Poems collection -Self harm (trigger warning)

The Real Horror

I hear the words again and again,
"You're getting better!"
"You're doing great!"
And that may be true,
But the real horror is,
Trying to be normal.

For so long I've been free in fantasy,
Trapped in fake cages
Burnt alive in phantom flames.
I made my own world.
But now the real horror is,
I have to fit in.

Follow the leader,
I do as I must,
But the thoughts get jumbled,
And the Leader becomes
A whole other person,
Now the real horror is,
Am I getting worse?

"Do this" "Do that"
The orders keep piling in,
First it's extra school work,
Then it's obsessive organising,
Moving onto harmful thoughts.
The real horror is,
No one believes me.

Leader controls my every move,
Snarling at me at every turn.
"No more writing."
I am told.
"It is time for something else."
Is this the real horror,
Of being normal?

25/12/15