All I Ever Wanted

• 23 •

Pabalik-balik ako sa living room. Anong oras na? Bakit di pa rin bumabalik si Kale? Quarter to eleven na. Ganun ba katagal kumain ng pizza?

Nang hindi na ako makatiis, lumabas na ako ng porch. Dito ko na lang aantayin si Kale. Umupo ako sa may railings at sumandal sa poste sa gilid. Anong oras naman kaya uuwi si Kale?

Mga sampung minuto din siguro akong naghintay dun nang biglang bumukas ang gate. And then Kale entered. I felt my heart throb fastly. Bakit para bang kinakabahan ako na ewan? I couldn't explain what I feel.

When he finally closed the gate, Kale turned around and did a double take when he saw me. I thought he would just ignore me. But to my surprise, he didn't. In fact, he walked over to me. Kale stopped when he was just in a good three-feet distance. I just stared at him, maybe, waiting for him to say something.

"Bakit nandito ka pa sa labas?" tanong niya.

"Um...," nahinto ako. Ano bang isasagot ko kay Kale? Kasi inaantay kita.

Kaya ko bang sabihin yun? Parang hindi.

"Nagpapahangin lang," pagsisinungaling ko. Hay. Di ko nga kayang sabihin ang totoo.

Tumango lang si Kale. Akala ko may sasabihin pa siya pero gaya ko, pinili nya ring manahimik at tumingin sa ibaba. Ang tahimik. Sobrang tahimik.

Iopen-up ko na kaya kung kanina? At magsorry na rin dahil nagdecide ako tungkol sa date niya kay Carmen nang hindi hinihingi ang desisyon niya.

"Uh... Kale."

"Maika."

Yung totoo, lagi na lang ba kaming magsasabay?

"Sige ikaw muna," sabi ko kay Kale.

He scratched the back of his head then put his hands on his pockets. Then afterwards, he looked up at me, in the eyes. "Sorry about earlier. I... I should've not said those things. Sorry."

I just looked at him, surprised.

Honestly, I didn't expect him to apologize.

"Sorry din at nasigawan kita... And you know for blaming everything on you. I know gusto mo lang makatulong," patuloy niya.

"Sorry din Kale. I mean sa nangyari kanina," sabi ko sa kanya tapos nagbaba ako ng tingin. "You're right. I should've considered you... I should've asked you about it. And I didn't. Sorry for being insensitive."

Hindi ko alam kung kelan nakalapit si Kale. Pero bigla ko na lang naramdaman ang kamay niya sa mukha ko.

"You're crying... again," he muttered then wiped my tears away.

Umiiyak ako?

Kale removed his hand from my face but stayed on his position, remaining close to me. And when I looked up to see him, he was looking at me intently. Napalunok ako. Why suddenly it became awkward? Him being this close. Him looking at me like that.

"So... a-are we good now?" I asked him, trying to shrug the awkwardness away.

That seemed snapped Kale out from what he was thinking. He took a step back then messed his hair.

Tumango siya. "Yeah."

I smiled. Nakahinga na rin ako ng maluwag. Finally, Kale and I were okay.

"No more fights?" tanong ko ulit.

Kale sighed then said, "No more fights."

I smiled wider.

I jumped from the railings and hugged Kale on his waist, leaning my head against his chest.

"H-hey!" he seemed shocked. "Anong ginagawa mo?"

"H-Hugging you," I answered, stating the obvious.

He chuckled and I felt his chest vibrate.

"Anong sinabi ko sayo? Bawal chansing diba?" sabi niya tapos naramdaman ko ang dalawa niyang kamay sa likod ko.

"I'm just happy that we're okay," sagot ko, not minding what he previously said.

I felt Kale arms tighten on me, but not crushing me. Then he put his chin on top of my head.

I closed my eyes. There was nothing I could hear but the loud beating of my heart. There was nothing I could feel but happiness. This.

Isa ito sa mga pagkakataon na nagiging malinaw sa akin kung anong nararamdaman ko. Kung ano nga bang lagay ng puso ko pagdating kay Kale. And that is...

All out of a sudden, we both heard something ring. And by the sound of it, it was a ringtone. Kale's ringtone. Kale and I pulled away. He got his phone, looked at the caller ID and answered the call.

"Hey!... Yeah, nasa bahay na ako. Ikaw?... Okay... Yeah, good night... Okay lang... Where?... Okay. See you then... Bye."

After that call, Kale put his phone back to his pocket.

"Si Carmen?" tanong ko. Ewan, pero malakas lang ang pakiramdam ko na ito ang tumawag kay Kale.

And he confirmed it when he nodded.

"Kumusta pala ang naging date niyo? I mean, it was the first time you actually stayed that long."

He smiled briefly. "It went well. Carmen's fine. Pretty, fun to talk with, and sweet."

I felt a pang of jealousy after hearing those words. Kale never complimented me the way he did to Carmen. Well, never niya pa naman talaga ako binigyan ng compliment.

"Well... T-That's good!" I tried to sound like I'm happy about it. "Finally, may naging successful din sa mga dates mo."

"Yeah," came his too short reply.

I bit my lip. "So... I suppose there'd be an another date?"

Kale sighed then nodded. "Yes. Actually, we're going to see each other tomorrow."

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