Truth or Dare ||Lesbian Story|| ||First Book||『EDITING』

Chapter 8

Previously

But no, when I heard a moan, a yelp of delight, from her, it came to me at once. I could never stop now; I will try to take claim of Pamela as mine, try not letting the one she's searching for take the glory of having this damsel as theirs. But fuck, I realized more things than my will to fight for Pamela.

I'm a fool, a fool in love.

––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––

『Pamela 』

Maybe I was really out of my head, perhaps I'm acting in such idiocy that I may have forgotten there's limit I need to act upon on. Still, the need to have her close was blinding me, controlling my want; my desire to just confess what it was that I shared with her was no game. Still I insist on keeping it to myself, let my burden be known slowly until taken noticed.

While still in the crisis back in Paris, I didn't really stay faithful. How can I, really, when all that I am in those past 11 years was a lone girl romanticizing about one who knows nothing of my existent then?

I tried to fill this void by looking pass this affinity, I strayed and tried to find the anyone that can level my own affection but as those tries keeps with failure, that I either end up alone in the bed in the morning or that they uses me for fame and money that I don't need to keep for my own, I learned that nothing can compare.

I acted such a fool back then.

I was desperate, yes, and my father knows that too but as he says, there was nothing he could do in fear of me leaving him too, I know that he's scared for me but I manage to prove that I'm brave, that I'm keen to make this step on my own.

I want, I need, and I long for the past, for the feeling of it to come back to me. I was an empty machine that simply moves without its gasoline but only have so many failures that my life becomes vain, drain out.

Then, my prayers were heard. I have someone so close now and I plan to keep this going, keep her for myself even I seen the signs wrongly. Her warmth was vibrating, too tempting to be far from and too right to be labeled wrong.

I guess I'm really desperate...

––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––

Merely waking up, the coldness in the air lingers. It makes me search for someone to hold, to feel one's heat in the morning glory but, I'm alone in this misery. I stared in the distance, watching the sunlight pass through the red curtains.

With a yawn, my alarm belted. I groan at its ringing, making me question my need for such thing since I'm likely a morning person, only to remember my reasons last night. I plan to escort Sophia to her school to talk to her. With that, I stood up and begin rampaging through my closet.

Finding clothes that I find enough to catch Sophia's eyes; I was satisfied with the look and shower with heated water. I hum in the shower, going along with the instrumental song going on to the speaker that I had compose in my years in Paris, playing any musical instrument was my escape, my beautiful distraction and sometimes, just for the fun of it, I'd play some of my notes in public, under the disguise I manage to keep until the age of 15.