A Sense of Hope

Chapter One: The Beginning

         

I woke up startled to a raindrop splattering onto my nose. As I cracked my eyes open, I could feel the cold winter breeze racking through out my skinny body. I had slept in the dirty alley way as long as I could remember. This was my home. I had ran away from my abusive orphanage when I was sixteen and now four years later, I had still managed to barely stay alive.

Everyday I still ponder on the fact of why my real parents had left me in the care of those cruel people. Did they hate me that much to leave me or did they regret having me? Surely they did because look at where I am now.

But back in that hell hole, Mrs. Rancid, the owner of the orphanage, would always pick on me since I was the oldest. Mrs.Rancid was around her 50's and had black hair with light gray hair. To make things more scarier she also had black irises that would cut into your soul when you glanced into her eyes. Her wrinkling skin made her look meaner and due to the fact that she has a big pointy nose, it made her look like a witch, hence its why I decided to name her Witch.

Everyday I would have to wake early and cook breakfast for everyone including that witch. I was also in charged of cleaning the place up and every time I disobeyed or forgot to do a task, the Witch would always beat me up. Through those multiple beatings I had received a few broken ribs, purple bruises, and nasty scars that are forever engraved onto my body.

I always protected the younger ones because I knew they did not deserve the awful treatment from the Witch. Her beatings were part of her daily pleasures. It was as if the pain and torture that the Witch inflicted on us was a fun game to her.

Being there and taking all the beatings, I was viewed as their hero since I was the only one who had loved and protected them their entire life. I felt like I was a parent to those children even though I was a mere 16 year old.

But my image as their hero soon stopped. The Witch decided that the children were depending on me too much so she threatened to harm a five year old with a knife to the throat if I did not leave the orphanage. I didn't want to leave them because they were the closet family I had ever had but I had no choice. So I left. That was one of the worst days in my life. Leaving those children behind broke my heart. So I promised that one day I will return and take them all into loving care.

As I walked out of the orphanage I was afraid what would happen to the children but more importantly I was afraid for myself. What will I do with no money, clothes, and a home?

I have spent many times trying to find a decent job as a waitress but to no luck, I was left still homeless and jobless. No one wanted to employ me. Everyday I was losing hope and became more depressed with my life.

School was a whole other thing. I never went to school. The Witch did not allow us to goto school because she was afraid of one of us telling a teacher how she treated us. Plus the orphanage did not have enough money to be able to send the children to school.

Since I couldn't find a job I went to search for homeless shelters to stay at. I left the first day I had arrived there. I remember walking out of the restrooms and saw two drunk men walking towards me. They tried talking to me at first but then it all escalated. They tried to take advantage of me but thankfully after a little struggle I was able to escape them. Ever since then I had never stepped foot into another shelter.

After that incident I decided to live in the alley way because it was the only thing I could afford. I do not like living out here but at least its better than nothing.

Just as I kept pondering these thoughts, the rain began to pour all a sudden. My whole body and dirty clothes were drenched from head to toe. I began shivering and began to pocket my pants for any spare change that I have saved from begging on the streets. I fished out six dollars and thirty cents. It was enough for me to get a hot cup of tea for a dollar and twenty cents at the coffee shop down the street.

As I stood up, my muscles screamed in protest from the awkward sleeping position I was in. I stretched my tired limbs and began to head off towards the coffee shop. People began to stare at me in disgust but I've learned to ignore their looks due to the years of being homeless.

As I was walking I wondered how it would like to be someone else. Someone who is rich and doesn't need to worry if they will make it to the next day with no money or food. Someone who has a nice comfy bed to sleep in at night and most importantly to have someone who loves you . At that though my tears began to fall because at that point I realized that I had no one to love me. I felt like I was going to die and end up all alone for the rest of my life.

As more tears began to fall, it began to rain harder. My tears were mixed with the rain. It felt like the world was crying with me because it felt my sadness.

Clutching my body, I began to walk faster to the coffee shop so I could get warm. All a sudden without looking before crossing, I felt something hit my body full force. It knocked me down onto the wet road. Pain was coursing through out my body. My vision became fuzzy and black dots began to consume my vision. It felt as if I was going to die at that moment. Is this how it feels to die? Will my suffer finally come to an end?

I began to hear someone shout, specifically a man. He was cussing and shouting for someone to call for help.

"Please someone call 911!"

"Hurry!" the man shouted.

"It hurts. Please make it stop." I moaned.

A crowd began to surround us and in the far distance I could hear an ambulance. The man that was yelling came in front of me and crouched down shaking me to try to keep me awake.

"Don't close your eyes on me!" he shouted when my lids began to droop.

"Help is coming. God I'm so sorry. Please be okay."

"It hurts. Please make it stop",  I whimpered.

When I glanced up at him I was in awe. He was a very handsome man. So handsome that he could be described as a God. The man had brown hair, a clean chiseled jaw, and kissable lips. When I made contact with his blue eyes, it was like the whole world had stopped and froze. It seemed like it was just me and him. I could see his worry and what seemed to appear like love? How could he love someone he just met? Especially me?

I began to feel tired and everything around me was spinning. I felt like I was being held by someone because they were shaking me and pleading at me to stay awake. Then everything began to go black. The only thing at that point that came to my mind was the fact that my pain was finally coming to an end.