Broken #Wattys2016

The War Inside Of Me.

The War Inside Of Me.

There is a war going on inside of me.

It's all hidden, my shell is hard, so no one can see.

Two sides of me, fighting for control.

I'm trying to let the good win, but it's hard to do with a darkened soul.

My heart is constricted.

My two sides have my feelings conflicted.

The darkness is winning.

If that side wins.. This will only be the beginning.

Dark and light.

One full of hope, the other wants violence, just wants to fight.

Both sides are so damaged and broken.

Both handle it differently, one, shy and quiet. The other, sadistic and outspoken.

And yet, I just did exactly what I told him not to do.

I shut out all my friends, told them to leave me alone, just know, I'm doing what's best for you.

They can't see this side of me.

She's normally locked in her cage, but she found the key.

The darkness is trying to protect me from hurt.

But by doing that, she causes pain, she treats people like dirt.

You said you could deal with what I throw at you.

You can't. I'm not just mean, I'm awful. I'm relentless. You will believe what I say to be true.

I'm not as sweet as people think, that girl is trying to let herself heal.

The one in charge now, will pick you apart. She will crush you and rip you apart until you can no longer deal.

I'm alone. I've pushed everyone away, I know I will just cause pain.

But you need to get away from me, for this side of me, I cannot tame.

My defense mechanism has kicked in to protect me.

So please.. Don't try fix it.. Just leave me be.

I will tear you to shreds, I will break you without missing a beat.

I will just be alone with these two sides of war.. Until one of them lies in defeat.

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Thank you for reading :)

- Jade xx