A Lifetime of Memories

Telling the Fans

November 21 2013

"Jordie why are you giving me the cold shoulder?" I ask him entering his house with the spare key he gave me when he became a more constant presence on the team.

"I am not giving you the cold shoulder." He says walking into the foyer.

"That is bullshit. Ever since I told you that I was raped you haven't really talked with me or hung out with me, so what's wrong? You can't stand being around someone who was raped? You can't look at me the same? What is it?"

"It's true I can't look at you the same. I can't stand looking at you knowing that I could have been there to stop the guy. That I let my little sister down and I didn't even know that she was hurt. I am mad that you knew the guy and that he broke your trust by raping you."

"Why didn't you tell me this earlier? I don't understand why people automatically distance themselves when something bad happens to people. If you truly love someone you will stick with them no matter what they go through. You talk to each other to better understand what they went through and to tell them how you feel. You educate yourself on what happened to that person."

"What if I did educate myself about rape? That in the US there is a sexual assault about every two minutes. That sexual assault has fallen by 49% in recent years. 80% of victims are under the age of 30 and 44% are under the age of 18. Did you know his sexual past? Did you get checked for STIs?"

"I'm glad that you got educated and no I don't know his sexual past. I did get checked and I don't have any."

"I'm glad that you got checked for everything. Hey what are you doing for thanksgiving? I know that your family is in Victoria for American Thanksgiving and can't make it down but what are you and your extended family doing this year? Thanksgiving is in a week by the way."

"I think that we are just going to get together at Maggoo's and Papaw's but I don't know I am usually out of the loop till the last minute unless I plan the family gathering."

"Tell you what if you don't end up with your family you are always welcome to hang out with the Benn family as we celebrate American thanksgiving."

"Why do you guys celebrate thanksgiving when America does? I know that my family did both because my parents are American and Evan and I are Canadian. "

"Well because of hockey we celebrate during America's. You know Canada's is in October and the season starts at that time so it is hard to get with family so we decided that we would celebrate it in November."

"That is understandable and I will think about it."

"I got to get ready for the game tonight. Are you coming to the game tonight as a photographer or as a fan?"

"Both, tonight is the first night of me speaking for sexual assault victims and that is during the first intermission. So I will be taking pictures during warmups and the first period. Then I get to be a "fan" for the rest of the game and talk with people if they need somebody to talk to."

"We will all be there for you and if you need any of us you know where we are during intermission. Hell if you want us on the bench during your part I don't think Lindy would mind."

We get to the game and go our separate ways with Jordie going to the locker room and me going to my favorite spot to take pictures.

The first period went pretty fast as I was trying to somehow avoid speaking in front of a little over 15,000 fans. I am handed a microphone as it is almost time for me to go onto the ice and speak after the video plays about sexual assault. As the video ends I walk out to center ice and start speaking.

"Hello everyone, I am Hannah and I am the head photographer here with the Dallas Stars. You guys just watched a video about sexual assault and I am here to tell you about my experience with sexual assault. A year ago," I look over to the bench and the whole team was there, "I was raped by somebody that I know. I kept it a secret from everybody I knew until September of this year. I told the people I trusted most. The players of the Dallas Stars otherwise known as my second family were the people I told first. Sexual assault is not a joke. It is one of the hardest things I have had to cope with. After I was raped I started to drink and not care about school. Then the 2012 NHL season started finally and I got back into school which saved me from drinking heavily. I am very grateful for working with the Dallas stars organization and their willingness to help victims of sexual assault. If you have any questions I will be on the main concourse by section 116 if any of you guys want to talk. Thank you."

I walk over to the bench and give each of the boys a hug. I give a hug to Jordie and thank him for what he told me earlier. I stop at Jamie and pull him out on the ice.

"One last thing guys I have a question for Jamie." I say walking him to center ice.

"I have spent my whole, well close to whole, life with you and I want to spend the rest of my life with you. You mean the world to me and I don't want you going anywhere. I am breaking the tradition of male asking the female but will you marry me Jamie Benn?"

"Yes I will Banana but I don't have a ring for you."

"It's okay we can go pick one out later together. Go its intermission and you still have two periods to play."

"Okay my fiancée I will see you at the end of the game. Go help some people. Love you."

I head to the concourse right by section 116 and get many congratulations along the way.