, Lisa? Now that you know who is the real culprit behind those all things?"

After a while, finally Lisa tilted her gaze and look at jenna.

However, how much she tried to hates her, She  couldn't. How much she tried to blame her for those sleepless nights, She just couldn't.

Why?

Because Lisa now knew the real reason behind Jenna's resentment.

If she had known earlier that it was Jenna's doing without knowing the real reason behind, Lisa would've really hated her or blamed her. But now that everything was revealed, She could never hate her.

All she could do was to sympathise with jenna and try to understand her every decision.

"I... don't hate you, jenna" Lisa finally responded and Jenna's expectant smile froze. Lisa continued with a lowered gaze.

"I know, you must have suffered so much alone. And I also know that with mere words of sympathy, I cannot console you" She looked up at confused jenna "You were so lonely...and I understand your resentment. And if...killing me will bring a piece in your life then...kill me. I won't resent you"

What?

Jenna's eyes widened and unconsciously, She stepped back. Her eyes were glued at Lisa's sorry figure and she couldn't grasp at her stupid statement.

What did she just said?

She forgive her?

Even though she had done all those awful things to her? She was even ready to be killed by her?

"Are you out of your mind?" Jenna glared at her, with an unreadable expression on her face "You should...hate me!!! Despise me!!! How could you just say I can kill you!!!! Just beg me to let you go?!"

Lisa stared at jenna in confusion and said again "But...I can understand-"

"NO!!!! You can't understand me! No one can!!" Jenna shouted at her in rage or maybe in denial "You cannot understand me! You cannot understand my loneliness and my rage!!"

"Jenna-"

"Just shut up!!!" Jenna shouted her lungs out at her and Lisa closed her lips.

Jenna fell on the sofa beside her and stared at Lisa.

"You..." And she fell silent.

How could she say she understands her?

No one understands her!

She has been lonely since from the start and now this girl, her enemy is saying that she understands her?

How ridiculous!

But for some reason, Jenna's heart began to beat quickly.

A tickling feeling formed in her heart.

"Jenna...we could have been friends" Lisa finally spoke quietly but jenna didn't say anything and just stared at her with those two red eyes.

Jenna pursed her lips and looked away finally.

"Jenna-"

"Just shut your mouth" She said and stood up again.

For some reason, Jenna for once, wanted to believe those words that Lisa has spoken to her.

Maybe she was right, they could have been friends.

Maybe even best friends.

But...where did jenna went wrong?

Instead of forgiveness, why did she cling to revenge so desperately?

Tears rolled down her eyes and she looked at Lisa again but before she could say anything, with a crash, A figure jumped inside the living room.

As soon the figure entered the scene, Lisa's eyes widened "Jungkook!"