Desires of Men ~SEQUEL TO THE LIFE I LIVE~

Hen-Stealing

"What am I supposed to do first?" Albert asked, paging through the strange book. The delicate drawings inside looked to be decades, maybe even centuries, old. Shachi and Penguin were leaned up against a wood fence, staring up at the sky. Penguin scratched his nose.

"Hmm...well, you're not gonna know anything 'miraculous' the first time so we probably have to set the first one up." The three men glanced around, wondering what they could do. In the distance, an older woman tended to her chickens and hens. She spread seed over the ground with a small smile, watching as the birds had their fill. Crouching down, she pat her hand on one's head lightly and then returned to her house.

"What if we steal a few of her birds?" Albert wondered, rubbing his chin with his finger. The engineers hummed.

"What does that have to do with anything though?" Albert looked over as if they were idiots.

"It's pretty obvious. We steal one of the birds, she'll think that someone stole it-"

"Because we did steal it." Shachi interrupted.

"Shut up!" He flicked him on the nose. "We steal the bird and she'll start asking if people know where it is. I'll come up and use my powers as a seer to tell her where the bird is."

"It's not much but it's a start." Penguin commented, standing and stretching. The other two did the same and looked around for the old woman. She was still inside the house.

"Alright go and steal a hen." Shachi pointed towards the yard, and Albert looked up in surprise.

"I-I thought you guys were gonna help me?" They shook their head.

"We can only guide you in the right direction. If you want to accomplish something and do it right, you have to do it yourself."

"Fine." The man pouted, turning towards the yard once more. Once Albert was out of earshot, Penguin turned to his friend.

"How long do we have to help this guy?" Shachi shrugged, whispering back in return.

"Captain just said to keep it going as long and as hyped up as possible. So, whatever that means." Penguin sighed and crossed his arms.

"I'm getting tired of this guy. He's kind of...boring I guess."

"Yeah, I know what you mean." The two followed Albert to the chicken pen and watched him climb over with great difficulty.

"You don't wanna make too much noise or the old lady will come back out." Penguin advised.

"Right." Albert grunted, struggling to get himself the rest of the way over the fence. Shaking their heads in unison, the engineers helped push Albert over the fence and onto the dirt on the other side.

"Oof!" He grunted, his behind hitting the dirt. Rubbing his backside, he slowly picked himself up and looked around. "Which one should I take?"

"Umm..." They looked all of the birds over. "That black one over there. It's the only black bird so she should notice immediately that it's gone."

The bird in question was a large hen with a sharp beak, more than likely able to cause a few scratches and bruises with its claws and beak. Albert gulped and resigned himself to his task.

Taking cautious steps forward with his hands out, he stared down the black hen. "Here, chicken, chicken, chicken..." He cooed. The hen cocked her head back and forth, clucking every few seconds.

Albert was almost within arm's reach of the hen and she cawed and began to run away. "No!" He shouted, chasing after the fleeing bird. "Come back here!"

While Albert ran around the pen, dodging upset chickens and trying to snatch up the black hen, Shachi and Penguin placed their hands over their eyes and shook their heads.

"He's beyond help." Shachi muttered.

"Why even try?" Penguin commented.

The front yard was a ruckus, and the two Heart Pirates were surprised that the old woman didn't come running out of her house. The bird chase lasted for all of five minutes without anyone noticing them, somehow, and finally Albert caught the black hen by the leg triumphantly.

"I got it!"

"Good, now run!" The pirates yelled, noticing a shadow behind a window of the house. They ran away, leaving the wannabe-seer in the yard holding the hen.

"Hey, wait!" He yelled, clambering over the fence with the bird in hand.

"Are you sure she didn't see us?" Albert asked through heavy breathing, placing a hand on his chest to slow his heartbeat.

"Yeah, I looked back and she just continued to feed the chickens. We're safe." Penguin huffed, coughing out the phlegm in his lungs.

"Where are we gonna do with the chicken now?" Shachi stood up from the ground, carefully taking the chicken from Albert's hands. "We have to hide it somewhere."

"There's an old tree on the edge of the woods with a big hole in the middle. If we get some sort of net and put it over the top, we can turn it into a cage of sorts." The con said, standing up himself.

"Sounds as good as any other option." The three set off towards the forest, careful not to be seen by any of the townspeople or the old woman. Along the way, they took a net from a nearby fishing stand without the man noticing.

The forest was set back a little ways from the town, but it was no more than a five minute walk away. The trees were tall and healthy, sporting vibrant green leaves. Flowers dotted the edge of the forest line, splashing the grass with pinks and red and whites.

The tree Albert had mentioned stood on the very edge of the woods. Just as he'd said, a large knot had been hollowed out and a big hole, the perfect size for the hen, formed. The three went up to it.

"You got the net?" Shachi asked, and Penguin hefted it up in a ready position. Albert clutched the chicken tightly, placing it in the hole.

"I'm gonna let go and you nail the net in place." The engineers nodded, preparing themselves. "Ready? One, two, three!"

Thrusting the chicken deep into the hole, Shachi and Penguin tightened the net over the hole, trying to hold back the resisting chicken. Somehow, without letting the chicken go, they managed to hold the net to the tree securely. Stepping back to survey their handiwork, they wiped the sweat from their foreheads. The chicken flapped it's wings in an attempt to escape, but the net held.

"Well, now what?" Albert asked. Suddenly, a woman's voice was heard from the town.

"My hen's been stolen! Has anyone seen it?"

~~~

Arriving in: 24 days