Little Rock-Star (GXG)

Chapter 45

(Devon's POV)

We got back home about 3 days ago. The rest of the tour was slow and dreadful. It consisted of Miley and I hooking up, arguments with Alex, arguments with the band and so on. I haven't gotten drunk in awhile. I do still smoke, though.

The past few nights, I've let Alex sleep in my bed, considering we use to share-but it's to awkward now. So, I sleep on the couch in my room. It's not that bad, but the bed is defiantly better. 

I've wrote more songs for our new album. I've also kept that journal-which I write in everyday. I basically write about how I feel and how the day went. It's like my diary..I guess. 

I sigh as I sit up, my back cracking in the process. I squint over to my bed, seeing that Alex is already up. I stand up, walking over to my closest. I take my sweatpants off, putting on black skinny jeans. I take my t-shirt, revealing my sports bra.

The door opens, making me spin around with a white V-neck in my hands. Alex looks at me, her eyes traveling down.

"My eyes are up here." I comment, making her look up with a blush. I let out a slight laugh before turning around. I put my shirt on, grabbing my leather jacket.

"Uh-shit. I f-forgot what I came up here for.." Alex mummers. I put on my leather jacket, turning around to face her.

"Maybe to get dress?" I suggest, walking into my bathroom. I brush my hair and my teeth. I walk back out to see Alex still standing there. I raise my eyebrow at her as I grab my things. 

I walk past Alex, out of the room, leaving her there. That was..awkward. I walk into the kitchen where everyone is, actually talking. But once I walk into the kitchen, the talking stops.

"What?" I ask them. "Can't talk around me?" I grab a bottle of water out of the fridge.

I huff when they don't respond.

"Know what? I'm going out." I mumble, walking out of the house with my hands in my pockets. I don't bother driving, I like to walk.

I don't know what I did to make them not talk to me. But I really want to fix it, I mean, I love all of them to death. I need to know what's going on so I can fix it-but I'm fearful of what they'd say. Does that sound stupid? Probably does.

I walk along the sidewalk, my feet pounding against the pavement. I stop to pull out a cigarette. I light it and put it in my mouth. I start walking with my head down, passing very few people. It's early for people to be walking outside. 

I blow out the smoke with my eyebrows furrowed. 

I don't fucking get it. They're mad at me for what? Arguing with Alex?

I walk into the park, finding a tall tree. I put my cigarette out. I put my hands on the tree, slowly climbing it. I reach one branch, then another. I stop on the second branch, seeing I'm high enough. I lean my back against the bark, my head resting. I pull out another cigarette, lighting it.

I do want to make up with Alex, trust me, I really do. I miss her like crazy. I love her to death, and I hate her for that. I hate that I can't stop loving her. I hate that I can't hate her-does that make since? Probably not. But I hate the way she makes me feel. I love her but hate her at the same fucking time.

"Hello!" A teenager around my age says, sitting on the branch across from me. I don't jump or move. I look over at the girl. She looks to be about 18 or 19.

"Hi." I blow out the smoke. The girl has short brown hair and beautiful brown eyes-not as beautiful as Alex's though. Shit, stop comparing.

"You look familiar.." She hums. I stay silent, giving her a chance to figure it out. "Have we met before?"

"Devon Swift. Proposal Till Twelve." I nonchalantly say. I put out my cigarette, smudging it against the bark of the tree.

"Oh! My little sister loves you guys. You guys are all she talks about." The girl says.

"And what's your name?" I ask, looking off at the park.

"Kai." Kai grins. I nod as I watch a little boy chase a dog. "May I ask, why are you here, on a tree? When you could be at your house or whatever."

I sigh and turn to Kai.

"You know Alex, right?" She nods. "Yeah? We're arguing. In fact, the whole fucking band is mad at me and I don't know why. I swear, I love them but they get on my fucking nerves."

Why am I opening up to a girl I just met? I don't know, but she's pretty and she looks friendly. And she sounds friendly.

"Why are you and Alex arguing?" Kai asks.

"You really do live under a rock," I mumble. "She cheated on me with Jeremy Wilson. I called things off and we agreed to be friends. We have..sex..I guess, and then she takes me on a date. The next day, she denies that she doesn't have feelings for me. And here we are."

"Why is the band mad at you?" 

"I don't know, could be for me getting drunk, or the hook ups I had. Who knows!" I bitterly laugh. "I came here to not talk about it, so can we change the subject?"

Kai nods as we sit in silence for a couple of minuets.

"You know," I start. "It's nice getting treated like a normal. Like right now, you aren't a crazed fan girl going after me, or Paparazzi taking a picture of me. You're just..sitting here, not asking questions. That is what normal people do, right?"

"People have different meanings of normal, so sure, let's go with what you just said!" Kai smiles at me. I let out a small laugh, closing my eyes. The sunshine is blocked by the leaves, creating shade for me. The wind is blowing, though not to hard.

"What do you like to do for fun, Kai?" I ask her, opening my left eye to look at her.

"Depends," She shrugs. "Some days I read, other's I entertain my sister, I run a lot, though."

"Your sister here?" I ask her.

"Yeah, she's 14 and over there." She points to a girl with two other people. 

I grin and hop off of the tree, Kai following behind me.

"What's her name?" I ask Kai.

"Emily." I nod as we get closer. All three of their backs are turned to us.

"Excuse me," I tap on the girls shoulder. "Are you Emily?"

Emily quickly turns around and her eyes widen, along with her friends. Emily doesn't hesitate to wrap her arms around my waist. I look at Kai, who is smiling at the sight. I feel tears on my shirt.

"Hey," I softly speak, bending down. "What's wrong, babe?"

"I-you just. You inspire m-me so m-much." Emily stutters. I smile and kiss her cheek. I hear multiple flashes go off, but I don't care. This is for Emily.

I wrap my arms around her, bringing her into my embrace. Emily hugs me back as she cries. I hold her for a couple of minuets, letting her calm down. As she pulls away, I see red lines on her wrist. I frown grabbing her wrist.

"Em.." I sigh. She breaks down crying again.

"I-I'm s-sorry.  I-uh-sorry." Emily cries. I look at Kai, who nods, telling me she knows about this.

"Baby, look at me," She looks up at me, tears streaming down her face. "You don't have to apologize for this, okay? Whatever you're going through, you're not alone. Just remember, they're multiple girls going through the same thing. You're not alone. You don't have to do this."

I roll her sleeves up, revealing her scars. She sobs and looks down.

"You're beautiful, don't let anyone tell you otherwise." I kiss each of her scars.

I look at Kai, who is silently crying, along with Emily's friends. I notice people recording the interaction.

"How about this," I offer. "You, your friends and your sister can come over and meet everyone else, yeah?"

Even though they're mad at me, I don't care. I'm doing the right thing here.

"Really?" Emily smiles.

"Yeah," I whisper, wiping her tears away. "Really."