Bound To You

Chapter 27

Ok, as for the Colton's POV, it will happen. As for the sequel, it will happen also. Here's the twist. I'll have ALL of Colton's POV in the sequel. So essentially, you lovelies will get both, and no potatoes will be thrown :) if you guys are confused, I shall explain.

The sequel will have Colton's POV on THIS story. What he thought about when he met Indie at Walmart, etc. so basically, it's Bound To You in his thoughts. I'm still trying to think of a name, so bare with me. If you have any questions/queries/concerns, please leave a comment, or inbox me, I'll be happy to answer.

ALSO, those who wanted a list of the songs that are mentioned in this book, I shall post a list soon. Ok, sorry for rambling. Enjoy!!

WAIT! WHAT DO YOU GUYS THINK ABOUT ME ENTERING THIS IN THE WATTY AWARDS??

______________

I swallowed hard, my bottom lip quivering as I watched the trees pass by in a blur.

Twenty minutes had passed since my slight...anxiety attack. We were now on the way to wherever Derek and Dave were taking us. Colton was driving in his car, with Vincent and Saxon driving their car behind us.

I watched Derek's car in front of us slow down, and pull over to the side of the road.

We were on a deserted freeway, as you could probably imagine, so luckily for us it was quiet.

"I'll go see what's up." Colton said softly, staring at me worriedly.

I nodded mindlessly, my left elbow resting on the sill of the window, which I was still looking out of.

"I'll be back." He said, looking at me a moment longer before leaving the car and walking ahead towards Derek.

I took a deep, shaky breath, and closed my eyes.

After I had woken up and was literally scratching at my chest, Colton had been very on edge around me.

I don't blame the guy though. For all he knew, I would burst out in tears at any given moment.

But what I dreamt about irked me. After all, it wasn't a dream. It was a memory. One that I don't exactly like reliving, because it brings up emotions I don't want to feel.

I thought I was done with all the emotions, all the tears. I thought that after I had told Colton about Jayden, that maybe I would feel better. But in fact, I don't. I fell the exact same as I did before.

Worse even.

And I'm scared that if I open my mouth the slightest bit, incoherent sobs will break through and just make me a muddled mess.

That's exactly the reason why I haven't explained anything to Colton. The poor guy was constantly looking over me while he drove, waiting for me to say something.

But I haven't yet. And I probably won't.

I just don't want to tell him that it's about Jayden. I don't want him to think that I'm not over him.

'But you're not. You're not over Jayden, and you know it.' A voice in the back of my mind told me.

'I am. I have Colton.' I argued, opening my eyes with furrowed brows.

'You have Colton.' It said. 'But you haven't let go of Jayden. You need to let go.'

"It's not easy." I spoke aloud now, looking down at my hands. My voice came out raspy from all the silence that I've displayed. "It's not." I whispered.

'Make it easy. You know how much he loved you. How much he cared for you. But you have to let him go, you need to. He wouldn't want you living like this, would he? Would he want to see you miserable with your life, and not able to move on?'

Who is this voice? It surely can't be any part of me.

"I don't want to let him go." I said softly. "I can't."

'What about Colton?' The voice urged. 'Are you just going to string him on? Keep him believing that he's the only one you'll love from now on? He deserves better.'

"I'm trying." I murmured, looking up and watching Colton through the windshield speak to Derek. "I keep on hurting the people I care about." I sighed, looking down at my hands. "I'm such a mess."

I guess the voice is right. Colton shouldn't be treated like this. I shouldn't be thinking about anyone else besides him. He's my mate, and he deserves loyalty.

But I can't, for the sake of me, just forget about Jayden. I can't just drop him, and forget he ever existed. He was a big part of my life, and yes, I do still have slight feelings for him.

But the feelings aren't as big as I hold for Colton. When I'm with Colton, I always get these machine barring butterflies in my stomach, and my heart constantly flips maniacally whenever he smirks, or does the smallest thing.

Like breathe.

And I do feel bad. Of course I feel bad. Why should I be thinking of Jayden? I loved him, I did. He was an amazing being, but it's time to let him go. It's what he would have wanted; for me to get on with my life, to stop sulking and enjoy the life I was given; the one he didn't get to live properly.

"Hey. I'm back." I jumped a little at the sound of Colton's voice, but instantly calmed down. His eyes once again held concern as he stared at me. "Sorry. Didn't mean to scare you." He apologized.

I shook my head, moving my hair behind my ear. "It's fine." I said, attempting to give him a small smile.

I guess it did some good, for he gave a relieved smile.

"Did Derek say why he stopped?" I asked, rolling the window back up as I felt a cooler breeze pass by. Colton nodded his head, leaning back in the leather seat as he did so.

"His car jammed up. We need to wait for someone to come by and fix it." He explained.

