Okay maybe I lied when I said that jin was the most beautiful face I had ever come across because taehyungs face was just way too gorgeous for anyone to handle. His looks made me feel insecure actually.
My crushes on jin and jungkook died out because I thought they were too good for me. I thought that if I had dated one of them it would look like we were the beauty and the beast, with role reversal of course.
Normal people would hug each other in this type of situation which is what taehyung was expecting but what I had done was sigh in relief and say 'Thank god you're not a crusty sixty year old man'
Taehyung being Taehyung simply chuckled and sat at the seat across from mine. I know that it was just a simple action and that I sound really extra right now but I couldn't help but feel butterflies erupt im my stomachーTaehyung was just ethereal. Everything about him was just beautiful. His eyes, his hair, the color of his skin and just everything.
The one feature that took my attention the most was his box smile, it was really cute. It reminded me of an idol though but I can't seem to remember his name. Bacon? I just can't seem to put my finger around it.
"Umm..yura"
"Baekhyun?"
"Oh come on! I don't look like that baekhyun dude" he pouts.
"What are you talking about?"
"You just said that I look like an exo member" he says, frowning.
"Oops" He probably heard me trying to remember baekhyuns name. "You do look like byun baekhyun from exo though"
"People tell me that a lot but I really don't see it"
I smiled at him because he's honestly just so cuteーI just want to squeeze his cheeks. I should probably keep this thought to myself though or else it'll seem like I'm coming on too strong.
"You are honestly so cute, I want to squeeze your cheeks"
Excuse me while I go kill myself.
"I'm sorry I just say everything that comes to my mind when I'm really nervous" I said as I hid my face between my hands. On a scale of one 1 to 10 on how embarrassing this was for me, I'd rate it 645.
"So you think I'm cute, huh?" Taehyung asks like the cheeky headass he is.
"Just shut up okay" I said hiding my face in my hair this time because it was redder than a fucking tomato.
Is redder even a word though? What the fuck is up with me?
"Well I think you're cute too" he coos and looks at me. Really looks at me. I know this is weird but sometimes I felt like the way someone would look at you speaks louder than their words. This was one of the times where I felt like thatーeven though his manners were teasing, his eyes looked far from that.
"Umm..I need to go to the bathroom" I said because I really wanted to collect my thoughts. This whole situation was too new to me.
"Oh okay" Taehyung says looking down at his lap a little.
"I'll just go really quick" I said getting up and running into the bathroom.
As soon as I entered, I headed for the mirror and stood right in front of it. I just needed to calm down that's all. Needed more confidence too.
It felt like this wasn't happening. Taehyung did not just look at me like that and I didn't feel the way I was feeling at this moment.
It's only been a couple of weeks, yes, but I just felt like I've know him since forever and it was nerve wracking to say the least. This whole situation is making my confidence drop tremendously. I wasn't used to this. Wasn't used to being looked at with anything but hate or disappointment. Wasn't used to soft gazesーI was bound to ruin my chances of actually going further with taehyung if I didn't get my act together though, which is why I need to get my shit together so I can try and not embarrass myself any further.
I decided to just wash my face and head on outside again. I just hopped that Taehyung would have the decency to not ditch me for taking so long.
No, I need to stop thinking so poorly of others and give Taehyung a chance. He might be weird sometimes but he definitely wasn't an asshole.
I was about to open the bathroom door so I could leave but I bumped into the most unexpected person on earth.
My mum.
Holy fucking shit.
I'm screwed now, aren't I?
"Yura, what are you doing here?" She asks, anger almost oozing out of her eyes.
I was going to answer her but then I noticed her appearance. She was wearing a pretty dress, had her face caked, had her heels on and she even had her hair down, which were all things that I haven't seen her do in years.
"Well you look nice, are you out with someone?" I found myself asking her without even taking a second to think about it.
"I asked you first young lady"
It was weird hearing her call me young lady when she looked like that. You see, my mum is really pretty so she looks like a celebrity right now while I look like shit compared to her.
"So?"
"I'm out with a friend"
"I swear to god park yura if it's a boy, I will..."
"You will what mum? Huh? Throw me out of the house? Well I hate to break it to you but you already did."
I felt like crying now. This wasn't happening.
How unlucky did I have to be in order for me to run into my mum here, out of all places?
"How dare you talk to me like that?" she said raising her hand to slap me but I held it before she could.
"Enough!" I raised my head so I could look her in the eyes "I've had enough of you not hearing me out and not caring about what I think or feel!"
My breathing was erratic because I was trying to hold the mental breakdown I was about to have in. She wasn't going to see me be weak so I let her hand go and left her in a temporal state of shock.
I decided to leave the bathroom and head towards taehyung so I could end this nightmare.
"Let's go"
"Why, what's wrong?" Taehyung asks, knitting his eyebrows together.
"Park yura get back here and tell me who that boy is" she said fuming towards our table and making everyone grow quite and stare at us.
I started to feel my breathing grow shorter and my face grow red. So, I ran out of there. I couldn't handle all the eyes boring into my soul. It was like a horror movie.
This was just my concept in life. Run out and hide when I can't handle the situation.
I made a run to my favorite building which happened to be quite near. It was the building that hid in the clouds, the sky was clear today but you still couldn't see its end unless you stood a few miles away.
I was now making my way up to the rooftop through the fire escape stairs. I then opened the door and walked towards the edge so I can sit there.
Now taehyung will never want to talk to me after seeing a glimpse of how my life's like
I sighed before starting to cry. My problem was that once I start crying about one thing, I start remembering everything else that hurts me. So I cry more.
My mums unfairness
My dad abandoning me
Getting embarrassed in the hallway
Getting called out on campus
Being known as an ugly slut
The fake nudes
All the bullying and neglect I've suffered throughout my existence.
I then sobbed and sobbed trying to let all out, no matter how impossible it may be.
I let the loneliness and pain engulf me but that was until I felt a pair of arms surround me.
"I'm here for you"
