Lydia's Shy (completed)

15. Quite the Collection

(Quick A/N: this chapter discusses [not describes. I didn't write a whole descriptive scene, I would never] sexual abuse and could potentially be triggering. I'm sorry if the wording sounds a little weird but I'm not quite sure how to say it. If you have trouble reading/ dealing with those situations please skip this chapter for your benefit. <3)

He hated Allison for telling him. Because all he could think about when Lydia asked him to sit in the bathroom with her– while she took a bath– was how his best friend had taken her to the doctor. Suddenly he was nervous to be around her. How was he supposed to act? No different, he knew, but acting normal suddenly felt wrong around her. It was difficult. His arms were folded on the lip of the tub, one of his fingers drawing circles with bubbles onto her arm as she read out loud to him from her current book.

And it was so hard to look at her knowing what he now knew. Not because it changed who she was in anyway, it had happened and there was nothing he could do to change that, but because she was weaker than she had told him. Lydia didn't show it at all though and that's what hurt him the most. She was strong and broken all in one. The reading trailed off causing his eyes to look up at her own.

"Why'd you stop?" He asks. Lydia visibly swallows, closing the book before setting it out of the bath.
"Allison told you, didn't she?" The girl whispers. There was no way for him to hide it but that couldn't stop him from trying.
"Told me what?"
"Don't lie." She scolds. Stiles sighs and that's all she needed to know.

And in the silence, Stiles replayed Allison's words.
"I had to take her to the....lady...Doctor..." She hesitates, biting her finger nail while watching his reaction. Okay? So what? Isn't that a regular thing girls have to do? Stiles shrugs. What was he supposed to say? He thought it was a normal thing. What the hell did he know about the feminine body and how it works and shit. But by Allison's expression, he suddenly knew it wasn't something normal. "What happened?" He asks.

Allison shifts on her feet, biting her lip. "When Lydia was thirteen she was raped." At this point the dark haired girl started crying because goddammit Lydia didn't deserve it. "Sh-she went to a party and she had a crush on this junior I guess... Him and, like," she swallows even though her mouth was dry, "three other guys took her back to a room an-"
Stiles cuts her off. He didn't want to hear more. The boy shakes his head while tugging on his hair and Allison places a hand over her mouth to silence her cries.

Lydia had been staring at the white tiled wall in silence, thinking of what to say. But she couldn't think and neither could he so they both just sit there. Apologizing to her seemed just plain stupid because an apology wouldn't solve anything.
"I had a nightmare that I was at the party again and I woke up and I couldn't breath." She whispers in a hurried voice. Out of nowhere she felt as if she couldn't breath again, because he knew too much. "Can-can you please get out?" She asks.

Stiles starts to stutter a response before deciding against it and leaving the bathroom. She didn't deserve it. She didn't deserve it. She didn't des– the bathroom door unlocks and Lydia emerges in her pajamas. Stiles was on her toe.
"Lydia I–" he grabs hold of her upper arm and the girl gasps, so small under his frame. The words wouldn't leave his mouth because shit, what the hell was he supposed to say.
"I'm uncomfortable." She mews, attempting to pull her arm back. He releases her, barely hearing her door close.

All he could think about was how bright her smile had been the day before. And how could someone hide so much pain so well. And Lydia freaking Martin did definitely not deserve this life because she was an angel and earth was not worthy of having her here. Behind closed doors, Lydia didn't cry. She didn't shed a single tear or linger on her past a moment longer, opening her book to continue where she left off.
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He didn't know how to act. Two days later he had taken her back to the hidden cavern at the beach but he still didn't know how to act. Stiles sat on the rocks with his little notebook full of words, a thoughtful expression on his face as Lydia wandered the shallower ends of the small pool of sea. Eraser shavings filled the crease in his composition book as well as the stone below him, faded words disappear on the page.

"Whatcha writing?" Lydia calls causing his eyes to lift to where she stood with a seashell in hand and emeralds gazing back at him. He stutters a few "um"s as she journeys over to where he sat and took a seat next to him, waiting for an answer.
"Just words I guess..." He mumbles with a shrug, looking down to the blank page that was now slightly grey from all the times he'd erased.
"Like a dictionary?" She asks. He shrugs again, handing her the journal before hoping into the water as she reads.

"You've got quite the collection." A light laugh escapes her as she snatches the pencil in her hand. Stiles kept his eyes trained on the water, not really searching for anything but just listening to the pencil scratching against the paper. There was nothing to do, nothing to say to her to bring him at ease. Her coughing interrupts his thoughts and he walks back over to her.
"You okay?" He asks after her fit is over.
With one final cough she nods. "Yeah. Just think I'm getting sick, that's all."

How could she act so non-chalant when inside, Stiles was dying for her.
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Authors note:

Let's be serious for a moment.

Rape and sexual harassment are very serious things going on. I do know a few people have been raped and some of them are pretty "chill" (obviously it's still serious to them) about it while others are very hypersensitive on the situation. The first time one of my friends told me they were raped it was hard for her but it was just as equally as hard for me. I just wanted to hold onto her forever and yes I definitely did cry because nobody deserves to go through that.

I thought this was important to not on Lydia's storyline but also Stiles' and their growing relationship because it's not ever going to affect that one person, it affects people close to them as well.

Sorry this was kind of a depressing authors note but I needed to let y'all know💜
Comment, read, enjoy!
-Chloe
Ps. Double update. You're welcome hoes.