"Why doesn't he just leave it here, jump into one of the cars we have, and come back for it tomorrow?" Colton scoffed, giving a small smile.

"Two problems. One, he refused to leave his 'baby' here alone, and second, who's car will he go into? Sure as hell isn't going to be mine, and I highly doubt Vincent or Saxon will welcome him much. Especially Saxon." I nodded in agreement.

"Understood." I breathed out a small laugh, leaning back into my seat and looking out of the window once again.

It was quiet for a few moments, before Colton spoke.

"Help isn't coming here for another hour or so." He started. "So, you wanna take a walk to pass time?" He asked, sitting straighter.

I knew this walk would be more than just to 'pass time'.

It was blatantly obvious he wanted to know what in the world I was thinking, and what had transpired a while back.

"Sure." I said, fixing my t-shirt up as I opened the door. The slightly cool air whipped my hair around, sending it flying everywhere.

I reached back into the car, grabbing my jacket off the back of the seat, and followed after Colton, who was walking opposite the cars.

I had reached him, and for a small while we just walked silently down the road, the quietness serving sweet serenity.

"Look, I don't want to push you or anything..." Colton trailed off, hoping I'd finish the sentence.

"It was a memory." I said, pushing my hands in the pocket of my jacket, which I had zipped up just a moment ago.

Colton looked at me, confused.

"The dream. The whole, me going crazy. It was my dream." He nodded in understanding. "It was the day I went to visit Jayden's grave. I was an emotional wreck. Still am." I laughed half heartedly, looking up from my shoes to the trees that swayed back and forth gently. "I had read a few of the poems I wrote about him. Back then, writing was the only thing that kept me sane. It sorta released my anger, prevented me from lashing out at people. Whenever I felt angry or sad, I'd just go to my journal, write stuff, and surprisingly I'd feel a lot better. I still felt shitty, but better than before." I explained.

I sighed, rubbing my arm. "Anyway, all I can remember is everything fading away from me, everything disappearing, and I was the only one there. It was like the day he died all over again, I was all alone. Nobody could understand what I had lost. Nobody understood the bond that I had with him. He was the only one that understood me, and when he died, I just couldn't comprehend anything that I did, or anyone else did. It felt like the world was against me, you know?" I asked, looking up at Colton for the first time since I had spoked about Jayden again.

To my complete surprise, there was no anger, jealousy, hurt or disappointment in his eyes. It was all understanding. Like he knew what I had gone through, or what I was feeling right now.

"Yeah, I know what you mean. You feel like, nothing can ever go right again, and now that they're gone, you're all alone and always will be." He said. He nodded, looking ahead at the slowly setting sun. "Yeah. I know that feeling."

I looked down, staying silent for a few moments.

"It felt like something was eating at my chest. Something was burning me, or suffocating me, and I couldn't breathe. " I said finally, after the short silence.

"That's why you were scratching at your chest?" He asked, stopping and turning to face me. I nodded, stopping along with him.

"I was scared I was dying or something. It was like a repeated stab to the heart, or a choke or something. I tried breathing, but it just came out heavy, and I was just scared." I shrugged my shoulders, feeling my bottom lip quiver the slightest bit.

I think Colton had sensed it, because he came closer to me, embracing me in a tight hug, his face buried deep in my hair.

I sighed, closing my eyes as I hugged him.

This was exactly what I needed right now.

Someone to show that they were there for me. Someone who wouldn't judge me on my problems, who could understand or relate to me, and someone who made me feel safe.

Someone like Colton.

______________

"You have something on your shirt." I said, pointing at Colton's chest as I sat in his lap inside his car. He looked down, searching for the supposed 'something' while I sent my finger towards his nose, giving it a small flick.

I laughed at his surprised face, shaking my head.

"I can't believe you fell for that!" I said, laughing as he poked his tongue out at me. "Mature." I chuckled.

He scoffed, letting a smile escape onto his lips. "You should know by now, that neither of us are mature."

I made a thinking face, slowly nodding in agreement.

"Yeah." I said. "You're right." I laughed as I flicked his nose again, to which he poked out his tongue, this time blowing raspberries.

I laughed uncontrollably as his fingers made their way to my sides, tickling me as I thrashed around, laughing my head off as he tickled the living daylights out of me.

"You...evil-hehe...bastard." I managed to choke out through laughter. He gave a hearty laugh, stopping his tickling as my face went red.

"You laugh like a chipmunk." He laughed, poking my nose. I opened my mouth in mock offense, crossing my arms.

"I do not." I replied.

"Do too." He said, crossing his own arms. I narrowed my eyes at him.

"I so don't." I said, raising an eyebrow, almost challenging him to argue with me.

