Rollercoaster

All Night

Naji

 Somebody tell me what she tripping for?
I mean what am I doing?
What am I doing?
I'll get to leaving cause' what we going through is foolish.
I mean what am I doing to make her act this way...

I watched as Que rehearsed for his upcoming show. He wanted to add new song to his set so he is going over some of the songs from Fan Affiliated.
Que lowered the music " Naji you want to do these next songs with me ?"

" Yeah sure what songs? "

" All night and 5 steps, you could do the chorus to both "
*
*
*
" Do you ever think about singing professionally, you're really good Naji."

" Que you already know that answer. I don't like singing with or around anyone but you, I don't want to pursue a singing career because it's not realistic for me"

" look at me, it's realistic for me."

" You've been doing this since you we're 14, this is your dream and passion not mine."

I hated when we talked about this, I know that I can sing it's just that I'm not as serious about it as Que is. I can't just stop my life to pursue a dream. I'm just not comfortable with singing in front of others and Que knows that.

" I'm just saying, why throw something like this away? "

" Que can we not talk about this anymore? "

I got my stuff from off the dance floor and put my bag over my shoulder.

" I gotta go anyway, I gotta pick up Nia."

I was kind of mad at him so I didn't say bye, I just left the dance studio and walked out to my mama's car and drove to the babysitter to get Nia. When I got there my baby was crying her little heart out. She must of been hungry or tired because I picked her up and started rocking her around she was fast asleep. I put her in the car seat and drove off.

*

Once I got home I was able to put Nia in her crib and get a little time to myself.
After about an hour I got a text from Que asking me to come over. My mama wasn't home so I couldn't leave and I just put Nia to sleep and I didn't want to wake her up. I told him to just come over to mine. 

A few minutes later Que walked into the house and called out my name.

" I'm in the living room! "

He walked into the living room and sat next to me.

" So what's up witchu' ?"

I really didn't want to have a repeat of the last conversation.

" Nothing, I'm fine."

" You ain't seem fine back there but I'm gon' leave you alone."

" Good."

I could feel Que looking at me like he wanted to ask me something. When I looked over at him he was biting his lip, which he did when he was nervous. 

" Just gon' head and ask what you gotta ask?"

"Okay, I know you moved back here a few months ago but why."

I was honestly dreading this conversation. I never thought Que actually cared as to why I came back. I never wanted to actually tell him but it's been long enough, he deserves to know.

June 2011
Naji was in her lunch period, she was sitting at the table by herself since her friend Missy didn't come today, just chilling when a few of her classmates came up to her.