The Fault in Our Kifflom

Chapter 10 - Metaphor

Over the course of the weekend, I picked up the Enus Super Diamond and the Dinka Double-T motorcycle that Cris wanted and took them to the garage. I drank for most of the Monday to cure my nerves. Again.

***

Tuesday came around too quickly. I sat by the pool staring into the water, trying to control my nerves. I balled my hands into fists to stop them from shaking. It was pathetic; I'm a grown man goddamnit. I've dealt with so many women before but never had anyone had an effect like this on me. Not even Amanda...

My phone let out a shrill noise as it reminded me it was time to go, interrupting me from my thoughts. I hauled myself off the couch, grabbing the jacket to my suit as I walked to the door. I decided to walk; it was a particularly beautiful day in sunny Los Santos, and I still needed some time to calm myself.

Of course, the walk didn't calm me, though. Instead, it made me feel as though I was about to collapse. I considered turning around, telling Marnie I was sick and couldn't make it, but instead, my legs kept carrying me in the direction of the Epsilon building until I could hear the music blaring from some unseen speakers.

As I walked into the building, I made the conscious decision to take the stairs instead of the elevator. It shone an ugly gold tint under the white fluorescent lights and made me feel slightly sick. Standing in it for any amount of time may have made me expel the alcoholic remains of my stomach up those polished walls.

I let out a slight pant as I wandered down the several flights of stairs that lead me to the basement (or The Literal Heart of Cris - depending on how you looked at it.) I grabbed a cookie to soak up the remaining alcohol and a paper cup filled with lemonade - this was starting to feel more like a kids party, what's next? Musical chairs and a beanbag toss?...

I turned around, not quite sure what to do with myself. I didn't really know anyone here apart from Marnie and Dr Friedlander, and I certainly wasn't going to hang with my therapist anytime soon (he wasn't even her yet so hanging with him would be pretty hard...). I didn't want to look desperate either so I stayed where I was, leaning my back against the unpainted wall and keeping my eyes focused on my drink, watching the bubbles pop on the top. I glanced up, noticing the increase in the noise in the room suddenly. A large crowd of people had begun to gather, and cheap, plastic chairs had been placed in a circle. I glanced around the room, hoping to see Marnie somewhere. Scanning my eyes across the room, I noticed her stood with a group of other official Epsilon members, all clad in blue polo's and necklaces with the Epsilon symbol on. As I watched, I noticed her glance over at me more than once. My heart was practically beating out of my chest, she just kept looking...were they talking about me? I began to panic slightly, checking my shirt for stains and fixing my hair, realising just how childish I looked with my cookie and soda. God damn it, Michael.

Once their group fell silent, I noticed Marnie began to stare. Directly at me. Directly. Oh my god. I looked back at her and our eyes locked. Her cheeks were a perfect shade of pink and she had the most beautiful, crooked smile when she laughed at comments made by the group. Her eyes glinted a beautiful sky blue under the dull basement lights, and her blonde hair was pulled back into a ponytail that showed off every delicate detail of her face.

I suddenly realised that I'd been staring like a creep for a hell of a lot longer than what was considered normal. Fuck. I pulled my phone from my pocket quickly to check the time. 4 pm and no sign of Friedlander. Typical, his own group and he couldn't even turn up on time. I glanced up again to see people beginning to move towards the plastic chairs in the circle. I took one last sip from my cup before plucking up the courage to move. Pushing myself from the wall I was leaning against, I looked cautiously over to see where Marnie was, only to see her walking towards me. She smiled as she caught my gaze, continuing to move through the hordes of people. As she walked, a guy in a blue polo like her grabbed her arm.