"You so do." He replied with a smirk. I narrowed my eyes further, but smiled as my eyes landed on his nose.

"Yeah, ok." I said, making him believe he had won. "But you're the one with a button nose." I cooed, pinching his nose like a grandmother would to her grand child, and made baby noises.

He slapped my hand away, scowling half heartedly.

"This." He said, gesturing to his nose. "Is a manly nose." He finished. I laughed, pinching it once again.

"Not it's not. It's a small, round, cute button nose." I said, stressing on the word cute.

He huffed out a breath of air.

"So." I trailed off, raising an eyebrow. "I win?" He narrowed his eyes at me.

"No." He said, moving his hands to my thighs. He smirked, looking down, then back up to meet my face. "I win."

He suddenly crashed his lips onto mine, kissing me passionately as I just sat immobile on his lap.

After a moment of shock passed, I began kissing him back, rolling my eyes internally at the smile that had made it's way to his lips.

Just before he could say anything, I broke the kiss away, smirking. He made a move to kiss me again, to which I moved my head.

"Guess what?" I whispered, moving my head close to his so our faces were mere inches apart.

"What?" He asked, his voice barely a whisper. I smirked, glancing at his lips.

"I win." Before he could do anything else, I hopped off his lap, and left the Impala, leaving a slightly shocked Colton sitting in the driver's seat.

I laughed softly to myself, making my way to Derek, who was at the hood of the car with road assistance.

"How's it going? Will she live?"' I asked, leaning against the passenger door with a hand at my hip.

Derek groaned, his hands fisted in his hair.

"I don't know." He shrugged, swearing under his breath.

Wow. Was he really that distraught? Over a car?

"Calm down sissy. I'm sure they can fix it." I said, gesturing to the two men who were tightening some screw in the engine.

"If I wasn't so depressed right now, I would come up with an insult toward your insult." He said, banging his head against the door of the driver's side.

I rolled my eyes, making my way back to Colton's Impala.

"Alrighty. Good luck." I said, beginning to walk away from Derek. I turned around, my eyes meeting Colton's.

His eyes were harsh. Like, really harsh.

Had I done something?

Before I could evaluate deeper onto the matter, I saw why Colton looked so dangerous.

I groaned internally at the sight of Dave, my fists involuntarily clenching.

"What does he want?" I asked myself, my expression already getting slightly cold.

As I reached the two men, I stood next to Colton, crossing my arms and raising an expectant eyebrow toward Dave.

"The deal was that you weren't to talk to me if we came." I said.

"This is important." He said, a slight frown on his face. I sighed, rubbing my eyes tiredly.

"What?" I asked, quite rudely.

I was in no mood to use manners with him.

"We need to talk." He said with a sigh. I nodded.

"Sure. About what?" I asked. He looked toward Colton, then back to me.

No. Don't even think about asking that.

"Alone." He said. I sighed, shaking my head instantly.

"Whatever you need to say, you can say it in front of him." I said, and could almost feel Colton's smug smile.

"Look, I'm really not in the mood for this." Dave said with a sigh.

"Yeah, neither am I." I said. "But if what you need to talk about is important, then you'll say it in front of him."

He shook his head, letting out a breathy humorless laugh.

"It's about us, Indie. And I'd rather talk to you and only you about it. So if you care enough to at least hear me out, let me know. Other wise, goodbye." Without so much as another word, he walked off, sending me one last glance.

I sighed, pinching the bridge of my nose.

"Why is my life so corrupt?" I asked, looking up at Colton. He was still watching Dave retreat back to Derek, where he was at least welcomed.

"Don't get mad." Colton began, looking at me. "But maybe you should talk to him." I looked at Colton incredulously.

"Excuse me?" I asked, wondering if I had heard right.

Surely I hadn't.

"I don't know, but maybe you should see what he wants. By the look of his eyes, and the beat of his heart, I'm gonna guess that it's a touchy subject." My incredulous expression hadn't yet left my face. Colton sighed, leaning back against his car. "Look Indie, I know you hate the guy, but hear him out. See what he has to say." He said with a small shrug. "And maybe without interrupting him." He added.

"I'm sorry, are you insane or something?" I asked. "Me? Talk to Dave?" I let out a humorless laugh. "I'd rather get my piercing ripped off by a rabid squirrel."

Colton rolled his eyes.

"This is your dad, Indie. Whether you like it or not, he's related to you. You don't have to be on the best of terms with him, but at least make an effort to show you care."

"But that's the thing." I said. "I don't care."

"Well can you at least try? You never know what you have until it's gone, and unretrievable." He said, giving me a meaningful look.

I stayed quiet this time, looking back at Dave, who was sitting at a log near the grassy part of the highway.

I sighed, looking down at my feet.

