Old Friends

36- Tearing Down Walls

Tears still slowly leaked out. "Caitlin, why are you so upset? I never yelled at you or was ever mad." He questioned. I honestly had no clue. I was just emotionally on edge.

"Just forget it, Sam. Don't worry about it. Let's get some sleep."

"Don't shove me away. Why are you upset?"

"I honestly don't know, ok? I'm just emotionally on edge I guess. I'll stop crying and get some sleep." I stated. I frantically wiped my eyes and tried to make the tears stop.

"I never had a problem with the tears. You can cry all you want. I just want to be sure you don't go to sleep upset with me. Shh. Shh." He cooed as I laid there. "It'll be ok. Everything will be ok." I curled in closer to Sam and placed one arm across his chest. He put his arm around me and began gently rubbing my shoulder. "I'm right here. I love you and you're safe and ok with me right here."

"I love you too." I replied and was out soon after.

We got up in the morning and I made a promise with myself. I was going to quit focusing on the bad and start focusing on the good.

"Morning. How are you doing?" Sam asked.

"Better. I've decided I'm gonna quit focusing on the bad. I'm gonna focus on helping you guys with research, having this child, and loving you. I'm tired of the tears and tired of life going so poorly. I'm gonna stop." I told him.

"That's good. You don't have to never let yourself cry though. Just know I'm here for you for anything." He replied. He let out a slight groan as he sat up.

"Thanks. How's your back?"

"It hurts a lot more than yesterday. I think it's probably turning black and blue now."

"Can I look?" I asked. I wanted to see how extensive it was. He lifted his shirt and he was right. His whole back was covered in black and blue spots and some were turning purple already. I put my hand over my mouth in awe at how bad it looked. "Wow. You're whole back is pretty much black and blue. How are you not screaming in pain right now?"

"I don't know. I guess just from getting hurt on hunts all the time, I'm kinda used to being in a lot of pain. I can manage." He stated nonchalantly. I think he just didn't want to worry me.

"Sam, will you do me a favor?"

"Sure. Anything."

"Stay in bed with an ice pack and rest. I'll help Dean research. Please. I don't want to worry about you all day and I will be if you're up and around. If we need help we'll get you or come ask you, but I want you to rest."

"Fine." He replied. I went and got the ice pack.

"I'm sorry. I'm not trying to baby you but I want you to get better. I just worry." I told him. He seemed mad I wanted him to rest.

"I know." He replied. I walked out to Dean.

"Hey, I'm helping you research today. Sam's back is severely bruised. Like it's almost entirely black and blue."

"Ok. Sounds good. I don't really have a lead, just looking around to see what there is." I agreed and we spent the day researching.