Letters to Ghosts of the Past

When I Wish

To the ones I wish I didn't still miss,

In the end, I look back, and there's nothing to hide.
It lasted or it didn't, you must pick a side.
There's no in between, there's no going back.
It only took time before the walls began to crack.

Close your eyes and count the days, how long since our last talk?
How long since we were considered close?
How long since you shattered that lock?

When the storm dies down, and the memories fade
All we truly have left are the pictures that stayed.
Those people I see in those old photographs,
They're nonexistent, those smiles and laughs.

I look back on those moments, I think about them a lot.
But they slipped through my fingertips, as hard as I fought.
So I mark down the days, how long has it been?
Missing someone surely, that can't be a sin.

It's the classic tale of a friendship gone sour,
But I'd never guessed you'd be the one to cower.
If you want apologies, don't expect them from me
I hope you became who you wanted to be.

Make it easy, tell me I never mattered,
Announce it to the world
Say it to my face, this whole thing is shattered.

I guess in the end, there's not much to say,
Nothing went wrong, but nothing went our way.
What did come in our direction
Left with you and your affection.

The tears I've shed, you'll never see,
But they weren't for you, and they weren't for me.
I said I'd never miss you, and I hope you always know
That the bridges I have burned light my way back home.

This leaves me at the end of a chapter.
Or the beginning of something new.
Perspective is everything, it always was with you.

But my final realization,
When I wish I could turn back the clock,
When I wish we could join in laughter,
When I wish that we still talked,
When I long for the days we had,
When I hope we could reconnect,
When I remember none of the bad.
It was nothing I could detect.

All this time I've been wrong,
Looking through the wrong lens.
So just like that song,
There's simply nothing worse than knowing how it ends.