Dear Scott

Chapter Thirteen

Dear Scott,

From the start I cared

I cared for you

And you never cared for me

You sat there and pretended

While I sat a fool in love

So please don’t sit so passively 

And watch me shed my tears

We ignore the world as it speeds by

We pretend we don't exist

Our hopes and dreams flow freely

Our fears and regrets dismissed

I always carry the burden

Both yours and mine alike

I carry the weight of the world

It's true, I made it so

I feel it build inside my chest

The pain of all these months 

I close my eyes and feel ready

So ready to let it go

I wish upon the starts above

To the trees and to the wind

To allow it all to blow away

Yet deep inside the traces lie

Never to fade completely away

“Missy! It is time to wake up!” My mother’s voice pierced my eardrums as I covered my ears with my pillow.

“Mom,” I whined. 

“Don’t you start whining at me! It’s way past time to wake up,” she threw the curtains open, shedding a soft mid-morning light over my face.

Closing my eyes, I argued, “Mom, it’s Sunday.” The sun was warm on my face as I lay there on my back, the covers pulled close to my neck.

“I don’t care what day it is. There are things to be done and it’s almost noon. This is the last time you go out for a late night movie! Now wake up,” she scolded, slamming the door as she stomped out.

Rolling over on to my stomach, I let the warm sheets soak me up again. At some point, my hair had fallen out of the messy bun I threw it up into the night before and was now tangled around my face and neck. I reached my arms forward through my mane of hair, gracing my bedpost as I stretched. What an amazing sleep. 

Shifting to my right, I let my back land on the throw pillow that I had been too lazy to take off the bed the night before. I felt a hard lump in the mattress behind me. In an attempt to figure out what it was, I reached around awkwardly to grab it. My hand immediately held my phone tight as I unplugged it from the charger and removed it from behind me, pulling it close to my face. I squinted as the phone lit up, a little too close to my face after just waking up. Sliding it open, I read the message from Scott that I assumed was from last night after I had fallen asleep.

Morning Bully! 

Falling onto my stomach again, I felt my face being eaten by the pillow. I sucked in slowly, letting my lungs fill with air. I held my breath for only a second, before letting it go with a soft shriek. What if I was the first thing he had thought about that morning? The butterflies within me grew excited for the first time that day, beating along the edges of my stomach. What if? What if! My mind was about to tumble through a ring of emotions before I pulled myself together to respond.