Where My Heart Is... [BoyxBoy]

Chapter Six

~Tommy~

I had no idea why I did what I just did. Kissing Kevin was not what I went over there to do. I had to admit that it kind of felt good. I shook my head to get that ridiculous thought out of my mind. I was walking down the pathway back to my car when I spotted Ashley. I thought Kevin said she was coming back tomorrow. I tried to walk faster and get in my car before she saw me but it was too late, she already had.

"Tom? Is that you?" she said trying to make out my face in the darkness.

"Yea Ash. I've got to go. Bye." I ran as fast as I could to my car. I didn't want her to ask me questions that I myself didn't even know the answers to.

I got in my car and sped off. I don't know why I did that. It felt like the right thing to do at the time. I kissed him but I wasn't gay. What did this mean? I was confused. I needed to get out of here.

I pulled into my driveway and went into the house. All the lights were off so I figured everyone was asleep. I walked up the stairs quietly so I didn't wake anybody up. I got to my room and I saw Chad sitting on his bed reading a book. He looked up when he heard me coming in.

"Tom, where were you? I tried calling but it went straight to voicemail." He said putting his book on his bedside table.

"Uh yea, my phone's battery died." I said walking over to my bed and taking off my shoes.

"Okay, but you still didn't answer my other question. Where did you go?"

"I was at Kevin's house."

"Really? I thought you guys were fighting." He said raising an eyebrow.

"We are, or we were. I don't know anymore."

"How can you not know? Didn't you guys kiss and make up?"

My eyes went wide at his comment. "Uh...why would you say that? We didn't kiss. Who told you that?"

"Dude chill. I was just asking if you guys made up. What's up with you lately? You're not your usual self."

"I'm just... I'm confused okay? I mean I've been going through so many emotions I don't even know where I stand anymore." I said dropping my head into my hands.

"Tom, we're cousins remember? You can tell me anything. I know we've had rough patches along the way, but we're still family and I'm here for you." He said coming over to my bed and putting a hand on my shoulder.

"He's gay."

"Huh? Gay? Who is?"

"Him. Kevin. Kevin is gay."

There was a look of pure shock on his face. "Oh I see. And the problem is?"

Did I just hear him correctly? Was he implying that there wasn't a problem with my best friend being gay? Okay I admit, I've gotten used to it but that didn't mean I didn't have a problem with it.

"Are you kidding me right now? He. Is. Gay. Maybe you didn't hear me."

"I heard you just fine. So what if he's gay? He's still the same Kevin that he was all those years ago. He's your best friend Tom and I think you should just learn to accept it."

I looked up at him and I believed him. I understood. Of course Kevin was still my best friend. And I got it now; it was me that was pushing him away. I caused this.

"There's another thing, he's...he's in love with me." I looked down again this time playing with my fingers. "When I found out I called him a faggot and kicked him out. I regretted it immediately after. I wanted to go after him but I guess my pride got in the way.