Life I Left Behind (A Daryl Dixon Story)

Chapter Eleven

Charlie

16 years old

I wriggled my toes, tilting my head slightly as I admired my handiwork. My toe nails were now a perfect shade of bright, baby blue. I twisted the lid back onto the nail polish bottle, wrinkling my nose at the strong, unpleasant odor.

“Now what?” I asked out loud. It was a Saturday night and I was stuck at home. My parents had split a few hours ago to go on their monthly date night and I was put on baby brother control. It wasn’t a complicated task. Pop in a Power Rangers video and the kid was out like a light. Which left an entire night filled with boring, meaningless tasks that I didn’t really care too much for anyways. Like painting my nails.

I jumped as the phone suddenly began ringing shrilly. “Jesus Christ.” I mumbled, placing a hand over my rapidly beating heart. I answered before the second ring ended, hoping it hadn’t woken Gabe. “Hello?” I asked.

“HEY!” A cheerful female voice shouted.

“Oh hey, Abby.” I replied calmly, leaning back in my desk chair. I twisted the phone cord around my free hand. “What’s up?”

“Headin’ to a party. Can you sneak out?” My bubbly friend asked. I rolled my eyes.

“And leave my nine year old brother here alone? Uh, no.”

“Oh come on! He’ll be fine! I’m guessing he’s already asleep. Just come out for a little while and get home before your parents do. Gabe won’t even know you left. Pleeeaaaseee!” She begged me. I could hear other voices in the background, laughing and joking.

I sighed, shaking my head. “Abby, I can’t. Maybe next weekend.” I repeated. Like hell I would leave Gabe here alone. And anyways, I didn’t feel interested in hanging around with my usual crowd of friends tonight. In fact, I was starting to feel that way more and more lately. Abby continued to protest, chattering away on the other end. I half listened, knowing there really wasn’t anything she could say or do to convince me to leave my house.

‘Tap, tap, tap’

I froze, a soft knocking sound coming from the bedroom window behind me. I swiveled in my chair, and my gaze locked onto the person standing outside the panes of glass. “Hey,” I interrupted Abby, keeping my eyes on the figure. “I gotta go, I’ll just see you on Monday.” I didn’t hear anything else she said as I hung the receiver up. I crossed the room and unlocked the window, pushing it up. I stood back as he hoisted himself up onto the ledge and crawled inside. I shut and locked the window behind him. “Everything okay?” I asked.

I knew everything wasn’t, though. There was only one reason Daryl showed up at my window in the middle of the night asking to crash on my floor, and that was to avoid his daddy. We didn’t talk about it. It was just this unspoken agreement between the two of us. I think a part of me was afraid to know how bad it was, and Daryl just didn’t want to admit he was afraid to sleep in his own house when his daddy came home in a worse than usual drunken rage. Because that’s who Daryl was. He was tough, and I was the only person allowed to see him in what he considered to be his weakest moments.

Daryl didn’t answer my question, just sat down on the edge of my bed, resting his back against the wall. The desk lamp was dull, but I could still make out the dark colors on his cheek bone, and the red smear on his chin. “Holy shit.” I said quietly. I sat down next to him and took his face in my hands. He winced a little, but I was surprised when he let me touch him. “It’s getting worse, isn’t it?” I asked.

Daryl just nodded, wiping the blood from his lip with the sleeve of his jacket.

I felt my heart drop as I studied his busted lip and the green and blue colored bruise forming underneath his eye. Daryl had hinted that the abuse was more than just verbal, but I had never actually seen on signs of it. At least until now. “Don’t move.” I instructed him.

I disappeared into the hallway, checked to make sure Gabe was still fast asleep, before grabbing an ice pack from the kitchen freezer. I dampened a cloth from the bathroom and slipped back into my bedroom, shutting the door and twisting the lock just in case. I handed Daryl the ice pack and he pressed it against his cheek, shutting his eyes. I used to rag to wipe off the remaining blood on his lip and chin. I wanted to say something, but what? What was I supposed to say? Nothing I did or said would make this go away, and I knew Daryl wouldn’t do anything about it either. It broke my heart.

“I gotta git outta’ there, Charlie.” He finally said quietly, opening his eyes to look at me. I sat next to him, hugging one of my pillows close to my chest. “I dunno where I’ll go, but I can’t be there no more. One of these days, we’re gonna end up killin’ each other.”

“I wish I could do somethin’, Dar.” I answered with a sigh.

“You are doin’ somethin’. Ya don’t halfta lemme in every time I show up at yer’ window. But ya do. That’s doin’ somethin’.”

I gave him a small smile. It got quiet after that, but I didn’t mind. Daryl slumped back down onto my pillows, his eyes closing. Normally I made him sleep on the floor, but I couldn’t tonight. Not with him in this state. I pulled a blanket over him before curling myself up in the small space left next to him. His breathing got slower and deeper and I knew he had fallen asleep. I watched him for a short moment, wishing again there was more I could do. Wishing that I was bigger or stronger so I could protect him.

I couldn’t, though. I just had to hope that Daryl meant what he had said. That despite everything else we had been through, that just me being here for him…. was enough.