A Rainy Tuesday || larry

Twenty One.

Harry sits at his kitchen table and eats his cereal alone. His parents are still asleep and he plans on letting them sleep. His mother is clearly worried about him lately and that's understandable considering he didn't get out of bed for a few days. He moves his cheerios around his bowl with his spoon and he slowly chews each mouthful he manages to put in his mouth.

"Going to school today?" His mothers voice breaks his trance and he turns to look over at her. She's wearing her pajamas and he slippers. Her hair is messy and her face makeup-less and Harry still thinks he has the most beautiful mom because he does and he loves her a lot.

"Yeah. Can't fail my senior year, right?" Harry tries to say it jokingly, but it comes out monotone and pathetic. His mom gives him a worried look and she walks over and gently starts to play with his hair. Harry relaxes and closes his eyes. He just feels safe in his mothers presence.

"I love you, you know that right? I love you always and nothing will change that," she informs him softly. Her voice almost sounds like a lullaby and Harry ever so slightly nods his head at her words. "If you need to come home today or there's any problems call me."

"I will, mom. I should be fine though. Zayn and Louis will be there," he reminds her and she laughs softly and he peaks up at her to see her smiling down at him.

"Friends are great, but no one can comfort you like a mom."

•••

Zayn is waiting at Harry's locker when the boy finally arrives at school. He doesn't even greet him, he just pulls Harry into a hug and holds him for a long time. Harry smells the cigarettes and cologne on him and he hugs him back just as tight.

"You okay?" Zayn whispers in his ear and Harry swallows his tears and nods.

"Yeah, I'm okay. I'm going to be okay. We're all okay," Harry whispers and it's a small reminder to himself as well. Zayn slowly pulls away from him and his brown eyes show nothing but worry and love for his friend. Harry gives him a smile and nods his head before turning to his locker. He can do this. He can be himself again. He opens his locker and throws his sweater and his bag in there. He grabs his textbooks and checks himself in his small mirror before he turns back to his friend and shuts his locker.

"Let's go," he grins. Zayn just smiles back at him and the two start to walk down the hall. Harry asks about what he missed and Zayn fills him in on everything. Harry laughs at the gossip and he starts to feel alive again. He truly feels better with his best friend as he walks down the halls that haunt his dreams. He's learning to be stronger.

"Hey, Harry, can I steal you," Niall's voice asks. Harry turns to see the boy standing behind them and he bites his lip and looks back down the hall. He doesn't want to be late for class, but he's missed so much school lately he really doesn't think it'll matter.

"Sure. I'll see you at lunch, Z," Harry waves goodbye to his friend and then turns back to Niall. He doesn't know what the boy has to talk to him about, but he hopes it's something good. Niall starts to lead him away from the crowds of people and into a corner by the end of the hall. Harry just waits for the boy to start talking first and Niall looks nervous.

"I just want to say sorry. I've been shitty to you for years and honestly it's because I like you. Not in like that way, but in a friendship way. I just don't know how to be like a normal friend so I just picked on you instead. I also have no filter so I'm sorry for all the stupid shit I have said and probably will say. Can we just be good? We're basically neighbours and I think Zayn and Liam have been fucking on my couch so like we should be good," Niall rambles. Harry chokes on the Zayn part and Niall laughs at his shocked expression.

"They're doing it on your couch?" Harry asks in horror and Niall shrugs carelessly.

"Think so. Haven't caught them yet. Anyways we cool? I'm tired of pretending I don't enjoy your stupid jokes," Niall grins and Harry laughs and nods.

"Yeah we're good and my jokes are not stupid," Harry tells him seriously. Niall snorts as he starts to walk again and Harry follows beside him.

•••

"Hey," Louis smiles at him as he moves to stand next to his locker. Harry smiles at just the sound of his voice and he looks over to see Louis' sparkling blue eyes looking fondly up at him. "Good to see your pretty face back at school," Louis continues and Harry blushes at the compliment.

"I've been feeling good today," Harry tells him softly. Louis' hand moves out to grab Harrys books from him and Harry blushes at the fact that a boy is actually carrying his books.

"I'm happy to hear that, love. What class do you have?" Louis asks.

"I have a spare, so I'm just going to the library to catch up," Harry explains. Louis nods and continues to follow Harry to their destination. Harry sits down and gives Louis a look when the boy follows his lead.

"Don't you have class?" Harry wonders and Louis shakes his head. His face pales and he seems upset at just the mention. Harry reaches out and grabs the boys hand and Louis just squeezes his fingers.

"I have gym. I don't really go anymore. I'm seeing if I can drop it or switch it," Louis admits and Harry feels a pang in his heart at how small Louis sounds when saying that. He leans forward and kisses his forehead and gently holds the boy to his chest.

"If you drop it we can have spare together," Harry tells him to try and cheer him up and he can feel a small puff of breath on his neck from Louis' small laugh.

"That'd be fun. I feel like I'd spend most of it helping you study, though," Louis remarks. The two boys pull away and Harry shrugs and keeps holding the boys hand across the table.

"We help each other. That's what we do," Harry points out and Louis just smiles his crinkly eyed smile and nods.

•••

Walking home Harry feels relaxed for the first time in forever. He doesn't know what made today different than the night at the lake or any other day, but today was different. He feels good about today. He feels like he can conquer the world today and that's the reason he stops when he sees Liam smoking outside of Niall's house.

"Hey," Harry calls to him. Liam looks over lazily and he eyes Harry up and down and just takes another drag off of his smoke. Harry walks over and Liam gives him a look, but puts his cigarette down.

"Yes?" He asks. He sounds inconvenienced and Harry can care less about that. He needs to get all his closure for living people out of the way today. If he can manage to do that then he can, then he can focus on getting closure from dead people and then he can really work on fixing himself.

"What's your problem with me?" Harry boldly asks. Liam sighs and brings his cig back to his mouth.

"I don't have a problem with you, princess. Not everything revolves around you," Liam tells him curtly. Harry tries not to let Liam's words make him back down. He never stood up for himself when Chad was around, but he's not that Harry anymore.

"I'm well aware of that, thanks. What's your problem with me?" Harry asks more forceful and Liam's eyes go wide.

"Got yourself a backbone I see. I honestly don't have a problem with you. You cry a lot and that's kind of stupid, but you have reason. I just don't have anything in common with you," Liam tells him in a bored tone and Harry just looks down frustrated.

"You don't have to be mean just because we're not friends."

"It's part of my charm though," Liam jokes and Harry just stares at him. Liam just groans and throws his dead cigarette on the ground and stomps on it with his boot. "I'll be nicer okay? Zayn loves you so you can't be that shitty." Harry just takes that for what it is and agrees. He slowly backs away, but Liam calls his name to stop him in his tracks.

"I'm going to give you a little piece of advice since I'm being nice. I know you still love that dead guy, but don't let him stop you from being with Louis to your fullest. That boy - from what I've seen - can love you more than anything in the world. Don't lose that."

Harry watches silently as Liam turns to go back inside after saying that and the words ring through his head over and over. He thinks he can probably love Louis more than anything too, he just really needs to make a final goodbye sometime.