Who Will Save The Alpha?

Chapter Eighteen: You're Your Own Worst Enemy

I gasp for air as I appear in the middle of ruins, and the Dread Doctors are no where to be seen. "Hello," I call out, but the sound just bounces off causing an echo. I investigate the area, but it is so lifeless that vines haven't grown in ages. It is completely silent except for my footsteps and my breathing. I sigh, "This is worse than being surrounded by people." I sit on a piece of rubble because I didn't find an opening anywhere. I can barely see, so I bring my red eyes to see the exact same thing, but vividly. I don't know where I am, or if I would howl, that anyone would hear me, but it's worth a shot. I roar as loud as I can, and everything starts to shake, so I'm left with the hope that someone heard me. "Please," I think out loud. I think of what I could possibly do, and all I can think of is breaking the walls, but I can't be certain if I could make it out without being crushed. I begin to doubt myself and become fearful, "What if they couldn't hear me? What if I'm stuck here? What if I starve to death? What if this only the beginning, and the worst is yet to come?"

"GET OUT OF MY HEAD," I roar angrily as I realize the voices in my head aren't my own. A loud cackle echoes off the walls and in my head, and the smell of fresh blood fills the room causing me to breathe through my mouth. "What's wrong? I thought you would be use to the smell," the voice says, and it sounds like my own. I spin around searching for the person I must have missed and growl, "Who are you?" "Sweetheart, I'm you," she says. I growl, "You can't be me." "Would you like to see for yourself," she chuckles. I roar, "Stop playing your silly mind games, and face me." "I don't think so," she says, "It's so much fun." "Stop it," I roar louder causing some dust and debris to fall. I jump out of the way before a pillar could fall onto me, and she laughs maniacally, "You're so mentally ill, sweetheart. What makes you think you could raise your children?" "Atleast I'm not running away from my responsibilities," I say, "And I'm not running from you." "It's kinda hard to run away from yourself," she chuckles. I sigh, "It's not hard. It's impossible." "Do you think you're ready to face your demons," she says like I'm a five year old. I growl, "Have I ever had a choice?" "No, I just thought I'd make it seem like you did," she chuckles lowly.

The voice manifests itself like taking all the shadows out of the room and making a body looking exactly like me but with pitch black eyes. "Do you still think I'm not you," she asks looking into my eyes, and I just stand there. I say, "I believe you are someone who takes the concept of me to a new level." "Sweetheart, I'm just the thing you've been trying to suppress," she says with a sad smile, "but you can't do that. You never could really." "I already know that, you ignoramus," I growl. She tsks and says, "That's no way to talk to yourself." "Because you're really me, of course," I laugh, "I suppose you're here to get me to let go." She smirks and sits on the piece of rubble that I just got off of. I smile widely, "Who are you really?" "I'm you," she says and gets in my face, "We really do have trust issues." "I do, but you're not me," I growl, and she nods turning into Allison. She smiles, "What gave me away?" "I may not know myself that well, but I know my demons the best," I say flatly taking a step toward her as she steps back, "Even though I have to suppress them." "You're just like your brother," she says turning into a Stiles. I smile, "I'm worse." "Yes, you are, but he's closer than you would think," he chuckles crossing his arms. I feel my rage swell inside of me as I take the last step to close the distance and grab his shirt, "I think you underestimate what I suppress." "I think you underestimate what your brother suppresses," he chuckles turning into shadow again. I roar as the rage deepens, "Why are you running?"

The laugh echoes taunting me, and it claws at my sanity. I roar, "Stop it!" "Why would I do that," the thing chuckles, "I want you to let yourself go. Just lose your mind." "No," I say and take a deep breath to regain some grip. I still feel the rage bubbling at the edges, and it knows it. "Come on, Stephanie," it screams, "You're already fraying." "No," I say calmly, "I will make it out of this with my humanity and not my insanity." "I'm afraid you can't lose that, my dear," it laughs, and I grimace and sit quietly just ignoring it. It continues going on and on digging at me consistently, and I pretend like I'm unfazed. Eventually, it becomes silent leaving me to reside in the darkest part of my mind, and I gradually let the rage build and build.

"Are you sure you're not going to leave without losing yourself," it asks giggling. I laugh, "I've never lost myself. I'm always me. That's where you get this confused." "What do you mean," the voice manifests again as me. I smirk, "Don't you see, I have a complicated mental state. My brain has a complexity about it that you couldn't imagine." "I don't know if I believe you," she says crouching in front of me. I smile widely, "Then you aren't as knowledgeable about me as you thought." "Maybe you're just an excellent actress," she says dissipating, and I just laugh maniacally as the room darkens again. I roar, "I'm just crazy, sweetheart." My blood is boiling because I'm tired of being captured, and I know I'm not going to miss my mother's wedding. I get up and charge at the wall, and it vanishes showing me in a cage.

"You seem quite insane," a man in a white suit says. I giggle, "You have no idea." "I'm pretty sure I do, and your baby should be someone else's," he says, and I bend the bars. He looks fearfully at me, and I laugh, "I'm sure you don't, and it is my child." He runs out of a door, and I follow him. I call, "Are you frightened?" "No, I'm just running for the hell of it," he says sarcastically. I growl, "I'm certain that you're stupidity will get you killed." "I thought you were against killing people," he trips and stares up at me. I look at him blankly, "Maybe you should pass on a message." "Anything," he begs causing me to smile. I say, "I will not be a prisoner, and no one will touch my child. If anyone attempts, I will kill them then hunt you down for not getting the message across. Do you understand me?" "Yes, ma'am," he says, and bare my fangs. I growl, "Good." He just lays there, and I say, "Lead me out of here." "Y-Yes, ma'am," he stutters, and I frown. I state, "Don't talk, just get me out of here." He gets up quietly, and I follow him out of the bright maze into the night. "Good boy, now run and tell everyone what I told you," I say and walk away with my insanity and rage still brewing inside.

I make it to Brett's house, and nobody is home. I scream out to release some of my madness, and the loneliness becomes evident. I think out loud, "they're probably looking for me... No, they're not... Yes, they are.. Stop it!" My voice echoes, and I sit down on the couch. The door opens causing me to turn toward the door, and Brett stares at me in astonishment, "Steph?" "That's me," I smile standing up. He looks at me concerned, "What happened to you?" "I've lost my mind," I cry, "I made the man in the white suit pass on a message to his friends. I'll kill anyone who tries to hold me captive or tries to take my baby." "Woah.. Stephanie," he says marching up to me and pulls me into a hug, "Let's get some sleep, beautiful." "Do you think sleep will cure my madness," I ask looking into his eyes. He sighs, "I have faith."