"I know how you feel." Colton said after a moments silence. "My mom did the same. I know how it's like, to feel as though they're replacing you and your family with someone else. As if everything that happened meant nothing." He said, his voice slightly distant, even though he was still standing next to me. "I know how you felt, when he told you he was leaving to be with someone else. It felt as if he has slapped you right in the face, yet he still wanted things to be the same between you, right?" He asked.

I nodded, not at all surprised that he had gotten it right on the target.

He nodded, looking down at his feet, then to me.

"Talk to him. At least try." He said softly, lifting a hand to my face. He gave me a small, sweet kiss on my lips, and turned me in the direction where Dave sat. "Try." He said, before pushing me towards him.

I swallowed hard, nodding at Colton, before making my way slowly towards Dave.

I mean, Colton had a point. I should at least try, even though I really don't want to. He is my father after all. I don't like the fact, but...I used to.

I do miss the days where we would go to Baseball games together. I miss the times where he'd take me to a boxing match, and would do anything just to get front row seats.

I actually miss...him. Us.

"What changed your mind?" He asked, sensing someone was behind him. He stayed looking out toward the almost dark sky.

"Colton." I said, taking a deep breath, and sitting next to him, leaving quite a big gap between us.

"Has he had a change of heart about me?" He asked, still looking ahead.

"Apparently so." I said, more to myself than to him.

It was quiet for a while, neither of us willing to say anything yet.

"I'm not going to pretend that I'm not angry still. Because I am." I said, crossing my legs into a yoga position. "But I'm willing to listen." I added.

"Remind me to thank Colton later." He said, looking toward me for the first time since I had reached him.

I looked into his green eyes. My eyes.

A bubble of emotions riled up inside my chest, but I willed them to stay down.

No emotions. None. At least not while I'm sitting near him.

"Look, I know you can't stand the look of my face. You've made that pretty clear." He gave a small laugh. "But I feel like I've missed out on so much of your life."

"That was your decision." I said with a small shrug, bringing my knees up to my chest and wrapping my arms around them.

"It wasn't." I scowled at the grass.

"It was when you ran away with her." I said, my voice slightly harsh.

"I had never anticipated that things would happen the way they did."

I scoffed. "You didn't anticipate that you leaving would create a massive gap between us? That it would make me hate you so freaking much? That it would make Leon hate you, and make mom feel pathetic? You honestly didn't realize that that would happen when you had decided to up and leave with some gold digging tranny?"

"Veronica isn't a gold digger." He had said, not as confidently as the previous times he had said that to me.

And I knew exactly why. He knew I was right.

"Oh really? Well, would you like to tell me where she is now? Now that you've quit your job, and don't have as much money, please, tell me. Where is she?" I shook my head, looking back down at my shoes. "That marriage was not out of love and you know it." I scoffed. "Hell, you knew it when you were having that little affair of yours. You knew, deep down, that no one would ever love you the way mom did."

My eyes were slightly harsh as I looked back up at him. He was quiet, actual regret and...sadness in his eyes.

But I didn't regret what I had said. Someone needed to tell him, that what he did was wrong, and he was an idiot in believing that Veronica actually loved him.

"And now, you've lost her." I said, slightly quieter than before. "You can never get her back. You've hurt hurt her, made her feel pathetic and got her thinking that nobody will ever love her. You've made her feel useless." I shook my head, staring ahead as tears lined my eyes.

Mom's hurt expression when Dave had said he was leaving her popped into my head, and I bit my lip in order to prevent myself from swearing at him.

"I never meant to hurt her. Hurt you, or Leon." He said quietly.

"Well, you did." I said, my voice cracking the slightest bit at the end of the sentence. "And I don't think I can ever forgive you for that." I added, staring at the now starry sky.

I sighed, shaking my head as my bottom lip quivered again.

This was definitely not as easy as I thought.


________________

Ba dan tsssss. Same ending sentence as the previous chapter, did you guys notice?

Firstly, a little feelz in this chappy. Second, OMFG I ACHIEVED MY GOAL OF HALF A MILLION VIEWS!!! What?!?!

You guys are so amazing, I couldn't have achieved ANY of this without you loyal readers, voters and commenters, so thank YOU!

Also, we popped up SECOND on Werewolf-Humor books, out of like, almost 8,000 which is freaking amazing.

Ahhh. And to top off this fantabulous day, I just got tickets for Paramore and You Me at Six, so WOOOOOOOHOOOOO!!!!!!!!

I love you guys so much! PLEASE, comment and vote. It takes hours for a writer to write a chapter, minutes to read it, seconds to press that very motivational button at the top of this page, and only a few moments to leave a lovely comment. Or a comment about throwing potatoes, whatever :D

Lub ya lovlies!!

Stay awesome! -Sabrinaa