Dear Scott

Chapter Twelve

Dear Scott,

I think I’m finally ready

I’m ready to move on

You’ll always be 

A dearest friend

But in my heart 

You no longer belong

I feel like if you wanted me

I’d be right here for you

A friend of your heart

Never more it seems

They ask me how I’m feeling

I have no idea, I swear

I want to admit what I feel in my heart

But how can I do that

When my feelings remain 

Locked deep inside

I just wish I could push harder

To fight for what I want

I wish I’d known 

You wouldn’t push me away

Too bad the time is gone

“What’ll it be?” Scott asked as we approached the concessions after buying our tickets.

“I don’t really want anything,” I shrugged my shoulders as the line neared the glass countertop. The light in the lobby was dim, setting an evening feel over all of the old fashioned furniture that was organized to look like a 1920s hotel lobby.

“You have to get something. We’re at the movies!” He looked down at me as he spoke matter-of-factly.

“But I don’t want anything,” I laughed, tilting my head to look up at him. 

“This is just NOT in the spirit of going to the movies. I’ll help you out,” he said as the person in front of us moved away from the counter. His eyes were full of youth as he said this; his smile playful and warm. Things like going to the movies brought out the cute, boyish side in him, the side of him that he tried to hide when he needed to be a hot senior guy at school. 

“Hey, what can I get you guys?” the clerk called out to us as we approached him.

“WE,” he emphasized ‘we’ as he smiled. “Would like a large soda and a box of Buncha Crunch.” 

I smiled politely as I added, “He would like all of that.” The cashier didn’t hear me as he began moving around, gathering up Scott’s order.

He turned to face me, staring down his nose at me with a stern look. “We are drinking all of this soda and nomming on all of those Buncha Crunches before we leave here.”

“Well you can,” I smiled up at him, being sassy just for the sake of wasting time while we waited.  

My hands were buried deep in my pockets as the order came and Scott traded it for his money. The calmness of the cinema was washing over me, getting me in the perfect mood to sit through a two hour long movie. We left the stand and neared the small archway to the hall containing each theater in silence. A chubby graying man took our tickets and broke them before handing them back with a nod. I began to turn towards our theater when Scott stopped walking.

“Where do you think you are going?” He played up a confused face as he held his box of goodies near his chest.

“To the movie?” I shrugged my shoulders. What? Were we not going to see the movie anymore? I tilted my head at him, confused as to what he meant by stopping me from going to the movie.