Carson Bailey is not an easy girl to befriend. With her constantly changing attitude and confusing actions, Griffyn Rivers is in for the friendship of his life. It wan't always this way. After a summer away, Carson (Cara) comes back with new friends...
Oops! This image does not follow our content guidelines. To continue publishing, please remove it or upload a different image.
CHAPTER TWENTY-ONE
If I had to pick one thing that I've never been good at, it'd be confessing. Whether I've told a lie or done something bad, I've never been good at admitting it. Even if everyone knows that I'm lying or that I did that one thing they're accusing me of, I still end up denying it, which always gets me into further trouble.
So why should anything be different, regarding the feelings I may or may not have for Griffyn? And there I go again, trying to deny the obvious revelation that I've just recently made about the recently developed thoughts I've been having of my best friend.
So I'll admit: I have feelings for Griff.
Yeah, it's not that hard to admit it to myself in my own mind. But thoughts are clearly different from actions!
Getting me to admit my feelings in my own mind is one thing. Getting me to admit my feelings aloud is a completely other thing! And if we go so far as to think of me confessing my feelings to Griffyn-- in person -- I might as well just dig my own grave and die right there!
I'd clearly been out of my mind if I'd been about to confess my feelings to Griff just the other day! I've smacked myself mentally about a dozen times just thinking of it. What a disaster.
Then I get to thinking of yesterday. About how it was a perfect day and yet, I still wasn't satisfied. Since when hasn't a perfect day with my best friend not satisfied me?
I'll tell you: Since I wanted him to be more than just a friend. And so I realized: There is no way that I can stay just friends with Griffyn. My feelings are not going away any time soon and if I keep acting strange in front of Griff, he's going to know for sure what's up. Then he'll ask me and since I can't really lie to him, I'll have to tell him. And that will be embarrassing.
Conclusion: If I tell him, I might just die of embarrassment.
Therefore, I decided resort to a technique I know best.
Distraction.
As long as I stay distracted, I can shove my feelings for Griff way down where even I don't know they're there and everything will turn out okay. Even if that means hanging out with Carolina, Alesha, and Penelope more instead of him.
But hopefully, the distraction will prove itself effective and I may, may just find my feelings receding and I'll think back to these days and laugh about how ridiculous I acted over nothing.
Now, I know my reasoning may sound a little absurd, not very well thought out, and a lot crazy, but I'm a desperate girl in a desperate time. And as they say: Desperate times call for desperate measures. Or is it drastic measures? I can't even be sure anymore...
