Exchange

Chapter 26

"It's a school dance Molly. Not an invitation to the nearest brothel." I stated, when Molly suggested I try on a black dress that contained more slits in it than fabric and would barely reach a toddler's knee.

Molly pouted, but relented and hung the dress back. "You're no fun."

I rolled my eyes but gave her a smile. "If you like it so much, then you try it on."

Molly glanced back at the dress, before quickly shaking her head and moving past me. "Nah, too slutty, even for me."

I dropped my jaw.

Molly quickly defended, "I'm taller than you! It'll look like a shirt on me. It would be decent on you though."

I scrutinised her with pursed lips. "Nice save."

She beamed. "Thanks."

It was a Friday, and we were all currently in London shopping for dresses, while the guys searched for suits. I had always been planning on gong with the girls to help and give advice, but I hadn't ever expected that I too would be searching for a dress to wear. 

Mason's question from a couple days before had stunned me. I hadn't even considered attending the dance before he had asked, mainly because, well it wasn't our dance and we didn't really have any obligation to go. And secondly, it was the the night before we left for home.

I was met with a mix of emotions at the thought of going home. The initial feeling was excitement. Excitement to see my mom, who I now hadn't seen for just under three months. God, I missed her. I missed her cooking and her citrusy smell and just talking to her while drinking tea and watching some random cooking show or movie on the television.

Then there was Kate. Not a day had gone by when I hadn't randomly thought of her and longed for her presence. It was small things that I wished I could tell her, wished she could see, knowing that she would snicker along with me under her breath like she had done since we were little girls.

I wished I could confide in her about my feelings for Mason. About how they were growing stronger and stronger and were starting to scare me. About how he confused me and had secrets and could make me cry so easily, yet also managed to make feel exhilarated and full and so, so happy.

I also just missed the familiarity of home. While England was beautiful and crisp and something else entirely, I missed the warmer weather. I missed the houses and roads in the town that I had grown up in and I missed my small, cosy home with its white walls and beige couches and same, comforting smell.

But then after that first feeling of excitement faded, it became replaced with sadness, and even dread. Though I'd only been on exchange for three months, the relationships I had formed with Molly and Em, JT, Nate, Chris and Connor were so strong that leaving them would be awful.

I would especially miss Molly, the person I had grown closest with, and just the thought of not being able to wake up and see her sleeping face every morning in the bed next to mine, brought a burning sensation to my eyes.

Leaving also meant reality for Mason and I. For the last three months, our relationship had been protected in this little bubble of security, without the threat of outside pressures or judgement or expectations. But going back would would effectively burst that bubble. 

We'd inevitably slip back into our same routines and patterns, and our time would slowly become filled with the mandatory, every-day problems of school and home and friends and life. Would our relationship get effected by it all? I didn't know. Was I eager to find out? Not at all.