Challenge Accepted(A Barney Stinson/HIMYM Fan-fiction) BOOK ONE

Chapter Three: Idiots

"Kids, as weeks went by we became better and better friends with Aunt Lauren. She started coming out for drinks with us, then coming to the apartment, and after a while, it was almost as if she'd been there the whole time, and it was awesome."

"So, being married. Different, not different?" Ted asked.

"It's the same, mostly. Except I think I might be getting carpal tunnel. My hand keeps cramping up from writing all the thank you notes." Marshall replied.

"Yeah, you're writing constantly. There's forms we have to sign, our death folders, thank you notes."

"Whoa, whoa, what are death folders?" Questioned Barney.

"It's a folder that they recommend married couples keep in case the other one dies. It keeps stuff like important addresses, account numbers, a letter to their loved one, that kind of thing. I learned about it in class the other day."

"Oh yeah! You're a law student aren't you?" Lily asked. I nodded. "I'll get the next round."

"Thanks Lil."

"I am such a jerk."

"Yeah...wait, why?" Barney and I said together, before high-fiving.

"I didn't know that I was supposed to write a letter. All Lily's gonna find in that folder are a bunch of bank statements and a funny list of things to do with my ashes."

"Marshal brownies?"

"Number six."

"Isn't that technically a form of cannibalism?" I asked.

"Ah." They all groaned.

"Oh, gosh, I am a bad husband. No, no, I'll just write Lily a letter tonight, everything will be fine."

"That's right. Unless...you die between now and then."

"Ooh." Ted agreed.

"But come on that's never gonna happen."

"Yes! If there's one thing we can state with absolute certainty, it's that Marshall Erikson is not going to die before writing that letter."

"Definitely, there's no way. In fact, I dare God to smite down this perfectly healthy-"

"HA HA HA HA. I get it. Ok, you guys know I'm a little superstitious, and you guys are trying to freak me out. Well, guess what? It didn't work. So, there."

"Five...four...three...two..." Marshall knocked on the table, threw salt behind him, and stood up, spinning in circles.

"You guys are jerks." He told us before leaving the bar, leaving us at the table, laughing.

"I'm gonna go check on Lily."

~~~Barney~~~

"Man, Lauren is amazing." Ted told me.

'Yeah, she's pretty cool."

"I'm thinking about asking her out."

"No, Ted, no." I argued.

"Why not?"

"Because, I have a challenge to complete."

"No! Barney, no! You aren't gonna sleep with Lauren. You're going to scare her off."

"Oh, I will not."

"Please, yes you will. You'll sleep with her, never call her again, and then she'll stop hanging out with us just to avoid seeing you."

"But-"

"Ah." He interrupted.

"I just-"

"Barney. No. Promise me, you won't try to sleep with Laruen."